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I Need Help (Alcohol Intervention) (1 Viewer)

The Green Shield

WF Veterans
So yeah... I think I may have an alcohol problem. While I can mostly contain it during the week, it unleashes itself on Friday night and I end up drinking WAY more than I should (I...drank four beers last night.) As a result, I failed my family once again, and I failed myself. I’d say “sorry” or “I’ll do better” but at this point, I’m not sure if even I believe it. The words sound so hollow... I’ve said that too many times before. And I know what's gonna happen -- after this thread, I'll eventually forget how I feel and the cycle will, once again, repeat itself.

I got wild because I had a great day (cold aside) and wanted to celebrate it...and that’s when the alcohol got unleashed. I need help.
 

Pluralized

Black Dracula
WF Veterans
So yeah... I think I may have an alcohol problem. While I can mostly contain it during the week, it unleashes itself on Friday night and I end up drinking WAY more than I should (I...drank four beers last night.) As a result, I failed my family once again, and I failed myself. I’d say “sorry” or “I’ll do better” but at this point, I’m not sure if even I believe it. The words sound so hollow... I’ve said that too many times before. And I know what's gonna happen -- after this thread, I'll eventually forget how I feel and the cycle will, once again, repeat itself.

I got wild because I had a great day (cold aside) and wanted to celebrate it...and that’s when the alcohol got unleashed. I need help.

You've got company, friend. Been doing that very dance for twenty five years m'self. I'm six months off 'er (again) and this time sought help in the form of a high-powered psychologist who gave me many techniques for dealing with urges to drink. I have employed these techniques many times since learning them. It was the memory of the last hangover which motivated me for the longest time, but as that memory fades I find the urges are more potent.

Four beers for me would be four pints of 10% microbrew, and probably six or eight would be more likely. I liked to push the edge of a heady buzz to the point where it meets full-on blackout drunkenness. Life's hard, it gets monotonous and boring and sobriety is dull, but the sparkling clarity of it contrasts nicely to the muddy incoherence of my alcoholic brain.

Good luck mate - reach out via PM if you'd like to talk. Been through a lot with that brown lady and she's not always kind, especially as the years stack on. I am happy to offer whatever support I can, if it's helpful.
 

Phil Istine

WF Veterans
So yeah... I think I may have an alcohol problem. While I can mostly contain it during the week, it unleashes itself on Friday night and I end up drinking WAY more than I should (I...drank four beers last night.) As a result, I failed my family once again, and I failed myself. I’d say “sorry” or “I’ll do better” but at this point, I’m not sure if even I believe it. The words sound so hollow... I’ve said that too many times before. And I know what's gonna happen -- after this thread, I'll eventually forget how I feel and the cycle will, once again, repeat itself.

I got wild because I had a great day (cold aside) and wanted to celebrate it...and that’s when the alcohol got unleashed. I need help.

Sorry to hear that you have a problem. Although four beers won't sound a lot to some, it's not about the quantity but about what they do to you physically, emotionally, and mentally.
It can be beaten. I had a terrible problem for years, and it didn't stop with alcohol. It's been over thirty-one years since I had a drink or a fix or - anything. I did it with AA, NA, and one-to-one therapy. That's not for everyone and I don't agree with all the philosophies myself. But I picked up enough on the way for long-term abstinence and to feel more comfortable in my own skin. And I suppose that's as much as an old junkie/alkie can wish for really.
Maybe go and have a chat with a counsellor who specialises in the field. If cost is an issue, it's usually possible to do it via a charity and have fees reduced on a sliding scale. You've nothing to lose except counselling fees - and you'll probably save much of that by not drinking.
 

-xXx-

Financial Supporter
substance abuse/dual diagnosis has significant
social attention.
some communities offer peer support services
and warm lines at no cost.
several academic institutions offer very inexpensive
($10/hr) community counseling sessions with
practicum students overseen by PHD faculty.

i would ask you what connects you to your personal joy.
then I would suggest that any single focus that
becomes "celebration" can be redefined by you.
if you enjoy the company of the place you go
to celebrate, perhaps some of those individuals
would be open to going somewhere else and
celebrating differently.
perhaps instead of the local bar, going to a
non-alcohol café for conversation and tacos.

if the impetus is stretching the good-feeling-time
between work and home, perhaps an agreement
for delayed arrival (stopping for a walk around a
park, or the like) might be considered.

according to the ages of children or other dependents,
making arrangements to meet your spouse and
share the new celebration could be beneficial
on several fronts.

i think you get the idea.

best wishes,
:)
 

SueC

Staff member
Senior Mentor
If you are saying "I need help," then do that . . . get help. Alcoholism (if that's what it is) is a confusing, complicated disease. It doesn't really matter if some people think 4 beers is not so much, or too much - what matters is that you think that way. You see it as not appropriate. My parents were both alcoholic, but because it was of a different generation, they didn't have a lot of insight as to why they drank. In this day and age, we know there are a lot of reasons why some people consistently drink more than they should - loneliness, stress at work, stress of family, lost goals, disappointments in life, and so on. You can find alternatives, you can find coping methods, all sorts of techniques - but you need to seek the help of a professional who can give you specific aid.

The fact that you get through the week without drinking, and hit it hard only on the weekends tells me that this may not be as serious a problem as you think. Please, talk to someone you trust about how you are feeling before any more time goes on. I'll be thinking of you.
 

Jack of all trades

Senior Member
This is a case of taking care of yourself is also taking care of your family. You can get counseling or join a support group, like Alcoholics Anonymous. Remember the physical aspects, too. I read once that certain B vitamin deficiency is a contributing factor in alcoholism, and some ethnic groups lack an enzyme required to process alcohol, so they become alcoholics quite easily. Changing an aspect of your lifestyle can be difficult, but the key is persistence.

A friend who no longer smokes uses an interesting approach. She doesn't say that she's quit smoking, only that it's been years since her last cigarette. She just delays the next one. I don't know if that would work for you, but thought I'd share it.
 

Winston

WF Veterans
Thanks for sharing. I used to work in a 12 Step facility. I will not be giving any advice.
This is on you. You know what needs to be fixed. You can find the support and resources.

In the most sincerest terms, I wish you luck. I also wish you courage. You'll need both.
 

Ralph Rotten

Staff member
Media Manager
Were these four beers 40 ounces each?

4 regular sized beers ain't bad. When you throw away the cap to a fresh bottle of Smirnoff because you don't need it no more, then you may have a problem.

But if you have the capacity to realize that you have a drinking problem, then you also have the capacity to fix it. However, I am the last person in the world to tell you how to do that.
 

-xXx-

Financial Supporter
sounds like a good substitution choice.
if you can build on that with a couple more
that work for you, it can help ghost the
path toward undesirable and/or less desirable
choice(s)/behavior(s).

kudos!
 

Ralph Rotten

Staff member
Media Manager
I always found that the best way to understand addiction is to think of it as a romantic mistress because for all intents & purposes that's how you treat it. You know she's bad for you, but the heart wants what the heart wants.
 

The Green Shield

WF Veterans
For the past few nights I've been waking up...emotional. The dreams (if I had any) weren't scary or tragic...I'd just wake up with a heaving chest and a spinning mind. The fact this started right when I cut off from the alcohol, a week in, cannot be just a coincidence...
 

-xXx-

Financial Supporter
it could be a coincidence.
if you are experiencing stress(s)
AND
not using alcohol to self-medicate,
then
cause-effect can become more direct.

experiencing emotion can provide a number of personal positives,
usually over time.
sleep deprivation needs to be addressed.
people need sleep.

be well with yourself.
 
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