The frustrated limerick. - Page 7


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Thread: The frustrated limerick.

  1. #61
    WF Veteran Bloggsworth's Avatar
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    She finds all the rhymes that she needs
    when chewing the Kanna's small seeds
    but when her mind blew
    she continued to chew
    and caught the pink airship to Leeds.
    A man in possession of a wooden spoon must be in want of a pot to stir.

  2. #62
    The pink airship that l caught to Leeds
    Was lacking the facilities one needs
    With no place to ‘go’
    And the journey so slow
    When we landed l watered the weeds
    Last edited by BlondeAverageReader; July 6th, 2019 at 11:45 PM.

  3. #63
    Member Underd0g's Avatar
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    On another site they challenged me to write a limerick about payments:

    You think no one cares about you
    I know this is so far from true
    Miss on your car loan
    Soon it will be known
    They'll call before you can say, "boo"


    My college loan was a mistake
    My classes I have to retake
    But things will be awesome
    I won't have a problem
    Ol' Bernie will give me a break



    Cash problems, I really have felt it
    Name setbacks, and I have been dealt it
    I've missed payments it's true
    On my comfy igloo
    The bank came, so that they could melt it
    If you look at my profile, say "Hi!" But not in a creepy way.

  4. #64
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    A finicky lady from Cheam
    would eat only peaches and cream
    this tasty confection
    did help her complexion
    but made her quite broad in the beam


  5. #65
    A fussy old man from Sutton
    Ate Sunday roast of mutton
    His belly did bloat
    Like Mr Creosote
    It was then that he popped his buttons


  6. #66
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    A popular singer called Midge
    now lives in derelict fridge
    If you pay him a tenner
    he’ll sing you Vienna
    and jump off the Waterloo Bridge.
    Last edited by Dylan di Vilde; February 21st, 2020 at 03:43 PM.

  7. #67
    WF Veteran Bloggsworth's Avatar
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    When trying to write words sublime
    sometimes one seeks help divine
    but when no help comes
    I find one succumbs
    to the charms of the fruit of the vine.
    A man in possession of a wooden spoon must be in want of a pot to stir.

  8. #68
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    He frenziedly reached for my hand
    as he sank in the treacherous sand
    appealing to me
    with a desperate plea
    forgetting I owed him ten grand.


  9. #69


    A poet who wrote on this forum
    had no notion at all of decorum.
    When he pressed ‘like’ and ‘lol’
    he would empty his soul
    in a long monologue that would bore ‘em.

  10. #70
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    Limericks Banned!


    Listen, I haven’t much time
    though I swear I’ve committed no crime
    the powers that be
    want to persecute me -
    the outlaw bandido of rhyme.

    The limerick now is unlawful -
    branded as hackneyed and awful!
    but as you can see
    they didn’t stop me -
    believe me I got a whole drawer full

    They’ve put a large price on my head -
    a Serial Rhymer they said
    But Desperate Dylan -
    intractable villain
    is constantly one step ahead.

    Keeping my cool under fire
    and dressed in civilian attire
    I bravely got through
    to bring this to you
    like Steve McQueen over the wire.

    But now I must swiftly away
    like the bloke who delivers Milk Tray
    for hark the chill sounds
    of the following hounds,
    my going I cannot delay.

    But if on some lonely black night,
    you notice some fleet shadow sprite,
    it just might be me
    and my bad poetree
    still fighting the limerick fight.

    So if there’s a knock on the door
    and there’s two shady types from the law,
    remember the deal -
    poets don’t squeal
    and You’ve never seen me before.

    But if they are coming for you
    think about what you must do
    you may find that you are a
    poetic Guevara
    then you’ll be a renegade too.
    Rescued from Oblivion ľall my poems now in one fat book. Available now at Hidden Content


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