not a story?


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Thread: not a story?

  1. #1

    not a story?

    hello forumites!

    i am examining an experimental format narrative
    to find what works, what doesn't and how changing
    what doesn't effects what used to work just fine.
    styled triptych.
    theme food chain.

    link is here.
    will pull in specific exerpts as needed.
    -scripting the nodes-

    visual differentiation is constrained by the WF editor,
    but i think that may be beneficial.

    reference:
    bold phrases are minimum content for context
    left column current science (biochem).....right column psychology/classical philosophy

    center semiotics
    narrative
    blatant application of bookending/anchoring

    tell me why you didn't read it
    and
    where you stopped.

    pls.n.thx,
    m

    three dee cross point, wiki

    NAND, wiki
    NOR, wiki
    Last edited by -xXx-; March 11th, 2019 at 07:37 PM.

  2. #2
    Three dee cross point memory NAND returns. I stopped here because I wasn't sure what the meaning was and you were stating. Tying it all together seems difficult to do. Also for a story its best to narrate. For informational purposes it is good and of course I don't mean to imply its not a story. Just because I am giving a response. I am familiar with cognitive dissonance and like the overall message. I can even recognize some people I have met, seen, talk certain ways because of your psychology "explaining." I liked the philosophy explanations, easy and clear. The biochemistry is a little tricky to get together in one spot. I saw the last paragraph since I had to skim a little. Such as gpcrs. Overall I like the message, positive, and smart. I think you did an admirable job explaining some difficult concepts. Biochemistry might need to be clarified how it ties to social aspects besides medicine. I hope there is enough to contemplate here. Thanks for sharing. The last lines do tie it all together to be fair.

    -glasshouse.
    I would follow as in believe in the words of good moral leaders. Rather than the beliefs of oneself.
    The most difficult thing for a writer to comprehend is to experience silence, so speak up. (quoted from a member)

  3. #3
    I'd bet no one read the read the whole thing start to finish. I skim read random parts, which the jumbled format facilitates. The bits i did read made no sense in isolation, let alone in context. For instance:

    the infinite shame:
    ecliptic eclectic,
    montage menagerie.
    Call to vocation.
    Response
    as profession, public vow.
    Occupation as hourglass.
    There are always unforseen consequences during inversion.

    Means nothing to me: no images form in my mind, no senses are evoked, just leaves some tumbleweed bouncing between my ears.

    The overall presentation vaguely resembles a programming script, which piqued my interest.

  4. #4
    Supervisor velo's Avatar
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    I'm going to be frank; I was utterly baffled by the piece. It was indecipherable to me and I got no meaning from it. My wife and I described it as text-based performance art but one whose message was never revealed. We are both science and computer(me)/medical(her) nerds so we understood or were familiar with many of the things listed but could find no cohesion or correlation.

    I think a piece like this would do better with a specific demographic but not on a general writing forum where more traditional storytelling is the norm. You describe this as an 'experimental format narrative.' It was clearly an experimental format but I could not find a narrative in it. By definition a narrative is a story, a series of connected events told in print or spoken word, and for me that part was entirely missing.

    Bravo for the attempt, but the message/intent was too subtle for me.
    "Don't fuck with writers, we will describe you." -unknown

    My blog- Hidden Content thoughts on trauma and healing through psychedelic-assisted psychotherapy

    "When a child is abused, he or she will often internalise that abuse as deserved. It is a cruel reality that a child needs the parent so much, is evolutionarily programmed to trust them so implicitly, that when a parent is abusive the child will take the blame rather than completely upend their world and blame the person they depend on for survival." -velo

  5. #5
    Feel the need to just say: I read the whole thing. And I quite enjoyed it. I think this sort of experimental lit is absolutely your strength. True I could determine no meaning in it but likewise I need determine no meaning in the 7-minute feedback soliloquy that characterises Sonic Youth’s mid-90s offering, “The Diamond Sea”, to derive a thrill from it. Readers of more traditional narratives will probably not gel with it to be fair, and that’s okay, but I see no reason not to submit this to a lit mag that specialises in such content. I don’t just say this to puff you up either; poor execution has me raging as much as anyone, and I have no issue saying so, but this wasn’t that. I would add: choose your audience. Not everyone likes everything.

    Now you. Tell us what you meant to achieve by it I’m genuinely interested.


    Hidden Content Monthly Fiction Challenge


    Beauty is nothing but the beginning of terror which we are barely able to endure, and are awed,
    because it serenely disdains to annihilate us.
    - Rainer Maria Rilke, "Elegy I"

    *

    Is this fire, or is this mask?
    It's the Mantasy!
    - Anonymous

    *

    C'mon everybody, don't need this crap.
    - Wham!





  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by Theglasshouse View Post
    Three dee cross point memory NAND returns. I stopped here because I wasn't sure what the meaning was and you were stating. Tying it all together seems difficult to do. Also for a story its best to narrate. For informational purposes it is good and of course I don't mean to imply its not a story. Just because I am giving a response. I am familiar with cognitive dissonance and like the overall message. I can even recognize some people I have met, seen, talk certain ways because of your psychology "explaining." I liked the philosophy explanations, easy and clear. The biochemistry is a little tricky to get together in one spot. I saw the last paragraph since I had to skim a little. Such as gpcrs. Overall I like the message, positive, and smart. I think you did an admirable job explaining some difficult concepts. Biochemistry might need to be clarified how it ties to social aspects besides medicine. I hope there is enough to contemplate here. Thanks for sharing. The last lines do tie it all together to be fair.

    -glasshouse.
    hi glasshouse!
    you were very patient!
    you read alot before you stopped.

    i've been thinking about how best to do this
    and i think i will link supplemental information
    in the original request post
    .
    if i told you that
    3D XPoint (pronounced
    three dee cross point
    [1]) is a non-volatile
    memory technology.
    if i told you that NAND and NOR
    are decision making processors.
    would that assist you?

    the bottom line take away from that section
    of the narrative is a shift in the way
    people look at filtering.

    if there are 2 "facts" on the table,
    and 3 of the 4 possible true/false
    combinations (TT, TF, FT, FF)
    of those 2 facts result in a final decision
    of FALSE, would the way you looked at
    the 2 "facts" be different?

    many people are accustomed to thinking
    that information coming to them,
    especially from significant relationship
    people, is inherently true.

    if you read just the bold text on the science
    side, does it have meaning for you?
    i'm pretty sure you know some things
    about biochemical effects of stress,
    and about the intensity (or perceived
    dire consequence(s)) compounding effects/affects.

    thank you very much for reading,
    and responding specifically about
    your experience.
    Last edited by -xXx-; March 11th, 2019 at 07:46 PM.

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by epimetheus View Post
    I'd bet no one read the read the whole thing start to finish. I skim read random parts, which the jumbled format facilitates. The bits i did read made no sense in isolation, let alone in context. For instance:

    the infinite shame:
    ecliptic eclectic,
    montage menagerie.
    Call to vocation.
    Response
    as profession, public vow.
    Occupation as hourglass.
    There are always unforseen consequences during inversion.

    Means nothing to me: no images form in my mind, no senses are evoked, just leaves some tumbleweed bouncing between my ears.

    The overall presentation vaguely resembles a programming script, which piqued my interest.
    you win!
    what does it program?
    with what program?
    and how?

    *and other stuff*

  8. #8
    velo and bd,

    up to letting a little time pass
    before i respond to your feedback?

    i'm interested in e's thoughts.

    many thanks to both of you.
    i really think i can hammer this into
    a keeper.

  9. #9
    I haven't read it but must say, it seems, your ambition is daring.
    Last edited by theoldman; March 11th, 2019 at 09:31 PM.

  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by theoldman View Post
    I haven't read it but must say, it seems, your ambition is daring.
    *looks forward to hearing your feedback*

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