Rough (And I mean ROUGH) recording here at the link below. I was singing the song in my head while recording the guitar part which is rather untraditional and I left out one beat in one of the chorus measures and completely threw off the second chorus, but it sounds just like the first and third choruses. I also can't sing, but this thread is and should be about the lyrics and any necessary improvements. A few of the words in the lyrics may be different in the recording.

https://soundcloud.com/robert-oleary...istine/s-U2d2K

This is another song I wrote before taking that semi-formal online songwriting video lecture course, so it is somewhat more lacking and I honestly can't even tell what the time signature is because I knew nothing about songwriting when I wrote this - it's just completely emotionally driven. Anyways, here it is, critique away! And as always, be as critical as you can. Nothing gained from an insincere pat on the back for something that isn't done right.

"Happy for You (Christine)"
Timbre: Acoustic Guitar, 6 String, Standard Tuning Capo 1, strummed chords
Chord Progression is something I don't know enough music theory to explain...

[Verse 1]


I woke up like I always did
In this lonely single bed
Open my eyes to clear my head when you come crashing in
And so begins again another day alone

I check myself before I leave
My phone, my wallet, got my keys
But I won't have you next to me
No matter where I go
Oh damn I should have known I wouldn't need my phone

[Chorus 1]

But I've said all that I can say
And there's no way around this change
You left me yesterday
Please know I'm not mad at you
For something that you had to do
That even through the pain
I'm happy for you, babe

[Verse 2]

Now I've gone back to my old ways
All I have's this pack-a-day
But even that can't back away
These homesick thoughts of you
And there's nothing left to do but just try to get through

But time goes on as it tends to do
'Til I can't help but send to you
A quick 'hey there' or 'how-r-u'
But again you fade away
And silence mourns the day where you used to stay

[Chorus 2]

But I've said all that I can say
And there's no way around this change
You left me yesterday
And I don't have to like the truth
But the happiness I stand to lose
Is only yours to gain
So be happy for me, babe.

[Verse 3]

The sun's long dead 'fore I get home
But there's no point to try to go
To sleep tonight, my mind will roam
Back to just me and you
And lying next to you on a night with no moon

So midnight turns to three then four
As I traverse this kitchen floor
I think about you more and more
And sometimes I swear my soles
Are starting to wear holes where I walk alone

[Chorus 3]

Now I've said all that I can say
And there's no way around this change
You left me yesterday
If you speak truth and I am missed
Then baby give me one last wish
I wanna live to hear you say
"I was happy for you, babe"

[Bridge / Outro]

As we go on down through the years
Please remember I am here
I hope that I have shown you dear
Just what you mean to me
And thanks for everything, Christine

//End song//


That took a while longer to write out than expected, I had to play through it to jog my memory on the words a bit! My only point of concern is the word "traverse" in verse 3; I'd like to find another 2-syllable word for walking/crossing/pacing as "traverse" is not a very common word and I want my listeners to realize a mental image, not realize that they don't have a dictionary handy... lol

Lots of throwaway syllables and grammatically incorrect contractions, but it's how people around here speak anyways.