This Woman


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Thread: This Woman

  1. #1

    This Woman

    This Woman

    This woman trips into me,
    hair licks a hungry neck,
    her legs the distance between
    the floor and what I want,
    her eyes the opiate
    the till, the change.

    Fingers flutter like moths
    about the snap of a purse...
    Eyes searching,
    smile welcoming

    'Hello,' I say

    'Didn't I see you earlier?'
    lips slip, stumbling over the truth,
    each letter uttered with sweet guile,
    mouth left parted a tooth width --
    my wallet flip,
    the contract,
    signed.

    I breath an hour into her ear,
    an apple with the pips nipped,
    leaving the sweetness not the mud.
    she sinks knowingly,
    eased by familiarity,
    cradled in a moment
    lived before.

  2. #2
    Easy read. Very Smooth Flow. I like the rhythm.
    Seduction? I am not a professional so i'm just sharing my impressions: I see a prostitute doing her job. In case you're wondering, 'the wallet flipped', and the contract was signed- a passionate description of somthing mechanical(?) Am I way off?
    I tried...

  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by TheMightyAz View Post
    This Woman


    This woman trips into me,
    hair licks a hungry neck,
    her legs the distance between
    the floor and what I want,
    her eyes the opiate
    the till, the change.

    Fingers flutter like moths
    about the snap of a purse...
    Eyes searching,
    smile welcoming

    'Hello,' I say

    'Didn't I see you earlier?'
    lips slip, stumbling over the truth,
    each letter uttered with sweet guile,
    mouth left parted a tooth width --
    my wallet flip,
    the contract,
    signed.

    I breath an hour into her ear,
    an apple with the pips nipped,
    leaving the sweetness not the mud.
    she sinks knowingly,
    eased by familiarity,
    cradled in a moment
    lived before.
    What a way to make a dramatic entrance !!!! Welcome to the fabulous Poet's Showcase

    This poem is everything I love about poetry... unique and original...
    you are skilled at leaving much unsaid, giving this powerful poem a sense of intrigue and mystery...Your opening stanza is fierce and a story all on its own...thank you for sharing
    She lost herself in the trees,
    among the ever-changing leaves.
    She wept beneath the wild sky
    as stars told stories of ancient times.
    The flowers grew toward her light,
    the river called her name at night.
    She could not live an ordinary life,
    with the mysteries of the universe
    hidden in her eyes....
    Author: Christy Ann Martine

    Death leaves a heartache no one can heal,
    love leaves a memory no one can steal....
    Author unknown.

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by happy-hippie View Post
    Easy read. Very Smooth Flow. I like the rhythm.
    Seduction? I am not a professional so i'm just sharing my impressions: I see a prostitute doing her job. In case you're wondering, 'the wallet flipped', and the contract was signed- a passionate description of somthing mechanical(?) Am I way off?
    I tried...
    Some people crave love and are willing to pay with their soul to find it. They do not know the difference between a one night stand and well earned admiration. We all pay if we get it wrong ...

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by TheMightyAz View Post
    Some people crave love and are willing to pay with their soul to find it. They do not know the difference between a one night stand and well earned admiration. We all pay if we get it wrong ...
    ahhh! reads even better with understanding. Thanks for giving me some insight.

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by TheMightyAz View Post
    Some people crave love and are willing to pay with their soul to find it. They do not know the difference between a one night stand and well earned admiration. We all pay if we get it wrong ...
    Wow!!! what a level of sensitivity. That distinguished observation of sensitivity, really makes a poet, a poet.
    Keep writing.
    Good luck
    Ritu

  7. #7

    I agree with most of the above. I can see the her
    and the moment.... good rhythm and flow.
    Nice read thx
    •~~•~~•~~•~~•~~•~~•
    ‘Every man is guilty
    of all the good he did not do’

    Voltaire

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