Ways to Defeat a Witch? (preferably funny ways) - Page 2

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Thread: Ways to Defeat a Witch? (preferably funny ways)

  1. #11
    Thanks for all the creative suggestions, everyone. They helped me out a lot.

  2. #12
    Have him throw water on a witch, and she makes squealing noises like she's melting, then says "Psyche! Water doesn't kill witches!"
    And he says "But trucks do" as a pickup runs her over.

  3. #13
    Trick them into saying their own name, which, magically, turns them into a toad, rendering them harmless. A real pacifist way to defeat witches!

  4. #14
    Member Guard Dog's Avatar
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    I recall reading somewhere that cutting a witch's left foot off renders her powerless too... but only ones that gain their power through a certain rite... one where they place their left hand on top of their head, their left foot in their right hand,while standing on their right foot, and proclaiming that all between their two hands belongs to Satan.

    So maybe a yard littered in old fashioned bear traps would be useful? Could certainly cause some interesting or entertaining moments if someone isn't aware that it has to be a specific foot, and not just one of 'em.

    Yes, I know a thing or two about witches... Can't be married to the women I have been, for as long as I was, and not learn somethin' about 'em...



    G.D.
    Last edited by Guard Dog; November 12th, 2018 at 11:13 PM. Reason: Sorting out hands, so the witch doesn't have to be too much of a contortionist.
    Leave it be and it won't bother you.
    Screw with it, and it'll eat you alive.

    Soon enough, nations will play second fiddle to corporations.

    "The world is not what we wish it to be; it is what it is."
    "Freedom is the value, not protection."

  5. #15
    FoWF Hill.T.Manner's Avatar
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    So nobody is gonna mention dropping a piece of architecture on her?

  6. #16
    Member Guard Dog's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hill.T.Manner View Post
    So nobody is gonna mention dropping a piece of architecture on her?
    Doesn't that require a pet tornado?

    Edit:
    On second thought, I just came up with something that sounds like it belongs in a "Far side" cartoon:
    A fellow up in a tree, wearing military fatigues, a woman sprawled underneath, knocked out and a crunched doll house on her head, and the fellow talking into a radio;
    "Operation Dorothy is a success. Repeat, Operation Dorothy is a success."




    G.D.
    Last edited by Guard Dog; November 13th, 2018 at 05:32 AM.
    Leave it be and it won't bother you.
    Screw with it, and it'll eat you alive.

    Soon enough, nations will play second fiddle to corporations.

    "The world is not what we wish it to be; it is what it is."
    "Freedom is the value, not protection."

  7. #17

  8. #18
    "And what do we burn, apart from witches?"

  9. #19
    Member NathanielleC's Avatar
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    Give their shop a bad Yelp review.

  10. #20
    Member Myk3y's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Goob View Post
    I'm interested in different ways to defeat a coven of witches. It's for a comedy so the crazier, the better. Right now, I have them killed off by fire, but it feels too serious. I considered water (like in Oz), but I don't think that would be believable since they're from earth and we have so much water here. Something from witch mythology would work best.
    Witches get stitches, yo!

    A poorly-wired charge cable for their wand could wreak havoc. Sneezing powder in their hats, tainted newt, or sugar in their tea will do the job.

    As we all know, witches love to partake of snuff - but not the tobacco variety. And we know they are averse to sugar and spice and all things nice - I would dose their snuff with babies tears of laughter or little girls squeals of joy.

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