Zodiacal Light - Page 2

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Thread: Zodiacal Light

  1. #11
    We do love our sad stories, Kevin. Thank you for your comments, I have lived with this one for so long that it is hard for me to see what you are saying about the second line being a mouthful. Occupational hazard of being a poet, I think.
    There is no life I know
    To compare with pure imagination.
    Living there you’ll be free
    If you truly wish to be.~ Willy Wonka

  2. #12
    a poem charged with depth....when i read poetry that takes a few uncomplicated words and i read on to the end..sometimes one gets that feeling i'm so glad i just read that...
    The only one who can heal you is you.




  3. #13
    Thank you escorial, that is a lovely compliment!
    There is no life I know
    To compare with pure imagination.
    Living there you’ll be free
    If you truly wish to be.~ Willy Wonka

  4. #14
    Being an old amateur astronomer, I bit on the zodiacal light title, only to be gobsmacked by the poem. Very powerful stuff. The only part that I found a bit jarring is the, "before pulling the plug" line. It absolutely nails the connection between the bath and the suicide, but I found the colloquialism to be a speed-bump along an otherwise smooth road. Its tone seems almost facetious to me, but I sure don't have any good suggestions for modifying it.

    Thanks for sharing.
    “Fools” said I, “You do not know
    Silence like a cancer grows
    Hear my words that I might teach you
    Take my arms that I might reach you”
    But my words like silent raindrops fell
    And echoed in the wells of silence : Simon & Garfunkel


    Those who enjoy stirring the chamber-pot should be required to lick the spoon.

    Our job as writers is to make readers dream, to infiltrate their minds with our words and create a new reality; a reality not theirs, and not ours, but a new, unique combination of both.

    Visit Amazon and the Kindle Store to check out Reflections in a Black Mirror, and Chase

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  5. #15
    Thank you, Terry!
    There is no life I know
    To compare with pure imagination.
    Living there you’ll be free
    If you truly wish to be.~ Willy Wonka

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