Furcifer - Looking for beta readers [Action/Horror/SuperHero]

[Le Vieux Loup]

Hello, as the title would suggest, I've recently restarted to work on a somewhat old project of mine.

It is still a big work in progress. It blends elements of action, supernatural/demonic horror, superhero, portal fantasy, and a bit mystery comedy, and maybe a little bit of romance.

• I'm looking for help with the logic of the portals and alternate planes of existence, as I have trouble in figuring out how to make them work in a more coherent and sensical manner then they do now - according to me at least.
• I would also like if someone could tell me if the dialogue feel natural, in the sense that they sound like something an actual human being would say. All while fitting with the character's personality of course.
• And if you can, can you tell me if the overall story is any good thus far or is it a dumpster fire, if you know what I mean.
• While you're at it, I'm curious to know if you have any theories so far, as I'm a sucker for fan theories.

Thus far it has around 7107 words and maybe less, as I've recently done some spelling and grammar check and still intend on either removing or postponing a particular scene to a future instalment. If you want, you could also give me your thoughts on that particular moment. Or maybe on some ideas for some upcoming scenes that I intent to implement later on.

If you're interested please tell me, that would motivate me a lot to know that at least a few people care about my work.

[JustRob]

Hi again VL. I am the mentor for the beta reading forums here, so I ought to explain them a little. For a start, this forum is open to all members, even new members who haven't qualified to post their work elsewhere yet, but it isn't good etiquette to use this feature as a way of getting other members to review your work before you have shown that you are willing to contribute to the general forums. That doesn't mean that you won't get any replies here, but the way to gain a reputation and give people an idea of your skill before they commit to beta reading is to post extracts from your work in the general forums for critique there. The beta reading forums are for offering completed works for a full read through rather than requests for ideas during development of a work. I am aware that you are concerned about security but when you have completed your ten posts and become a full member you will discover that there are workshop areas not accessible by anyone but full members where work can be posted without fear of it going astray or being deemed to have been published. I think your current request would be better submitted through one of these when you get access to them.

Please don't regard this as a reprimand. We mentors are here just to give advice on how the site is meant to work so that new members can settle in more easily. We are very tolerant but it is all too easy for new members just to see the site as a cost-free service to assist them without their giving anything back in return. I have used professional services that do this sort of assessment work, so am aware of exactly how valuable the service that can be provided here is. The ethos here is about giving as good as you get, so please bear that in mind. We all want to improve our writing abilities and that can best be achieved by commenting on each other's work equally.

P.S.
I almost forgot to mention this but there are people here who care. It almost goes without saying. As my signature says, the most difficult criticism to comprehend is silence. If nobody comments then one doesn't know whether one's work is too good, too bad or nobody cares enough even to read it. We understand that and do something about it.

[Jay Greenstein]

Something to keep in mind: You're not looking for beta readers. A beta reader is someone who looks at a completer and edited work to get a reader's reaction to it. And your story, as you describe it, is nowhere near that. And from the questions you ask, it appears that you're really looking for is something like: "After reading this, on a scale of one to ten, where seven is the line between publishable and un-publishable, where am I? And how can I get closer to ten."

And if that's true, this site is the place to learn that, just not in this section. Post a few hundred words of the opening in the Prose Writers Workshop. Most structural and craft problems will show up in the first three pages, so it's best to get them out of the way first.

[Le Vieux Loup]

Thank you guys for the notice, next time I'll make sure I post in the right sections when they will be available to me. Also I'm not 100% familiar with certain concepts like beta reading and other things related to "community writing" or whatever the proper term is, so thanks for clearing this out.

By the way Rob, I've got a question or two. First, once I'll actually be done with the text, can I come back here and edit the post to tell that, or will I have to make a new thread? Second, if I'm writing a series, can I come here to ask for beta readers after I'm done with every instalment, or can I only ask reader for the first? And if can't make more then one post for a single series, does that mean I have to come back and edit the post every time a new opus is ready? Also, does the whole series has to be written to considered "acceptable" to be posted here? Sorry if some of those questions sound dumb.

[JustRob]

Beta reading is distinctly different from other activities on this site particularly because it doesn't actually happen on site at all. The beta reading forums, of which there have been several here for historical reasons, are predominantly for readers and writers to make contact. Once that has happened they privately agree what they are going to do and the site staff have no control over the process. Of course that does make my job as the beta reading mentor somewhat meaningless, but I'm used to doing the impossible and of course making things up as I go along if nobody tells me otherwise.

The reason for it happening off site is that that avoids complete works, for example entire novels, being stored on the site. The workshop areas are protected from access by non-members, but even so a writer may want to limit the number of people who have access to their unpublished work to very few directly under their own control. Hence your questions about a series of works, by which you may mean a collection of related short stories or chapters in a novel, would best be posed to anyone who offers to read your work, given that there is no need for any of the text to appear on the site and passing a long work to them by say email is probably best done in sections for added security anyway.

My own angel wife BlondeAverageReader is, as her user name implies, just an avid reader with no writing experience but good critical skills, who has arranged with quite a few members to read their works and how that has been arranged in each case has been different. I should mention immediately that she has preferences as to the genres that she reads, so wouldn't be interested in reading your own current work. How competent any writer is is unimportant though as improvement is the whole purpose of the site. Usually her correspondence quickly moves from private messages on site to offsite emails where portions of works can be passed to her without passing through the site. Clearly then this activity is quite different from that in the forums here, where portions of a work are posted openly for immediate comment by any member caring to. As Jay has pointed out, just posting an opening fragment will get sufficient comments as to whether readers are likely to keep on reading, our key aim as writers, and if not why not. Even when posting a beta reading request here it is advisable to include a sample of the text so that potential readers can make an informed decision whether to contact you, but the best approach is first to gain a reputation among members by posting examples of your work for comment in the main workshops.

Regarding altering this thread, members will, if they are sensible, always read the latest posts in a thread to determine the up to date situation, so simply add new posts to it as and when things change. It is possible to go back and change the text of old posts, but this can make a nonsense of other people's posts in the thread if they have commented on something that you have removed. I once encountered a joker who posted a small item for comment and then kept replacing it with others after people had commented, so the comments had nothing to do with what currently appeared in the thread as the apparent original post. It is acceptable to replace text with a later version if one has just been editing it to make improvements as that saves having several complete copies in the thread, but this has little to do with this thread except that you could edit your original post to add a short extract from your item as a sample as suggested. There's no need to create any new threads so long as the title covers what you post here. Assuming that "Furcifer" is the title of your work it wouldn't make much sense to mention a subsequent work with a different title here when you could just as easily post a new thread for that which explained that it is related to this work. It is really up to you though as people tend to read new posts regardless of which specific threads they appear in, especially if they have chosen to follow your posts in particular, via your profile.

That was the long answer; the short one is to do whatever works and doesn't annoy anyone. As I said, we're very tolerant ... except of bad writing of course; bad writers, yes, but bad writing, no. It's nothing personal.