Ungrammatical/makes sense. Now what? - Page 4


Page 4 of 4 FirstFirst 1234
Results 31 to 38 of 38

Thread: Ungrammatical/makes sense. Now what?

  1. #31
    Quote Originally Posted by ppsage View Post
    The unnecessarily repeated simple subject is a style note ....
    Yeah, studying Bill's sentence got me to left dislocations, like Jimmy, he's my friend. That's a repetition of the subject.

    It's a big stretch to call Bill's sentence a left dislocation. I know that. But it's also interesting. What if the first subject is I with all the crap memories of my life? Then the second repetition is simply the word I. That, oddly enough, would justify the lack of comma before with.

    He has another sentence that is a left dislocation: Outdoors was the place to be, and television, we were lucky to own one. That's not easy for me to rewrite and keep outdoors and television as the subjects (parallel form).
    How to write a good start: Hidden Content . Useful, original information. Long and thorough.
    Includes Hidden Content (do you start with description?), Hidden Content (a favorite with publishers apparently), starting with Hidden Content (a lost art), and more.

  2. #32
    WF Veteran W.Goepner's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Location
    Auburn, California
    Posts
    1,362
    Blog Entries
    1
    Quote Originally Posted by EmmaSohan View Post
    Yeah, studying Bill's sentence got me to left dislocations, like Jimmy, he's my friend. That's a repetition of the subject.

    It's a big stretch to call Bill's sentence a left dislocation. I know that. But it's also interesting. What if the first subject is I with all the crap memories of my life? Then the second repetition is simply the word I. That, oddly enough, would justify the lack of comma before with.

    He has another sentence that is a left dislocation: Outdoors was the place to be, and television, we were lucky to own one. That's not easy for me to rewrite and keep outdoors and television as the subjects (parallel form).

    I can certainly go along with I need help, and Emma thanks for pointing these things out. I do not know if I can keep the simple feelings I was attempting and fix the grammar.

    To give a feel of what I was trying to say, I would go back to when dad slipped had broke his back. He was placed in a body cast which made his life miserable and ours down right horrid. My brother and I were not allowed to go out to play, because he was miserable. Yet to be in the house and play we were too noisy. If we sat in front of the TV we were scolded for sitting around. Dad would complain about the dirty house and then complain about the vacuum when mom went to clean.

    I could not tell you how long this lasted, but mom became fed up and she moved him to our cabin in the middle of the forest. A hour and a half away from the house. She told him, "When you can learn to live with yourself then you can come back to live with us." A week after she moved him there she brought him a puppy. "Now You have more than yourself to worry about. Train her, spoil her, do as you wish, she is your responsibility." Every week we would go see him. He would want to come home. Mom would not comment other than, "We shall see." Basically, if he made it a day with my brother and I running about the cabin and doing little boy stuff and he managed to not scream and yell at us, mom would consider his coming home.

    How does this fit with the out of doors verses watching TV? Um, not much. It is an attempt to show the life I had as a child, a way to say when I was young even though we had a TV we did not sit in front of it all day.
    My friends and family call me Bill, you may also.Hidden Content

    When people meet people,
    Potential Strangers, Acquaintances, Friends.

    When dogs meet people,
    Potential Friends, Acquaintances, Strangers.

    I would rather be the Dog.

    It takes only,
    A second to meet,
    A moment to know,
    A Lifetime to forget.


    A word without thought can destroy.
    Please remember to think before you speak.

  3. #33
    Quote Originally Posted by EmmaSohan View Post
    Yeah, studying Bill's sentence got me to left dislocations, like Jimmy, he's my friend. That's a repetition of the subject.

    It's a big stretch to call Bill's sentence a left dislocation. I know that. But it's also interesting. What if the first subject is I with all the crap memories of my life? Then the second repetition is simply the word I. That, oddly enough, would justify the lack of comma before with.

    He has another sentence that is a left dislocation: Outdoors was the place to be, and television, we were lucky to own one. That's not easy for me to rewrite and keep outdoors and television as the subjects (parallel form).
    A good reference for pragmatics and for a definition for left dislocation in particular can be found here: Unexpected Left Dislocation
    "You don't wanna ride the bus like this,"

    Mike Posner.

    Hidden Content

  4. #34
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquilo View Post
    A good reference for pragmatics and for a definition for left dislocation in particular can be found here: Unexpected Left Dislocation
    Left dislocations, yeah, they're interesting. Me, I'm overwhelmed by how much there is to learn. The author, she treats them like these exceedingly clever verbal constructions, but she doesn't use any. Don't children use them?

    Thanks for the reference.
    How to write a good start: Hidden Content . Useful, original information. Long and thorough.
    Includes Hidden Content (do you start with description?), Hidden Content (a favorite with publishers apparently), starting with Hidden Content (a lost art), and more.

  5. #35
    For though the inmates hear my strangled screams and think of me as mad, I tell them I am just dislocating the left side for the sake of my craft.


  6. #36
    Outdoors was the place to be, and television, we were lucky to own one.
    Outdoors and not television (we were lucky to even own one) was the place to be.
    A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking. Steven Wright

  7. #37
    Quote Originally Posted by EmmaSohan View Post
    Left dislocations, yeah, they're interesting. Me, I'm overwhelmed by how much there is to learn. The author, she treats them like these exceedingly clever verbal constructions, but she doesn't use any. Don't children use them?

    Thanks for the reference.
    Wow... I'd be surprised if she didn't use them!
    "You don't wanna ride the bus like this,"

    Mike Posner.

    Hidden Content

  8. #38
    Quote Originally Posted by Aquilo View Post
    Wow... I'd be surprised if she didn't use them!
    Yes, it lacked humor. Of course, she might have used one and I didn't notice. But I would be surprised to find a left dislocation in any scientific article. As she notes, it's "typically understood as aconversational syntactic construction"
    How to write a good start: Hidden Content . Useful, original information. Long and thorough.
    Includes Hidden Content (do you start with description?), Hidden Content (a favorite with publishers apparently), starting with Hidden Content (a lost art), and more.

Page 4 of 4 FirstFirst 1234

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
This website uses cookies
We use cookies to store session information to facilitate remembering your login information, to allow you to save website preferences, to personalise content and ads, to provide social media features and to analyse our traffic. We also share information about your use of our site with our social media, advertising and analytics partners.