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  1. #1

    Jump

    So I was sitting on my couch after work tonight, I don't know why but the concept for this song hit me out of nowhere. It's more of my usual desperately sad stuff about looking over the edge of a cliff at my favorite go-to spot where I like to go when I'm sad or lonely. I have a tune in my head but I haven't even begun to try to pick out an instrumental for it. Hopefully soon, though! I may even add another four lines or merely replace four of the existing lines. In deciphering the lyrics, you'll see in the chorus the word "jump" is repeated in parenthesis; this represents the word "Jump" being said once and then repeated in a fading-echo fashion through a delay filter. The word "spirit'ial" represents the word "spiritual" being abbreviated/slurred to three syllables instead of four. I only spent about two hours on this, so I'm sure it could use some polishing up.

    As always - be honest, be brutal, any little nit-picky thing let me know about it!

    “Jump”
    Approx 63BPM

    [Verse 1]
    It’s a long, long way, to the end of the trail
    He’s done it all before, he’ll know when he is there
    A maple covered mountain top, a view that goes for miles
    Is where he’ll go when he needs to know if he can even smile
    Anymore

    And there’s a million leaves on a thousand trees
    He takes in every one, the changing red and green
    And far below a river flows, his fav’rite place to be
    It’s where he’ll go when he needs to know if he can even smile
    Anymore

    [Pre-Chorus 1]
    He stops and bows his head to think
    It’s been another year
    The wind is warm and welcoming
    It whispers in his ear

    [Chorus]
    Jump (jump…jump…)
    It’s the calling of the void
    Jump (jump…jump…)
    What he came here to avoid
    He could take a step; he could almost fly
    He could walk away; and refuse to die
    or Jump (jump…jump…)
    Jump (jump…jump…)

    [Verse 2]
    It’s a long life span, to become a frail old man
    Far too long to make it, when no one holds your hand
    A melancholy permanence, a mournful many years
    Is what he owns, why he never knows, if he can ever smile
    Anymore

    [Pre-Chorus 2]
    The echo of his cries return
    from out across the way
    To let go of his painful yearn
    And spirit’ial decay

    [CHORUS]
    Jump (jump…jump…)
    It’s the calling of the void
    Jump (jump…jump…)
    What he came here to avoid
    He could take a step; he could almost fly
    He could walk away; and refuse to die
    or Jump (jump…jump…)
    Jump (jump…jump…)

    [Bridge]
    And isn’t it ironic, he came here all this way
    To fix his biggest failure, but chose to walk away

    [Verse 3]
    And it’s a long, long way, from the edge of the world
    To a cold and empty dwelling, for a sadness so unfurled
    Uncertainty possesses him, why didn’t he atone
    His curs-ed bones car-ry him home, but he’ll prob’ly never smile
    Anymore

    [Generic Instrumental bit for 45 seconds or so]


    [*song volume fading out*]

    Jump…(jump…jump...)
    Jump…(jump…jump...)
    Jump…(jump…jump...)
    Jump…(jump…jump...)

  2. #2
    I like the words. Without hearing what you are hearing, it's hard to imagine the direction of the melody. There are couple spots that will "clean up" once you sing it I am sure.

    Nicely done. A bit dark but I like it.

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