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Heralding commercial success from last year, or the year before, or 2019 (1 Viewer)

Matchu

Senior Member
Of all the 7 billion poems I ever crafted in an attic - this is my one commercial success, a victory, a victory for concision, dunno, maybe. Some kind of on-line scene where the winners are published upon street furniture. I present for you my poem that appeared on a bus stop in London. Or they said it did, I never went to London. It must have been seen by somebody?

Dishwasher Pilot

Take a tablet
take the heat
Mind the blades
Lift your feet
 
I like S1 L2 as it paints an image for me, why would anyone need to mind the blades? Unless there is a knife buried beneath all that soap. You also should put some punctuation in there but some poems don't have any. But for me, I need one. Also why a tablet? For what?
 

Matchu

Senior Member
I believe the published version had several commas and a ‘period.’ If you had ever flown a dishwasher you would be aware the blades sweep the void spraying jets of scalding water. They are called blades otherwise my poem is nonsense. Same rules apply re tablet of detergent. Thank you for admiration of line 2.
 

knottla

Senior Member
Hey you're not joking about those blades, I had to swiftly move my feet, it was that close I felt the draught off them. I enjoyed reading your poem Matchu.
 
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