Have you ever wondered about death? Thought about it? I have always looked at people who feared death or who mourned the dead with a sense of wonder and puzzlement. Life no longer holds any joy for me. I am young and yet I am old. I am in pain. And every waking second I feel like falling over, crying, screaming to the skies. Yet Death calms me. I have no fear of death. I hide nothing from death. I have wanted it so long now that I have no secrets from it and it no secrets from me. So many times while lying there in pain or walking about trying to pretend like I am fine, I have explored death and what it is and what it means. To me it is a release from misery. It is a graduation from life moving on to whatever is next. Some people may find me weird that I am comfortable with death. Yet I feel as if it is just something that happens naturally. Something that we should never fear or step away from. It is something that will happen sooner or later. So why hide yourself from something that will happen no matter what you do. Why not welcome it with open arms. Wait for it to come to you so that you can introduce yourself by name saying now is my time and I am content. This is how I feel. Maybe someday life will change and I will be happy again. I am not talking about the occasional happiness when you get a good grade or go play basketball or get a smile from a beautiful woman. I am talking about when you are truly happy. Yet if that time does come before my death, still will I always appreciate death and understand it and its necessity. Not only that but I will welcome it with my arms open and my heart and mind extended, embracing it all enveloping warmness. I am not emo. I am not a devil worshipper. I am just content with the idea that my life will be at an end and I am al the more content with the faster that it is over.