I really glad to get your critique. Are you saying that you wondered if her baby was buried alive and THAT is the interesting part of what you read? LOL Well, I will need to re-write it to remove all thoughts of that! She just doesn't know if her baby gets born or not before she dies, and I'm medical enough that her question doesn't seem like a weird thing to wonder about and was my way of showing that she doesn't know if her baby gets delivered or not. It obviously needs clarity so that people don't think it's morbid. For sure I'm not going into horror with this story, sorry to disappoint you there.Fair enough. I like some of the thoughts that go into this too. This stood out though:
The question that tortures me in every life is if my baby will be buried here too. If so, will my baby be besides me or lying in my dead body? Do Michael and Granny raise my baby? Maybe this life I'll get closer to the truth, I've still got a few weeks, but every life Fate's fingers are busy in my business.
As a concept that's wonderful to me, if someone gruesome to consider. It's real though and that's what counts. The idea of a body being interred and a smaller body being interred within that body is something I'd love to play with. The only problem here is the way it's expressed. You could argue what you've just said is she'll be buried with the living baby inside her. To get around this and to focus on what I think is the more powerful aspect, would be to write it the opposite way. You begin that way but don't fully explore the idea at first. You simply worry the baby could be buried here too. I'd focus entirely on the baby being buried here within the protag. There's something very interesting about what you've said there that could, if written correctly, give certain people in society pause for thought. I'm not saying to moralise or to overtly state 'wrong' or 'right' here. I'm simply saying it's a little moment something more could be layered in.
Whew! Thank goodness for your feedback.