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Thread: how to attract women

  1. #41
    I thought of some humerous answers but will go with a helpful one
    join a club or gathering that is about something you feel passionate about
    You already have something in common with any single woman in this place

    PS. It easier to met nice people in a library or a grocery market. All you need to do is look helpless and ask advice Your thank you is the offer of a cup of coffee if there are no rings on fingers
    We are the measure of all things. And the beauty of our creation, of our art is proportional to the beauty of ourselves of our souls. Jonas Mekas

  2. #42
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    have a few basic rules.

    Be yourself and do not pretend to be something or someone you are not.
    Love yourself. Self-love and confidence are irresistible for most females.
    Learn how to read body language. Body language betrays words often

  3. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ultraroel View Post
    have a few basic rules.

    Be yourself and do not pretend to be something or someone you are not.
    Love yourself. Self-love and confidence are irresistible for most females.
    Learn how to read body language. Body language betrays words often

    That's where i lost out, have always hated myself. And confidence? Forget it.
    If i post a comment on a "WIP", LOOK! I'm a reader that's all, and i can only tell how i feel, as a READER, giving/offering feedback. Hoping to learn and grow here. So please, tell me where i'm going wrong.

    Me? I'm just a fly on the wall.

    Look! I'm trying, okay?

    One can but dream, if only i had dared.

    "The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong" Mahatma Gandhi.
    Alas, i am weak.

    I must find a way to Eastbourne and i so wish that i could dance.

  4. #44
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    Hmm well, it's one of the most attractive parts. Don't you feel more easily attracted to those who feel great and confident in who they are and what they want?

    Self-love and confidence can be learned and developed. For me it started with simple things that would confirm I could do things.
    Simple confirmation that if I put my mind to it, it would work out and would allow me to feel a sense of achievement.

    If you have discipline, working out can be great for this. It will show you that you will get stronger, feel better physically and gives you a sense of achievement.
    Tell yourself you have a character and skills that have a place in this world and tell yourself you love yourself.. It will be weird .. but will feel less and less awkward.. Scatter notes with positive feedback through the house.. simple things can be very effective. Ask your friends and family what they perceive as your strengths etc..

    I grew up with parents who told me I wasn't worth anyting and would never achieve anything. I come from the position that I did not feel like I had a right to be here and it's hard to break. Definitely worth the effort to get rid of self-loathing and self-sabotage. Unconsciously, you will sabotage what you are trying to achieve cause you don't feel you have a right of success.

  5. #45
    It isn't necessary to love yourself; it's just necessary to love others. Overcoming timidity is a simple case of putting one step in front of the other and not making it all about yourself. Just talk to the girl, and if you enjoy her company, tell her.

    It's difficult for writers who only escape from their holes every now and then to form relationships (do not neglect friendships), so you have to make sure you make time for other people or it will become harder and harder to connect with anybody, be they male or female. We're social creatures and loneliness just results in depression and self-loathing. Courage isn't related to how good you think you are at something, but taking on the full force of your insecurities each time you're with other people. I think it's this character women are attracted to more than anything else. Certainly, that has been my experience. Think of it like this, the jackass who approaches the girl has a better shot (however slim) than the person who isn't bold enough.


  6. #46
    You have to give yourself a break. I mean... you are how you are. Unless you're a serial killer, molester, rapist or something you can't be that bad. And you're born with certain things; lots of things, so that's not your fault.

    "What do you expect of me?"
    "How about company?"
    "What are your views on respect, kindness?"
    "I'm generally for them."
    "Okay then... Yes, we can have coffee."
    "Excellent. I shall bathe and otherwise attend to my hygiene, prior."
    "Good idea. You might try to wear something nice, also."
    "Right. Will do."
    "See you then."
    "Yes, you will."
    Last edited by Kevin; January 11th, 2016 at 04:47 PM.

  7. #47
    Quote Originally Posted by Gofa View Post

    PS. It easier to met nice people in a library or a grocery market. All you need to do is look helpless and ask advice Your thank you is the offer of a cup of coffee if there are no rings on fingers
    You evil genius
    Gestalt Prayer
    I do my thing
    and you do your thing.
    I am not in this world
    to live up to your expectation
    And you are not in this world
    to live up to mine

    You are you and I am I
    And If by chance
    we find each other, its beautiful,
    If not, it can't be helped.

    - Fritz Perls

  8. #48
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    Hmmm self-love is always important if you ask me. In my opinion you can't truly love unless you love yourself. You can love, but it will always be unbalanced and marred by insecurity, which can be a big issue in a relationship. Also, if you love yourself, you are more likely to take that step to love others, or to even accept that others can love you. Yes, it's not necessary by default.. depends on what you intend.. but self-love will give you more chance at being successful at everything you do, as the expectation of your anticipated actions already influence effort and reliability. But maybe I give it too much value as it was my biggest issue so far.

  9. #49
    when i was with my 1st wife, i really needed a thread called "how to UNATTRACT women". i celebrated when she finally left.
    "Man, you should have seen them kicking Edgar Allan Poe.

  10. #50
    Quote Originally Posted by Ultraroel View Post
    Hmmm self-love is always important if you ask me. In my opinion you can't truly love unless you love yourself. You can love, but it will always be unbalanced and marred by insecurity, which can be a big issue in a relationship. Also, if you love yourself, you are more likely to take that step to love others, or to even accept that others can love you. Yes, it's not necessary by default.. depends on what you intend.. but self-love will give you more chance at being successful at everything you do, as the expectation of your anticipated actions already influence effort and reliability. But maybe I give it too much value as it was my biggest issue so far.
    As C.S. Lewis put it, "True humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less."


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