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English Language and Literature Creative Writing Essay (1 Viewer)

funkwolf

Senior Member
Forty percent of my exam points are gained by writing a short creative writing essay.

The rules are to base the short story around the novel called The Woman in White and theme the story around identity. If it would not be too much to ask, it would help me greatly if you were to go over the first draft I have written and tell me of mistakes I have made and areas in which it could be improved. I'm not looking for complete rewrites, but just tips on how this may be improved to a higher standard.

Thank you for your time.


English Creative Writing Essay Practice



I am writing this entry to tell of my late brother's demise. My brother, Jonathan Hartright, had a fascination with our family's history and because of this he spent a lot of time researching the ancestors of our family, in particular Walter Hartright, who had founded the family after the Hartrights gained ownership of Fairlie manor, in Limmeridge, by marrying into the Fairlie bloodline. Due to his great interest in our family history, my brother often spent his time riffling through old documents and diaries and on a number of occasions travelling abroad.

If I were to guess why my brother took such a strong liking to Walter Haright it would be because Jonathan simply adored someone who could change his identity to suit a given purpose. After all Walter started off as a little known artist, before becoming a sort of detective in order to combat a man known as Count Fosco and then Walter finished his story by becoming a nobleman after marrying into the Fairlie bloodline. This without a doubt was my brother's favourite story as a child, a story that lead to my brother's historical profession and liking of our family history. However not everything is known about Walter's identity, since some things were kept hidden even from our oldest family members and as such, not everything is known about Walter Hartright. However two years ago in the autumn of 1989 my brother received a letter. It read as follows.

'Dear Jonathan Hartright

I am writing to you to tell you something of great importance to your family, it has come to my attention that your family's darkest secret is unbeknown to you. Due to it being such a dark secret, I believe it is in your greatest interest to document this secret for the safety of others. I understand if you do not wish to take upon this objective, as it puts your family at risk; however, if you do wish to know more about your family's dark secret, then read the document attached below and come to Vatican city next year on November 21st and visit the secret achieves at noon.


You will find that you have access to the achieves. I will arrive to guide you to the document.

Yours Sincerely, a friend.'

Beneath the letter another document was attached. It was written by Professor Pesca, a great friend of Walter Hartright before Pesca was killed, according to Jonathan, and it was addressed to a group only referred to as 'The Brotherhood' whom, once again according to Jonathan, had caused the untimely demise of Professor Pesca. Upon hearing this I sensed danger for my brother immediately and begged him not to go. But I knew he would not listen to me when I saw the light in his eyes, so I helped him to prepare for November 23rd 1990, the date of my brother's impending death.

My brother left on November the 22nd in order to be there early, I knew there was no stopping him now, so I sat and waited; a couple of days later I received a letter in the post. It read as follows

'Dear Sister

You would not believe the knowledge that has been unearthed Alice, after meeting up with the mysterious man at the Vatican achieves we began to search threw documents on The Brotherhood. What once started out as a secret and elite guard for The Borgias soon grew into a very dangerous secret organization of assassins. The main agenda of this organization is to assure success of certain figures into the status of pope, this secret of corruption is very dangerous and would cause a violent upheaval if word got out that not a single pope since the time of The Borgias had been elected fairly. Because of this, The Brotherhood are very secretive and stop at nothing to keep their identity a secret, in truth the reason why this secret was revealed to the Hartright family was because our family had already documented The Brotherhood due to Walter Hartright, which makes us more credible and also makes us untouchable if word got out. Which is why the next thing I tell you is very important, over the next few days you will be receiving a large number of parchments and documents at random times. When you receive all of them immediately collect all of our documents on Walter Hartright and deliver them to Lord Fairfax, he'll know what to go with them. When this is done, return home and lock the house until my arrival or as the case may be, the police, do not open the door to anyone else no matter the circumstances. I will be arriving home shortly.

With best wishes, Jonathan.'

My brother died the same day the letter was received, which is why I have written this entry to not only tell of my brother's passing but to bring to light the cruel people that had been hiding in the shadows and to finally close the story of Walter Hartright once and for all.
 
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