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Drinking to die (1 Viewer)

MrLightening

Senior Member
Here is a story I wrote yesterday. It's a how to guide from an embittered alcoholic.

DRINKING TO DIE by MrLightening

The one thing you never hear about alcohol is that it’s an art. And I’m not talking about the brewers and distillers pumping the **** out for our glasses. I’m talking about the drinkers. And I’m not talking about the ones who are drinking for fun. I’m talking about the real drinkers who are drinking to live. These are the fallen artists of our time, putting in hours and hours into a craft that will never be fully appreciated. Hell even the fifteen year old on work experience in McDonalds at least earns five dollars a day. What is there for you, true drinker? What is there for you once you reach the top of your game?



Any feedback would be great. I'm a serious writer and I will look at anyone's work if they look at mine. Thank you
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The Hawk

Senior Member
I see that you have not received any form of comment on this short story, and I wonder why.

I think it is a great piece of writing - with the exception of one phrase (I'll come back to that later).

What I see here is a broken man; a lonely man. Someone who has lost something. Perhaps his wife, or children, or both, his job and his inability to cope with life. He is also, probably an educated man, We do not know - and that is the beauty of the piece. It leaves the reader asking questions as to the how and why. It is well done.

I have only two suggestions for this piece:-

1 - delete the piece with reference to McDonalds - it does not add anything to the story.

2 - insert a short piece as to where this is - a park bench in the dead of night or something similar.

Well done!
 

MrLightening

Senior Member
Wow, thanks man. I submitted this when I first joined the website and included a link to the full story which got removed. I might as well just submit the entire thing hey :). Those comments are pretty good too. I agree with both of them to an extent. Strange... this piece has had mixed reaction. The majority of people who have read it, love it, but one person described it as souless, and I'm actually more inclined to agree that critic. Anyway, here's the full thing:

DRINKING TO DIE
The one thing you never hear about alcohol is that it’s an art. And I’m not talking about the brewers and distillers pumping the shit out for our glasses. I’m talking about the drinkers. And I’m not talking about the ones who are drinking for fun. I’m talking about the real drinkers who are drinking to live. These are the fallen artists of our time, putting in hours and hours into a craft that will never be fully appreciated. Hell even the fifteen year old on work experience in McDonalds at least earns five dollars a day. What is there for you, true drinker? What is there for you once you reach the top of your game?
I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me. With alcohol I’ve never blamed the drink for when things go bad. Blame the drinker. Only someone who doesn’t know what it’s like to be intoxicated twelve hours a day everyday will take pity on you drinker. Unfortunately that might be a lot of people. And as much as I want to take all the non-drinkers of the world and paint yellow stars on their shoulders whilst making them walk along the gutter towards the train, I must remember that I was a non-drinker too.
We all were.
Good news is there’s still time for a conversion. We may have to hurry things, but with a little luck we’ll get you on your way to drinking to live. Let us start with our first drinks. Go on, do not be shy. It’s not going to bite you. Just walk into the bottle shop and pay for your liquor. I prefer to start with beer myself. But maybe you’ll prefer something sweeter. Something mixed with soft drink. Vodka and orange might be the way to go. Vodka and raspberry and vodka and lemon might also go down well. Or, if you’re feeling adventurous,
Then just the ****ing vodka by itself
You’ve got to be adventurous when it comes to your drinking. Every night it will be a new experience. No doubt on your first drink you may have an alright time. Perhaps you will surround yourself with people you know. Perhaps they’ll be some people you don’t know. Whether it’s a new boy or girl that catches your eye, throw down a shot of vodka before you make that first contact. And don’t thank the vodka when they put their hand to yours, don’t thank the vodka when the pants come down and the tongues caress
Thank yourself.
You drank your first drink and you should be proud. This first drink is the first step towards becoming a full time drinker. The first step to making a career out of it. And I’m not talking about getting so drunk you accidently put a car full of your mates into a tree at 150. I’m talking about taking a drink to make yourself more important.
After drink number one, you’re probably not going to feel very good. You may even feel regret. It’s always important to remember with drinking that yesterday is more important than today. It’s a philosophy a good drinker lives by. You may have a headache now, but last night you fell in love. You may have to vomit, but last night you had an orgasm. You may be covered in dirt, semen, ****, seaweed, alcohol and sand, but last night it seemed like a good idea.
Remember always. You did what you thought was right at the time. Don’t argue with your past self. It’s an argument you cannot win. And today you might not feel like drinking. But yesterday you did. And tomorrow you will. Because life isn’t going to get any better after alcohol. It only gets better when you’re on alcohol. The idea is to be on alcohol at all times. Remember this is what makes you cool. This is what makes you important and better than all the non-drinkers. Soon it will be time to line them up in the sand, and behead them one by one.
By drink two, you’re no longer sober. By drink two you’re tipsy. This doesn’t make you an alcoholic. This just makes you no longer a virgin. The drug is in your system. It will stay there for quite some time. It’s like any relationship. The more you feed it, the more it will grow. By drink two you will be looking forward to it. Drink one makes you realize how shit sober life is. Drink one makes you wake up. Drink one makes you fantasize about your nostalgia to the point it becomes a constant driving force within you. You find yourself writing about it. Talking about it. Thinking about it. When you go to bed at night, you will dream you are there. At the party. Behind the bottle. Behind the boy or girl. It’s a dream that lasts forever. It’s a dream you swear you’ll live again.
Welcome to our gang. Drink two makes you one of us. This might not be the greatest night of your life, but it sure will be the second greatest. It will be everything like drink one, except not as good. It will be repetitive. It will be introductory. It will make you feel as though you are just getting adjusted to a new house you’ve moved into. They call this the tipsy phase. Drink two is your apprenticeship.
Like any apprenticeship, you can expect it to last for exactly one year. One year of doing the rounds. One year of getting used to the route. You will surely learn certain things. You will learn that mixing vodka and bourbon will give you a hangover. You will learn that a night drinking beer is a soft night. You will learn that a night drinking bourbon is a hard night. You will learn a night with beer and bourbon is a good night.
You will learn there are two parts to you. The sober you. And the drunk you. The drunk you is the real you. The drunk you is the one where you can say whatever you want and behave in anyway you please. I’m not talking about accidentally finger ****ing your daughter instead of your wife. I’m talking about being the life of the party.
After you’ve finished your apprentice you will no longer be tipsy. You will be drunk. Flat out full time pissed. It’s a good feeling you know. An even better place to be. Being drunk means certain things have to change about you. Being drunk means you don’t just drink on the weekends. Being drunk means you drink everyday. Drinking everyday is a good thing to do. Drinking everyday will change the way you think and feel. It will change everything about your way of life. In the mornings you will be sick, headachey, constipated. In the nights you will be adrenalin fueled, euphoric, happy. The cons of drinking are in balance with the benefits. Sickness in exchange for a life worth living. It’s important to remember that if you were a non-drinker you would be dead by now.
And so your career begins. May it last many long years. You will come to learn over time that you become a better drinker. The longer you do something the better you get at it. In later years the product of your drinking will be one of art. Young drinkers all over the world will come to hear your stories. You will be able to tell them all the highs and lows. All the adventures and wonders of the night you saw and experienced. I’m not talking about raising your children to be alcoholics. I’m talking about being a cool dad.
You can tell them what an art drinking to die is.
You can tell them why they should never start.
 
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