More Weirdness (1 Viewer)

[Quantum Loser]

Sadly, not as funny as the first one. :cry:
Probably because Vicky's not in it. :wink:
---

INT. SOMEBODY'S BACKYARD

AMY
Hi, I'm Amy and I am as sane as I am dead. And I'm very dead. This is my friend, Jennifer.

AMY gestures towards a cardboard cutout that is supposed to look like JENNIFER.

CARDBOARD JENNIFER
...

AMY
Hey, you're all two-dimensional! What gives?

CARDBOARD JENNIFER falls over.

JENNIFER
(v.o.) I went on vacation in Hawaii. This is a recording. Please do not attempt to talk to this recording.

AMY
Hullo, Recording.

BOB runs on-screen with a plastic butter knife.

BOB
Hi, I'm Bob the Cannibal-assasin!

AMY
Are you planning to kill someone with that knife you've got?

BOB
Yes...

AMY
Well, you've got the wrong knife.

BOB
Whaddya mean, I've 'got the wrong knife'?

AMY
I mean that you are holding a plastic butter knife.

BOB
It looks more like stainless steel to me.

AMY
Well, I think-- Look, a penny!

BOB
Say, have any of you seen Joseph?

AMY
He lives next door.

BOB
Thanks! I'll save you the head! (runs off)

AMY
You've still got the wrong knife.

JENNIFER
I've come back from Hawaii early! We drove!

AMY
How do you drive to Hawaii?

JENNIFER
I have no idea. I got you this dead fish, though. (holds up a rotten, putrid fish of pure STINK (and fish))

AMY
Umm...you can keep it...Jennifer? Are you still with us?

JENNIFER
Be quiet, I'm counting all the atoms in my leg.

AMY
Hey, shouldn't there be a plot?

QUANTUM LOSER
(v.o.) Nope. But now that you mention it, I think the reader might enjoy some cricket-bat violence.

AMY
Meep.

QUANTUM LOSER
(v.o.) The rest of this may be disturbing to five-year-olds, so I guess this is the end. Have a nice day.

AMY
Hey, why is it so much shorter than--(is cut off)

QUANTUM LOSER
(v.o.)THE END!!!

 

[Muffin Man]

It went in too many different directions. Even the insane needs a foothold for the audience.

 

[Quantum Loser]

Umm...Starrwriter? How many writers do you KNOW?! :shock:

 

[Viqto]

I disagree, Muff, I think that you should continue it jsut like you are. I hope it was a comedy because I was laughing. :shock: :lol: The randomness was good, and the fact they had no foothold fit in nicely with this randomness.

 

[Slot]

I disagree, as much as I love random behaviors and quirky concepts, there needed to be something "main" in all the chaos to help focus the viewer, and I don't think that was there.

Random chaos and behavior is definately amusing, and something many artforms lack these days, but why not try to tone down the confusion and hoopla and give us one main plot point to zoom in, with any other oddity happening in the background?

 

[Scott Tuplin]

Absurb theater is not absurb if it has a main plot... know what I mean?

You can't have a plot and make it effectively insane as well. At least, I don't think you can.

Nice work, Quantum.

 

[Quantum Loser]

As there's a tie, I think I'll stick to less... random... things until someone else posts their opinion.