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Larger Than Life (1 Viewer)

Annie. Marie

Senior Member
The earth transitions her dances
through concrete phases.
The moon chases the sun
as they run from the past.
The land destroys itself
to prove resilience to what it sustains.
The love strains between life and death
for the sake of exploration.
The heart burns itself
to make home for another’s.

And with everything our reality has to offer,
Still,
you are larger than all of it.
 

2020Syd2020

Senior Member
Hello,

I think this is a beautiful piece, there is a power about it that emerges as you read it. If I had to make a suggestion would it work if you moved The love couplet swapping it with the heart couplet and then remove the before love so that couplet stands as the turning point in the piece?

Cheers

Syd
 

ritudimrinautiyal

Senior Member
The earth transitions her dances
through concrete phases.
The moon chases the sun
as they run from the past.
The land destroys itself
to prove resilience to what it sustains.
The love strains between life and death
for the sake of exploration.
The heart burns itself
to make home for another’s.

And with everything our reality has to offer,
Still,
you are larger than all of it.

Hi Annie.

It is really beautiful. Destruction for reconstruction. The love strains between life and death for the sake of exploration.
I just loved it dear.

Keep writing

Ritu
 

Annie. Marie

Senior Member
Hello,

I think this is a beautiful piece, there is a power about it that emerges as you read it. If I had to make a suggestion would it work if you moved The love couplet swapping it with the heart couplet and then remove the before love so that couplet stands as the turning point in the piece?

Cheers

Syd

Yes! Thank you very much for the edit.
 
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