First of all I was not sure on where to place this thread, therefore please let me know if that is the case.

One of the issues I think most of all writers find difficulty is in writing descriptive scenes without boring the reader, or oneself. I am a firm believer in practice makes perfect, and thinking how supportive this forum is, what a better place to hone descriptive writing than here?

To maximise the results of this thread, I think it is a good idea to at least provide feedback on the scene that was posted by the last user, off course the more feedback the scenes receive, the better the writing will be.

So rules:
1. Read the scene of the last user and write a feedback.
2. Write a descriptive scene of your liking to receive feedback.
3. At the end you are welcome to add a prompt for the next user to write based on your idea (this is an option but one I highly encourage)

Quite easy right?

(Ideas on how to improve this thread are welcomed!)


By the time we arrived at the bottom of the mountain, we were soaked to the bone. The hike that was supposed to last one hour, turned to seven with the sudden arrival of the snowfall, little by little, as the seconds passed, what was once a green field turned to white. Our walk became slow and heavy, sometimes I even wondered if that morning I wore bricks for shoes instead of my usual water proof boots, my aching feet could barely move another step when our teacher, sarcastically said: "we are almost there!".

I bit my tongue so hard, I am surprised I didn't draw blood, we were already lost so I wondered how on earth would this woman know if we are close or not!, everywhere I could see was white, the tracks were long lost and our backs were bending from the added weight. We walked and walked, the snow was so tall it reached our knees, it took humongous effort just to take one single step.

Kyle, bless his sense of humour and quick thinking, began to sing like military cadences to keep our minds from getting tired. We were from different backgrounds, and the only one, I think, was fit enough to resist this sudden bootcamp, that I did not sign up for if I may say, was him. He always had this flavour for life, saying funny comments here and there to make the atmosphere cheerful and amenable. He took the lead and with the rhythm of a band we marched.

"Mama just killed a man" he sang and we chuckled at his choice of song. We were not familiar with any army cadences like Kyle, but Queen was one of the favourites of the whole trip.

"Put a gun against his head, pulled my trigger now he is dead" we sang completely out of tune with a better mood.

I will never forget that moment, seven foreigners stranded in one of the many forests Japan had to offer, singing loud whilst walking down the mountain. I wonder if the wildlife was so scared by our high pitched voices they dared not to come out of their dwellings, well, that or it was hibernation season, at least there was no one around to record our amazing voices, that would have been embarrassing.

Five queen songs later, and a couple of stories from Kyle and we finally arrived at our destination, I believe heaven took pity on us because right in front of us there was a red big sign with the writing of "ramen". It was a perfect contrast against the white field that extended for miles upon miles. The scent of freshly cooked broth and the steam coming out of the small restaurant invigorated our bodies to do a last quick run.

"Welcome" the chef and his wife yelled with a merry tune and a happy face, I chocked on my words and kept my tears at bay. From the corner of my eyes I saw Milho and Jenny sniffing, and even the masculine Kyle and our grumpy teacher had red eyes, or maybe it was my imagination, nevertheless I had never been so happy to see a pair of strangers smiling at me, perhaps we had arrived in some kind of heaven that one of the many Japanese tales talked about.

Thank you for reading and hope you enjoy this little thread.

For the next user: Describe the moment you felt the happiest in your life.