Miss the Algarve :/
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If you can - in the middle of her rant, get up and go outside to take a walk.Thanks, that does seem to be the drift of the strategies I can find (and the only thing that worked on long-time bullies in school, too) is to keep my own equanimity and just let the other person act out. If it was only anger I kinda have that one figured out. Some of the other tactics are less obvious and have very deep roots and automatic brain pathways that cause knee-jerk reacting...usually a reaction of angry compliance. Sounds stupid but only because it is.
Ouch! I hate when that sort of thing happens. Love the little story about your bus ride with the ladies and the considerate driver, though. For a few minutes I was transported there with you.My car insurance came due and ate the money in the bank leaving me with a small overdraft, that's what went wrong.
I appreciate that and it's exactly the sort of thing I'm working on. My problem is that in the moment no other circuits work other than 'obedience' and 'something isn't right' but my cognitive thought process (as right now when I'm typing this and can think of other options) just isn't working at all in that moment.If you can - in the middle of her rant, get up and go outside to take a walk.
Her crazy is hers, don't take it on yourself - let go of your urge to people please because you're just rewarding bad behavior and encouraging a repeat performance.
REALLY good suggestion. I have never tried that but I just might.You're in my thoughts.
I do have one other suggestion - which is something that might work for a writer like you. Study her, as you would someone you are considering for a role in one of your stories or books. Maybe... perhaps that will establish enough cognitive distance that you can sit back and just observe her words and actions with less effect on you.
I went through a ton of sh!t, especially in my early life. I was disposable to those that should have cared for me the most. I was a throw-away person (my term), but managed to survive by looking inward for my own value rather than outward.
The weather has changed, warmer, but raining a lot, so I have been getting out there every time the rain stops and planting out all the little plants I germinated in the greenhouse, then they get rained on and settled in, perfect.
Having a deep think about my new YouTube channel. The 'writing as craft' essay simply didn't work just read out and thinking about it and improvising made it very slow and lugubrious. I will see if I can find some other bits that do work when they are just read to keep it going in the meantime. Upward and onward
Really sorry that anyone made you feel like a "throw-away person".... F%$#^%$ them.... one day, they will see your strength and courage and will want a place at your table.... Your courage in going forward in spite of their attitude is amazing and shows how fabulous you really are.... hugs...I went through a ton of sh!t, especially in my early life. I was disposable to those that should have cared for me the most. I was a throw-away person (my term), but managed to survive by looking inward for my own value rather than outward.