I Wanted The Farmhouse To Have Personality


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Thread: I Wanted The Farmhouse To Have Personality

  1. #1

    I Wanted The Farmhouse To Have Personality

    I realised I'd not actually described the farmhouse in Apparition quite a while ago and now I've decided to add it in. What I want though is for it to have a personality rather than it just being a building. I've kept detail at a minimum because I intend to weave a little of that detail into other scenes when appropriate. This represents just a couple of passes mainly aimed at tightening but I feel it aint bad. What do you think? I've put it just after Arthur looks out of the bedroom window and just before Sarah joins him there.

    As beautiful as Eldmoore valley was, it hadn’t been the deciding factor. That had been the farmhouse itself. If the heavens threw all it had at the valley, even when everything else was raised to the ground, this little bully of a building would still be standing. ‘Cosy’ had been the descriptive in the brochure but when viewing, Arthur thought ‘bulldog’ more apt. A resolute stone guard.

    Every room was minimalist and functional, the narrow stairs and landing underlined this build philosophy. The choppy, thick brickwork and woodwork solidified it even further. Cool to the touch and solid to a knuckle.

    Sarah fell in love with the kitchen stroke living room, with its extended worktop partitioning the two halves. Both loved the woodwork, cut roughly, battered and scratched but smoothed as if hauled from the sea a millennia ago. The flagstone floor and queen posts with cross beams above brought the whole thing together, and at night, when the wall lights were lit, shadows criss-crossed the V of the gable ceiling.
    Craft / Draft / Graft And Write To Entertain.

  2. #2
    What's the architecture style?

    I know this is Europe, but when I describe American homes I always mention if they are Georgian, Federalist, etc.

    I like the description of the interior decoration and the woodwork. "as if hauled from the sea a millennia ago" was evocative.

    Not sure why you're calling the house a "bully." That invokes a negative emotion.

  3. #3
    Very beautiful visual! It's the type of place I dream of. You can't find them in Canada. My husband is from England, so we visit the Uk often. My nephew and his wife took an old stone house in Cornwall and completely renovated it. It started off a lot like your description.

    This building works well with your story, she being an artist would relish living in this type of minimalist romantic setting. Just one thing that popped out. When you describe the "worktop", at first I thought it was a typo. But on second read I realized it is a kitchen island. (That's what we call them in NA) It works, but just wondering about the audience. Also, I LOVE the concept of the cross beams in the shadows. But wasn't sure when you said "above", where that is.

    But good work...this is my type of read!

    Last edited by Taylor; April 9th, 2021 at 09:01 PM.
    Sometimes in the waves of change we find our new direction...
    - unknown

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by EternalGreen View Post
    What's the architecture style?

    I know this is Europe, but when I describe American homes I always mention if they are Georgian, Federalist, etc.

    I like the description of the interior decoration and the woodwork. "as if hauled from the sea a millennia ago" was evocative.

    Not sure why you're calling the house a "bully." That invokes a negative emotion.
    Bully in the context I'm suggesting means stubborn, unyielding. But it also represents Arthur, who's stubborn and unyielding

    Quote Originally Posted by Taylor View Post
    Very beautiful visual! It's the type of place I dream of. You can't find them in Canada. My husband is from England, so we visit the Uk often. My nephew and his wife took an old stone house in Cornwall and completely renovated it. It started off a lot like your description.

    This building works well with your story, she being an artist would relish living in this type of minimalist romantic setting. Just one thing that popped out. When you describe the "worktop", at first I thought it was a typo. But on second read I realized it is a kitchen island. (That's what we call them in NA) It works, but just wondering about the audience. Also, I LOVE the concept of the cross beams in the shadows. But wasn't sure when you said "above", where that is.

    But good work...this is my type of read!

    Yeah, I'll have to do some research to see if there's a British equivalent of 'kitchen island'. It just sounded too modern for my needs but, like I said, this is pretty much hot off the press and may change a little more yet. I'm sticking with British English for now. If I'm lucky enough to get anything published, then perhaps I'll write for a bigger audience, which is American English. I'm stubborn and unyielding though ...
    Craft / Draft / Graft And Write To Entertain.

  5. #5
    Little typo "razed" instead of "raised" in this case.

    "kitchen stroke living room"? I'm confused.

    "Bully" is a little unusual but makes sense in context especially when followed by "bulldog".

    Unfamiliar with some of the terms like 'queen posts' and I'm guessing without being certain that lumber was "pulled from the sea" because that's how it was transported? Or am I not seeing something that's obvious because I'm tired? Neither thing would be an issue for me reading this, though, it all rolls along in context pretty well.
    What comes after the NaPo storm of poetry?
    Get ready for the
    May 2021 Collaborator Challenge.

    Send your potential partner a fruit basket and start begging!

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Foxee View Post
    Little typo "razed" instead of "raised" in this case.

    "kitchen stroke living room"? I'm confused.

    "Bully" is a little unusual but makes sense in context especially when followed by "bulldog".

    Unfamiliar with some of the terms like 'queen posts' and I'm guessing without being certain that lumber was "pulled from the sea" because that's how it was transported? Or am I not seeing something that's obvious because I'm tired? Neither thing would be an issue for me reading this, though, it all rolls along in context pretty well.
    'Kitchen/living room'. I need to rewrite that bit I think. 'as if' pulled from the sea. Not literally pulled from the sea. I might change it to king post. It's the one I was thinking of:

    Craft / Draft / Graft And Write To Entertain.

  7. #7
    Nice, I like the King post idea. I didn't know enough architecture but pictures help.
    What comes after the NaPo storm of poetry?
    Get ready for the
    May 2021 Collaborator Challenge.

    Send your potential partner a fruit basket and start begging!

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by Foxee View Post
    Nice, I like the King post idea. I didn't know enough architecture but pictures help.
    It's research! Yes, I did some! Yey ... (I hate it). Before I give this the final passes, I'm going to read up on farming. I'm really not looking forward to it.
    Craft / Draft / Graft And Write To Entertain.

  9. #9
    Quote Originally Posted by TheMightyAz View Post
    'Kitchen/living room'. I need to rewrite that bit I think. 'as if' pulled from the sea. Not literally pulled from the sea. I might change it to king post. It's the one I was thinking of:

    Oh now that makes more sense with the crosses "above". I get it! I was thinking before that the queen posts where on the island or on the banister.
    Sometimes in the waves of change we find our new direction...
    - unknown

  10. #10
    i think it works well, AZ. Being a country boy myself I pictured a black stove with kindling lying next to it.

    There were a few things that caught my eye and instead of Both loved the woodwork, cut roughly, I would use: woodwork rough sawn.

    The gable always grabs me as an external feature.. the wall lights were lit, shadows criss-crossed the V of the gable ceiling...Maybe say.. cast shadows of the large beams.
    One other was the wall lights could be gas lights to give it more of an old time feel.

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