Andie's Mountain - Page 4

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  1. #31
    Member Underd0g's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack of all trades View Post
    Bolding are my suggestions :


    Maybe add a piece here where his mother explains the running water is a spring, the still water is a pond, and the tall things are trees before going off in search of food.


    These are only suggestions, but at least it points out all the little modifications that you would need to make.

    Good luck with it! I hope to see your version soon!

    Jack
    Well Jack, I think you nailed it. Instead of focusing on new experiences because of a move, new experiences because of new independence. Kids can relate to a visit to Grandma's house or an overnight play date. Venturing out from the familiar and learning from unexpected ways.

    Thanks for that!
    If you look at my profile, say "Hi!" But not in a creepy way.

  2. #32
    Quote Originally Posted by Underd0g View Post
    Well Jack, I think you nailed it. Instead of focusing on new experiences because of a move, new experiences because of new independence. Kids can relate to a visit to Grandma's house or an overnight play date. Venturing out from the familiar and learning from unexpected ways.

    Thanks for that!
    Or the first day of school.

    Glad you like my suggestions, and don't see any resemblance to Frankenstein!

  3. #33
    Member Underd0g's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack of all trades View Post

    ...and don't see any resemblance to Frankenstein!
    "Nothing is so painful to the human mind as a great and sudden change."--- Mary Shelley
    If you look at my profile, say "Hi!" But not in a creepy way.

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