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Post the worst songs...ever! (1 Viewer)

Bruno Spatola

Senior Member
The spiritual successor to Robbie's spectacular shit-show, "Rudebox."

[video=youtube;EAmChFTLP4w]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EAmChFTLP4w[/video]
 

Olly Buckle

Mentor
Patron
By chance I discovered that if you go down the page clicking play you can get them superimposed on one another; multiply horrible
 

patskywriter

WF Veterans
I can’t believe it took so long for me to “contribute” to this thread. (But first, a quick side note: When Sesame Street first came on the air in 1969, I remembered being thrilled when I recognized “Bob,” who was one of Mitch Miller's “Sing Along” gang. And yes, I did spot him in the “Has Anybody Seen My Gal” video posted earlier.

This song, from the 1960s, is a Brazilian song that shows an unmistakable, though not fully absorbed, rock influence. The singer, Maria Bethânia, is considered a true diva nowadays. Her brother, Chico Buarque, another famous singer-songwriter, is also in this horrible, embarrassing video.

[video=youtube;dDZMx027cHI]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDZMx027cHI[/video]

You know things are bad when even the one black guy can't dance.
 

patskywriter

WF Veterans
Another Brazilian, Morris Albert (Maurício Alberto Kaisermann), had a huge hit in the early ‘70s with this abysmal, sappy song:

[video=youtube;wU0Pp2n6ooE]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wU0Pp2n6ooE[/video]
 

patskywriter

WF Veterans
Here’s the Muslim answer to Rebecca Black’s “Friday”—Raef sings “Jumuah.” (Jumuah is the Friday service at the masjid.) Admittedly, it’s better than the original, but still humorous when keeping it in mind:

[video=youtube;m0MqT-S9fiI]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m0MqT-S9fiI[/video]
 

patskywriter

WF Veterans
Here’s a Brazilian line dance, “Dança do Quadrado.” (The quadrado refers to the square each dancer moves around in.) Is it better than the “Electric Slide” or “The Wobble”? You decide:

[video=youtube;QL1WhxjKSjk]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QL1WhxjKSjk[/video]
 

Kevin

WF Veterans
Haha...The Gong Show. You knew as soon as they started in on "Feelings..." they were getting the hook. The Night Chicago died... Now that was great song. I think I rated it as a tie with Seasons in the Sun. My 10 year-old self couldn't stand that song. Ear torture. The radio would go off and stay off after that.
 

SilverMoon

WF Veterans
Why ruin a perfectly good song? Central lyric takes the cake. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tRwYQgk05DY

I've been trying to figure it out for years. Ohhh, nooo ......
And after all this time I still LOL each time I hear it.


4476833613_399004f7d6_z.jpg
 
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KenTR

Senior Member
[video=youtube;BTSpcMNf1c4]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BTSpcMNf1c4[/video]

At 2:12: "They beat me with a board/it hurt just like a sword"

Rick Johnson was right: these bitches suck.
 

seigfried007

Senior Member
[video=youtube;wn73ysFij50]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wn73ysFij50[/video]

This song was actually a parody of another song (wanting to say the original artist is a schizophrenic man in Chicago and one of the most prolific recorders ever, but I might be mistaken). Song was done as a joke to prank/honor another band with which this band is on friendly terms.

It's still a terrible song--but its at least a funny and deliberately bad song.
 

KenTR

Senior Member
Get out your prozac, kids! We’re about to venture into one of the most dismal, unfortunate corners of the post-punk D.I.Y. movement.

What are we to make of this monstrous affront to music with it’s disco beat, ponytail jams, and straight-from-a-1979-Ford station-wagon-cassette-player-demonstration-tape synth riffs?

For a band that identified with the early eighties minimal wave scene, they seemed to be unaware of any of it. I’d like to think they were being brave by aping the tenets of long-dead hippie pop songs, but no, I fear the truth is that they completely and thoroughly sucked balls.

Pairing a jaunty prophet 5 riff with a 4/4 beat does make for a brisk, lighthearted sound, but dig a little deeper and the whole thing falls apart like a rusted through wheelbarrow. Untreated piano? Sorry, guys. That’s not allowed in new wave. And that guitar solo, while reasonably proficient, still sounds like someone trying to scrape a wad of gum off his shoe while balancing on a treadmill.

The only sign of life here is the female vocalist. I like her style, but she would have been more at home with a band that didn’t ask their parent’s help with songwriting. I’m hoping that her pronunciation of the word art is affected, but considering the pretension that surrounds just about every other aspect of this song, I’m not holding my breath.

And then there are the lyrics. Excuse me while I regurgitate in my mouth for a moment. MTV and it’s increasingly commercial ethics were a prime target for punks and new wavers alike, but to make a sweeping statement that “Video is not art” without specifying what kind of video you are referencing is too smug for my tastes. "Video just isn't penetrating.." Really? That's your argument?? Who doesn’t remember doing bong hits at two in the morning while watching some inexplicably bizarre conceptual video on some obscure public access TV show? Video certainly can be art. Cold Dogs In The Courtyard cannot. And yes, y’all dig Bukowski’s poetry. Big deal. What grandiloquent college student doesn’t? Beware of the 1: 35 mark where you’ll find yet another lyrical couplet that’s so bad, it actually putrefied the stylus on turntables across the world:

The kitchen has it all screwed up/and cable shows us how to kill a pup.

Ouch! If there was a jail for bad lyricists, the guy who wrote this would be buried under it.

I know I can’t ever unhear this steaming pile of raccoon shit, but I can take solace in knowing the guy who wrote it ended up becoming - you guessed it - a video producer!

Life can be cruel when you’re too big for your britches.

[video=youtube;OzZO2r7jxr8]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OzZO2r7jxr8[/video]
 

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