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Isolated (1 Viewer)

stuub27

Senior Member
The ancient art of eye contact
Is a ritual best observed
When the stars above align
In majestic complications

Within this hairline fracture in time
Resides a rare opportunity
For fears to fade and hopes to raise
The prospects of conversation

An isolated accident?
Or evidence of attraction?
Will gravity remain a law
When the world turns upside down?

The vast expanse of the unknown
Unfolds before me with a glance
Beckoned forth to face a future
Where the only thing certain is
 

happy-hippie

Senior Member
The first line kind of made me laugh--it's like eye contact existed back in time when dinosaurs roamed the earth. it sure does feel like that....

Overall, your poem reads to me like that rare moment in time when two eyes meet, and two worlds collide. In that one moment, anything becomes possible. There is an invitation to go forward... Perhaps you're speaking of love at first sight.

I enjoyed your poem and I think it's very well written.

Thank you for sharing.
 

stuub27

Senior Member
Thanks happy-hippie. Your reading of it is basically correct. It was inspired by a meeting of eyes- there's been a lot of that happening with all the Covid mask-wearing here and all. It didn't go anywhere, but, the thrill was still there.

Thanks for your comments. The first submission is always a bit daunting!
I'm enjoying this place, thanks to people like you. I'm off to do more reading!
 

rcallaci

Staff member
Administrator
The eyes are the window of the world- An excellant piece on the sensual aspects of eye contact.. I hope to read more of your poetry


warmest
bob
 

stuub27

Senior Member
Thanks rcallaci. Appreciated.

I must get around to more feedback for others. The process is anxiety provoking, but it's a skill to learn. And is just polite in a forum :)
 

Kain

Member
I liked this. I think it's skillfully written and it compelled me to take some time to consider your words, in a good way. Enjoyable and thought provoking.
 

Firemajic

Poetry Mentor
Staff member
Senior Mentor
Thanks rcallaci. Appreciated.

I must get around to more feedback for others. The process is anxiety provoking, but it's a skill to learn. And is just polite in a forum :)

I loved your poem... I would love to see you offering critique... here is why. You have a good understanding of what works ... I know because I have read your work... here is the best reason for critiquing, you will learn to scrutinize every word, and how it fits, and you will learn how to read and UNDERSTAND poetry...I think you have a lot to offer... and of course, other poets love critique... they NEED critique... so, don't be shy, give it a try ;)
 

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