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Is this beat too convenient for my detective? (1 Viewer)

Joker

Senior Member
Let me give y'all the necessary background for this question.

During his missing persons case, my protagonist, Corrit, ends up staking out a mob-owned nightclub. These mob guys are all outcasts from their species' empire, just like Corrit, so naturally Corrit ends up picking a fight with one of them after he has a little too much to drink. Let's just call the guy he fights with X for now. Corrit starts whooping X's ass, causing X to demand that Ember, the robot bouncer, toss him out. Unfortunately for X, Corrit is about the only person on the planet that's been nice to her, so she tells him to pound sand. That doesn't go over very well for her, so the mob hits her remote off switch. Corrit gets done beating up X and hightails it out of there with Ember in tow.

Corrit takes Ember to a doctor he knows who can work on robots too, isn't sci-fi great? Doc gets to work rebooting Ember's systems, and quickly realizes there's a bunch of dirt on the mob that was haphazardly purged. He jots some of this down on (gasp) actual physical paper, figuring Corrit might want it. He is then promptly murdered by X, who does a rather good job of cleaning up the mess. No body, he bleaches Doc's computer, the works. He just forgets that paper is still a thing in the 41st century. So Corrit finds those papers, and advances the plot closer to the end.

All that said... is the whole paper thing a little too convenient?
 

Steve_Rivers

Senior Member
I agree with Mark, it works fine if handled well. I'd imagine if you threw in a fact that the doctor is a local or knows about the mob then it would totally make sense that he realizes what he finds is important and so would jot it down.
 

Joker

Senior Member
I agree with Mark, it works fine if handled well. I'd imagine if you threw in a fact that the doctor is a local or knows about the mob then it would totally make sense that he realizes what he finds is important and so would jot it down.

He doesn't just know them, he's worked on them before.
 
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