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I've been writing a romance about a rich girl and a poor girl (1 Viewer)

maviv

Member
Hey guys! First things first, i'm sorry for any mistakes, english isn't my first language.
I've been writing about a rich girl and a poor guy, it's a romance and recently i've realized that I should educate myself more to keep going with this book, so i could be able to go deeper into the characters story and feelings. So I was wondering if any of you have ever been in a relationship with someone of a different social class than yours? Could you tell me a little bit about how it was? How did the families cope with it? What did you have to face? What were the difficulties you went through? Or anything you think that should be relevant?
Thank you so much!

Enviado de meu Mi 9 SE usando o Tapatalk
 

LadySilence

Senior Member
Sentimental relationships no.
But I have met people who are "richer" than me.
They all had the same thing in common:
They were ashamed of me.
This is my personal experience.
 

indianroads

Staff member
Global Moderator
My wife of 41 years was from a higher class than me.

My parents were criminals and after their arrest I was put in juvenile hall (kid jail), then foster care, then I lived on the street selling illegal drugs. She was from a stable middle class family.

When we met I had worked my way through college and had a good job and was improving my life. the main problem we had was with her siblings, who thought I wasn’t good enough.

Oddly enough now we’re better off financially than than her family was and her siblings are now.
 

Matchu

Senior Member
My wife also claims this higher caste status.

At her most virulent she accuses me of 'lower middle class, at the very best' and sometimes 'abuse' gets me down in the dumps. Even the Commonwealth War Graves website today crammed with Privates and Corporals sharing my lowly surname. Her relatives being exotic, 8th Army and such-like/pilot-officers. My saving grace and usually round about 2am with whisky is that my people were Protestant while hers were Anglo-Catholic, the 19c religious sect, & like Baptists almost. So I win come bedtime.
 

Zlodesk

Senior Member
I've had an experience that might seem strange.
My wife's family are farmers, and my mother was a paralegal and my father is an investment manager. Growing up, i always had everything i needed, thought it ended up being very important, as i'm chronically ill and cannot work.
My parents, thankfully were able to afford the very expensive treatments involved, as well as providing me with a very comfortable lifestyle, although they struggled not to spoil me with the money they had.
When i met my wife's family, not only did they reject me because they thought that my wife would be supporting me through hard work, they seemed to think i had no respect for money or effort, as being sick seemed to them as some sort of personality defect.

With time, and a great deal of my wife defending me to her mother, she came around, though it took another year for her youngest brother to do the same.

Her other younger brother still despises me. His reasoning being that my wife and I could not get legally married, as i would lose my insurance, my disability, and my many connections with specific doctors that i need to survive.

He doesnt seem to understand that if i signed that marriage certificate, and my three separate insurances went under, i would need several million dollars yearly just to stay alive.

It caused a great rift between me and her side for a long time, though it seems to have settled for the most part. My family, however, has always been very accepting, and love my wife endlessly. They even joke that if i screw up, they are keeping her instead.

Don't know if this will help, but I hope it does.
 

soda_enby

Member
My parents had something similar, my mother was from the middle class because of her job and my father was very poor. He lived on the streets for the longest time after being kicked out and lived in a tiny, empty flat living paycheque to paycheque. My mother is very good with money and helped him out of poverty, and within two months they got married.

They really do love each other a lot, but my mother's family absolutely hate him (ironic coming from my grandparents as they are working class, but my aunt's family are middle class) and it's been passed onto me a little. I get ignored by my extended family in favour of my cousins and my mother gets verbal abuse from them for marrying and having a child with my father. However, my parents are still together (over 20 years now), they still love each other a lot and my father is a great parent. It's essentially just strengthened our familial bond more as we don't have anyone else, although I will note that celebrations like Christmas make my dad really depressed (especially his birthday) as it brings back bad memories of living on the street.

Just what I've seen of it, I do think it could really work. Hope that helps! :))
 

Hector

Senior Member
My wife of 41 years was from a higher class than me.

My parents were criminals and after their arrest I was put in juvenile hall (kid jail), then foster care, then I lived on the street selling illegal drugs. She was from a stable middle class family.

When we met I had worked my way through college and had a good job and was improving my life. the main problem we had was with her siblings, who thought I wasn’t good enough.

Oddly enough now we’re better off financially than than her family was and her siblings are now.


Man, you should turn this into a novel.
 

Foxee

Patron
Patron
My husband's family was maybe a little more well-to-do than mine but it wasn't a staggering difference. My experiences growing up in a rural area to subsistence homesteaders comes in handy sometimes when the money runs out. Having less can teach you how to make the best of things.

The bigger mismatch in financial status is between my extended family and ourselves, especially on my mother's side of the family. My mom and dad were the oddballs who wanted to live off the land (and preferably off the grid) instead of making a fortune. Her siblings all went for great careers, high esteem, and well-heeled spouses.

So all in all my husband and I are the poor relatives. On the good side of that we didn't have a dog in the fight when it came to the truly ugly battle over the family farm and my grandmother's money, etc. Sometimes it's a blessing to fly under the radar.

Don't know if this is helpful for you but it's a first-person perspective, anyway.
 

Llyralen

Senior Member
I knew a very happy girl around the age of 35 whose personality and looks combined were very attractive to most men. I watched her get blatantly flirted with a lot. She was happily married but she told me that her previous marriage was to a very rich guy who she said “I still love him— his spirit. His spirit was just amazing for me, but he was NOT into me.” I asked her more about it. She said “Nothing is exciting to that family. When you can just fly to Paris at a whim, then who cares about Paris? They even had pictures of themselves in the rain forest with wild gorillas. They were able to do amazing things but they did not look forward to anything. His grandma used to offer to pay me to play cards with her. I’d tell her ‘No, I will play cards with you for fun, because I want to.’ And that was so unheard of and different for them. That’s why he married me, because he knew I liked him for himself and it had nothing to do with money.” I asked her more. She said “One day I picked up the phone to make a phone call and this ballerina girl was talking to him and said ‘what are you doing with her anyway? You know you can have me.’ I heard him say “Yeah but... she actually likes me for me and I’ve never met anyone like that. She doesn’t even care about money.’ I listened to him talk some more to her about how into her he was. It became obvious he was NOT at ALL into me. I divorced him. It made me so sad. I still love him. “


So... that was interesting. The filthy rich and her. :)
 
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Gofa

Friends of WF
Hi
i find it difficult to judge what you are seeking
my first wife’s family considered themselves wealthy
i came from blue collar just enough food on the table
the thing with dealing with wealthy people is the sense of self entitlement
if they made the money okay there is a foundation of reality to them
if inherited oh dear they just deserve it all their birth right and ego and entitlement know no bounds
Those with money believe its the core of all righteousness and without it you dont amount to much if anything
their money redefines reality in their favour and all other are lesser by association
almost like racial prejudice an instant damnation look no further than the colour of their skin or wallet
acceptable servants but damn never an equal

my business career took me amongst the wealthy and perhaps soured my vision as few were happy

this saddened me you have everything and you are miserable oh dear you poor people
research the deceitfulness of wealth
those without it feel it promises all things
those with it means you get to worry about a whole new bunch of things
and the sad knowing that money wont fix everything and makes personal problems worse

by career and circumstances I am now much wealthier than my first wife’s family
funny to look at them
My view has not changed they are stilted in personal growth as money insulated them from having to face real challenges and growth To me they are poor dont enjoy wealth

my second wife grew up in Appalachians one dress no shoes
married well and divorced before meeting me in later life
Her story
learned to hide
what she was where she came from
and in Boston that she was of Cherokee lineage

to me racist tropes work just as good
think mixed race marriage and the problems it brings
but use money not skin colour

try having one character OCD from fear of never having enough
in the presence of wealth some people feel still poor

Hope this helps
one thing perhaps to use
you can have own wealth or wealth can have own you
each is very character defining
 
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