Speech sentences confusion - Page 2


Page 2 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast
Results 11 to 20 of 33

Thread: Speech sentences confusion

  1. #11
    Member Sir-KP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2018
    Location
    Indonesia
    Posts
    295
    Ah... Such a classic speech topic. This is great, because the more I think of it, the more I'm confused.

    I have a question that in some speech, sometimes instead of comma, people put full stop.

    Why and what is the reason to put full stop (or exclamation mark, for example) instead of comma?

    Like example above. It's: "Hello," said John.

    Why not: "Hello!" said John.

    "Dumbass," said Jane would be less impactful than "Dumbass!" said Jane.


    Sorry for hijacking the thread a little, but hopefully can enrich the topic.
    Last edited by Sir-KP; July 1st, 2019 at 02:55 AM. Reason: for clarity

  2. #12
    Quote Originally Posted by Sir-KP View Post
    Ah... Such a classic speech topic. This is great, because the more I think of it, the more I'm confused.

    I have a question that in some speech, sometimes instead of comma, people put full stop.

    Why and what is the reason to put full stop instead of comma?



    Like example above. It's: "Hello," said John.

    Why not: "Hello!" said John.

    "Dumbass," said Jane would be less impactful than "Dumbass!" said Jane.


    Sorry for hijacking the thread a little, but hopefully can enrich the topic.
    You answered your own question in a roundabout way. When the dialogue is a question, or an exclamation, the appropriate punctuation mark is used because to wait until after the tag would appear silly: "Watch out,' John yelled! It doesn't properly carry the same impact as "Watch out!' John yelled. Likewise for the question mark; "Are we going down there," Susan asked? That reads as if the narrator is asking if Susan asked a question. It's much smoother to write; "Are we going down there?" Susan asked. Although, frequently, there's no real need for dialogue tags with intense, or interrogative dialogue. The situation and your narrative can allow you to skip attribution entirely:

    Hank shook the jammed door using both hands on the rusted handle. As he jerked the door back and forth John saw the ancient mortar between the bricks above the door start to crumble and crack. The wall directly above Hank's head started to bow. John lunged forward grabbing Hank's jacket. "Watch out!"

    Bad writing, but you get the idea.

    "I'll bet he's down here," Amanda said, starting down the basement stairs, into the darkness. The gloom started to swallow her; first her feet, then her legs and her chest. Susan had a terrible feeling about this.

    "Are we really going down there?"
    “Fools” said I, “You do not know
    Silence like a cancer grows
    Hear my words that I might teach you
    Take my arms that I might reach you”
    But my words like silent raindrops fell
    And echoed in the wells of silence : Simon & Garfunkel


    Those who enjoy stirring the chamber-pot should be required to lick the spoon.

    Our job as writers is to make readers dream, to infiltrate their minds with our words and create a new reality; a reality not theirs, and not ours, but a new, unique combination of both.

    Visit Amazon and the Kindle Store to check out Reflections in a Black Mirror, and Chase

    Hidden Content






  3. #13
    Can we do this:

    "Watch out!" yelled John "run as fast as you can."

    Or

    "Watch out!" yelled John "run run!"

  4. #14
    Quote Originally Posted by Hero View Post
    Can we do this:

    "Watch out!" yelled John "run as fast as you can."

    Or

    "Watch out!" yelled John "run run!"
    No. the quotes after 'yelled John.' Are new sentences. There needs to be a period after John.
    “Fools” said I, “You do not know
    Silence like a cancer grows
    Hear my words that I might teach you
    Take my arms that I might reach you”
    But my words like silent raindrops fell
    And echoed in the wells of silence : Simon & Garfunkel


    Those who enjoy stirring the chamber-pot should be required to lick the spoon.

    Our job as writers is to make readers dream, to infiltrate their minds with our words and create a new reality; a reality not theirs, and not ours, but a new, unique combination of both.

    Visit Amazon and the Kindle Store to check out Reflections in a Black Mirror, and Chase

    Hidden Content






  5. #15
    Quote Originally Posted by Terry D View Post
    No. the quotes after 'yelled John.' Are new sentences. There needs to be a period after John.
    Thanks.

    Just to make it clear to myself, I can do this:


    "Watch out," yelled John "run run!"

  6. #16
    Global Moderator Squalid Glass's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Colorado Springs, Colorado
    Posts
    1,606
    Blog Entries
    1
    No.

    "Watch out!" yelled John. "Run, run!"
    "I don't do anything with my life except romanticize and decay with indecision."

    "America I've given you all and now I'm nothing."

  7. #17
    Reading through this thread I noticed a suggestion that putting the attribution tag first makes it clear to the reader who is speaking, but when in real life do we know who is about to start speaking before they do? In reality we don't identify the speaker until they have uttered several words, so putting the tag partway through the dialogue is actually more natural. In fact initially we don't even realise that the sound we can hear is speech until we detect words. Listening and reading are very similar mental processes, aren't they? In a situation such as unambiguous dialogue between two characters no attribution is even necessary because the reader usually knows who will speak next. I have been told that my dialogue reads very realistically, which if true is probably because I think of it as though I am hearing it rather than following any fixed writers' rules on how to write it correctly.

    Much of the skill in writing is in determining exactly when it becomes necessary to tell the reader something, if at all. The conventions for punctuating dialogue do need to be learned, but once you know them be guided by the natural flow of the dialogue and the context to decide exactly how to write it.
    'Sharing an experience creates a reality.' Create a new reality today.
    'There has to be some give and take.' If I can take my time I'm willing to give it.
    'The most difficult criticism that a writer has to comprehend is silence.' So speak up.

  8. #18
    Quote Originally Posted by Ralph Rotten View Post
    Said is dead.
    If you use SAID more than about once per page in your dialog, then your dialog needs to up its game.

    Really, dialog should be filled out with brush strokes and scene painting, and some action.
    But if everything is he said/she said, then you got some skinny dialog.
    To be honest, I respectfully disagree with you, Ralph.

    Ernest Hemingway rarely, if ever, uses any dialogue tags other than "said" because the attitude of the speaker is always clear through the dialogue itself. He is such a master at dialogue that he doesn't need to give their lines a dramatic boost with fancy tags. Sometimes, he will use body language as a way to help us understand the emotions of his characters, but the spare use of tags in general is perfectly consistent with his literary aesthetic. Read some of the first scenes in "The Sun Also Rises" to see good examples of this.

    Personally, I will admit to using colorful tags from time to time if I feel that they are needed. But I think that sometimes, great dialogue (which I certainly haven't learned to write yet) doesn't really need anything else to help it work and to work well.
    Last edited by Periander; July 5th, 2019 at 09:02 PM.

  9. #19
    Quote Originally Posted by Ralph Rotten View Post
    Said is dead.
    If you use SAID more than about once per page in your dialog, then your dialog needs to up its game.
    Stephen King (and a lot of other very qualified people) disagree with you.

    https://skysairyou.wordpress.com/201...dialogue-tags/
    "If you don't like my peaches, don't shake my tree."

  10. #20
    Ralph, why would say such a thing?

    Well, I just think that we're at a point in writing, now, where the reader should be able to follow what's going on, and who's sayin what without these endless 'said so-and-so'. Other writers have been doing it for years.
    And these other tags, like 'yelled' are, or should be, not necessary. You should be able tell who's talking, and how they feel by what they say, and by the situation. It's like showing versus telling.

    You're saying my dialog sucks?!

    Im saying it's not strong enough if you have to rely on all those tags; I mean, they're like 'extra' adjectives.
    I don't know, maybe it's good enough for kids' books.

    Man, that's just like... your opinion.

Page 2 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
This website uses cookies
We use cookies to store session information to facilitate remembering your login information, to allow you to save website preferences, to personalise content and ads, to provide social media features and to analyse our traffic. We also share information about your use of our site with our social media, advertising and analytics partners.