Sir Garadron and the Dragon

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Thread: Sir Garadron and the Dragon

  1. #1
    Member Thomas Norman's Avatar
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    Sir Garadron and the Dragon

    Rise up good knights and drink a cup with me
    to knights of yore, like you, set off to fight
    on exploits bold and deeds of chivalry
    to serve their masters in their desperate plight.


    Drink then my friends and be of great good cheer
    for you shall reap all glory you deserve.
    And fear you never be’t wood or forest dark.
    Be proud and honour the master whom you serve.


    So list’ young knights unto this tale I tell
    So you shall know the greatest of our heroes.
    Garadron, he of mighty strength and steady eye
    invincible atop his faithful Roe.


    Ferocious dragon with fearsome fiery breath
    had appetite for sheep that knew no sate
    nor sheep alone suffice his ravenous maw
    for innocent children too had met their fate.


    Unsafe it was for man to venture near
    the place where roamed that loathsome beast.
    His ugly eye sought out our maidens fair
    for beauty held no sway against such feast.


    No peace nor safety dwelt within our realm
    whilst that foul creature stalked across our land.
    Destruction followed everywhere he trod.
    But destruction for him was now at hand.


    Through tangled wood our handsome knight did ride
    although t’was said the dragon’s living there.
    But he with boisterous laugh and scornful glance
    did mock those wise old men for their great fear.


    Garadron he so brave and reckless went
    into the dark most caverns of that wood.
    With eyes aflame and nostrils flared, his horse
    moved proud and steady, ‘gainst the foe he trod.


    Then coming to a mighty up-stood rock
    with mouth of cave that showed no sign of light
    nor any way to breach its dark embrace,
    the knight drew sword and braced himself to fight.


    A shuffling and a bellow rent the air
    from deep within came clear that dreaded cry.
    T’was like some beast from hell’s deep fiery pit
    with breath that matched the pig’s uncleans’ed sty.


    Then suddenly out burst the monstrous thing
    with glittering eyes and breath of scorching fire.
    Its claws were like unto the blades of scythes,
    its scaly skin like armor on our squire.


    But malice such as this our knight feared not.
    He stood his ground and raised his sword up high.
    Meantime the palfrey reared and flailed his steels,
    in face of peril, he’d not fear to die.


    The Dragon sneered at seeing such a stance
    and flashed his lengthy spear-like tail in rage.
    Our knight then took advantage of that chance
    to bring his trusty blade there to engage.


    The Dragon reared and bellowed out in pain
    whilst deftly Roe got close in at his side.
    Garadron plunged his sword up to the hilt
    into his evil heart though thick the hide.


    The Dragon with a mighty crash fell flat
    and oozing blood he heaved his last weak sigh.
    Garadron punched the air with joyful glee,
    the palfrey danced and threw his proud head high.


    And so good knights all round the tale is told
    of how Garadron slew the dreaded foe.
    So drink my lads and know the best of them
    Garadron and his fearless palfrey Roe.
    Last edited by Thomas Norman; June 10th, 2019 at 06:40 PM.

  2. #2
    A triumph of iambic pentameter and a rip-roaring tale of noble knights and derring-do, well done!

    I think you need to tweak that first line with an edit because it has come up with the second line attached to it.

    I noticed that the syllable count strayed in S6L2 and that pulled me out of the story for a moment but that was all I could pick up on.

  3. #3
    Quote Originally Posted by Thomas Norman View Post
    Rise up good knights and drink a cup with me
    to knights of yore, like you, set off to fight
    on exploits bold and deeds of chivalry
    to serve their masters in their desperate plight.

    (You bring the reader into the tale, bringing forth images of knights at an inn (as if the story is being told from there.) This reminds me of The Canterbury Tales a little bit here, and in a good way.)

    Drink then my friends and be of great good cheer
    for you shall reap all glory you deserve. (Maybe it would do a little good to add "the" before glory? =D )
    And fear you never be’t wood or forest dark.
    Be proud and honour the master whom you serve.


    So list’ young knights unto this tale I tell
    So you shall know the greatest of our heroes.
    Garadron, he of mighty strength and steady eye
    invincible atop his faithful Roe. (A great image to fit into the reader's eye.)


    Ferocious dragon with fearsome fiery breath (Love the alliteration.)
    had appetite for sheep that knew no sate
    nor sheep alone suffice his ravenous maw
    for innocent children too had met their fate. (Sets the tone.)


    Unsafe it was for man to venture near
    the place where roamed that loathsome beast.
    His ugly eye sought out our maidens fair
    for beauty held no sway against such feast.


    No peace nor safety dwelt within our realm
    whilst that foul creature stalked across our land. (Not certain if you need across, but I'll leave that to you.)
    Destruction followed everywhere he trod.
    But destruction for him was now at hand.


    Through tangled wood our handsome knight did ride
    although t’was said the dragon’s living there.
    But he with boisterous laugh and scornful glance
    did mock those wise old men for their great fear.


    Garadron he so brave and reckless went
    into the dark most caverns of that wood.
    With eyes aflame and nostrils flared, his horse
    moved proud and steady, ‘gainst the foe he trod. (Very nice development.)


    Then coming to a mighty up-stood rock
    with mouth of cave that showed no sign of light
    nor any way to breach its dark embrace,
    the knight drew sword and braced himself to fight. (Battle comes!)


    A shuffling and a bellow rent the air
    from deep within came clear that dreaded cry.
    T’was like some beast from hell’s deep fiery pit
    with breath that matched the pig’s uncleans’ed sty.


    Then suddenly out burst the monstrous thing
    with glittering eyes and breath of scorching fire.
    Its claws were like unto the blades of scythes,
    its scaly skin like armor on our squire. (Excellent, evocative description.)


    But malice such as this our knight feared not.
    He stood his ground and raised his sword up high.
    Meantime the palfrey reared and flailed his steels,
    in face of peril, he’d not fear to die.


    The Dragon sneered at seeing such a stance
    and flashed his lengthy spear-like tail in rage.
    Our knight then took advantage of that chance
    to bring his trusty blade there to engage.


    The Dragon reared and bellowed out in pain
    whilst deftly Roe got close in at his side.
    Garadron plunged his sword up to the hilt
    into his evil heart though thick the hide.


    The Dragon with a mighty crash fell flat
    and oozing blood he heaved his last weak sigh.
    Garadron punched the air with joyful glee,
    the palfrey danced and threw his proud head high.


    And so good knights all round the tale is told
    of how Garadron slew the dreaded foe.
    So drink my lads and know the best of them
    Garadron and his fearless palfrey Roe. (Great conclusion.)
    Really well done, Thomas. This was a great tale of a hero seeking his glory, and defending the sanctity of the kingdom. I always have liked tales like these, and your modern version is extremely appealing to me. I think you've done great work here- keeping the rhyme scheme in-tact while still venturing forth poetically, like your hero, to bring forth the words you seek.

    Excellent work!
    Last edited by Bard_Daniel; June 12th, 2019 at 06:18 PM.
    ďAs far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light of meaning in the darkness of mere being,"

    -Carl Jung

  4. #4
    Member Thomas Norman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jenthepen View Post
    A triumph of iambic pentameter and a rip-roaring tale of noble knights and derring-do, well done!

    I think you need to tweak that first line with an edit because it has come up with the second line attached to it.

    I noticed that the syllable count strayed in S6L2 and that pulled me out of the story for a moment but that was all I could pick up on.
    Thank you very much Jen, I did reply to your lovely comment yesterday but it seems to have got lost! I've edited the first line; think that was another posting problem as it was fine in my file. Well spotted on the slip of syllable count I've added the required. Many thanks again for reading and leaving such a positive comment. T.


    Quote Originally Posted by Bard_Daniel View Post
    Really well done, Thomas. This was a great tale of a hero seeking his glory, and defending the sanctity of the kingdom. I always have liked tales like these, and your modern version is extremely appealing to me. I think you've done great work here- keeping the rhyme scheme in-tact while still venturing forth poetically, like your hero, to bring forth the words you seek.

    Excellent work!
    Bard_Daniel that is one superb comment and I thank you most sincerely. I too love the tales of chivalry and for me poetry is rhythm, alliteration and the other figures of rhetoric, and too a lesser degree rhyme. So I'm pleased you picked up on those points. 'across' in S6 was added to bring the syllable count into line -spotted by Jen- but I agree it is superfluous.

    Thanks again for your very kind approbation. T.

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