Kind of scared


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Thread: Kind of scared

  1. February 28th, 2015, 04:15 AM #1
    Pidgeon84
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    Kind of scared

    So I think I've finally found a way to start my hormone therapy and begin my transition to becoming female. I'm really torn because it's been such a long time coming. Such a long fucking time. But I'm so scared. Scared of the reactions of every one around me. I'm not one to usually care but there are so many acts of violence against trans people that it's different this time. It's also hard because I feel like I've never had anyone to teach me how to be a girl (though I'll be the last person to tell you there's only one way to do it). But I have no idea how to do so many things. Some that actually require know how and some that are completely subjective. But I've really come to the point where I can't let the cons hold me back anymore. So tomorrow I'm calling and setting up my first assessment for hormone replacement therapy. I'm sure this won't be my last update on this.
    Last edited by Pidgeon84; February 28th, 2015 at 04:32 AM. Reason: I really need to learn to proofread my posts.
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  2. February 28th, 2015, 04:29 AM #2
    Riptide
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    You go girl!

    Don't worry, the best of us females are still learning the trade too, you'll fit right in.
    Anyway, the best of luck!
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  3. February 28th, 2015, 04:30 AM #3
    Pidgeon84
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    Quote Originally Posted by Riptide View Post
    You go girl!

    Don't worry, the best of us females are still learning the trade too, you'll fit right in.
    Anyway, the best of luck!
    Haha glad I'm not the only one. And thank you!
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  4. February 28th, 2015, 04:37 AM #4
    InnerFlame00
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    It's normal to be scared because it's a big change, even if it's one you've wanted for a long time. I will pray for your safety - I know there are hateful people out there who will attack someone just because they are different and it makes me so mad. I'm not sure how things are in Denver as far as the general attitude towards trans people, but you'd be surprised how much people just don't care enough to look twice at a person's face they pass, nevermind pass judgement. I tell myself that any time I feel self conscious. So it may not be as bad as you thought. I imagine that once you are far enough into the therapy the average person will not be able to tell anyhow .

    As for how to be a woman - boy is that complicated! Sometimes I don't understand women and I am one; being born a woman doesn't give me an advantage there. I don't think there's a woman out there who really feels like they've got it all down - and that IS a part of being a woman . I can tell you to be prepared for the emotional roller coaster though - the female hormones are potent stuff. They make me do some crazy things sometimes lol. Hint: chocolate is a great cure all. If you ever have any questions feel free to PM me and I'll help if I can! I can't help with the makeup side of things (my mom never taught me...I never did figure it out ) but I know lots of philosophical stuff and a TON about how to make your frikkin hair behave already lol. And I'm sure the others on the forum would be more than willing to offer advice as well .

    Congrats on your decision! I'm happy for you that you are taking steps to being who you want to be. Good luck with it
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  5. February 28th, 2015, 04:48 AM #5
    Pidgeon84
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    Well luckily Colorado tends to be a very progressive place. However, we are surrounded by our polar opposites on literally every side. So there is some residual neanderthalism (no offense to those living in those states ). But again it's good hear that there are other women who have the same questions about these things as I do. Makeup is one of the big things I am just clueless on. I need one of my friends to give me some serious lessons! And my hair, girl, forget about it. A mind of its own!

    Anyways, I so appreciate your kind words and well wishes innerflame!
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  6. February 28th, 2015, 05:28 AM #6
    J Anfinson
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    While I am somewhat of a neanderthal, I do wish you well, pidgeon. Everyone deserves happiness.

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  7. February 28th, 2015, 05:38 AM #7
    Pidgeon84
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    Crap! I um, have many neanderthal friends! *cringe*

    Really though, thank you. I totally agree, I'm not hurting anyone, but some folks don't like people like me being happy. But it seems like none of you guys here are like that. Which I really appreciate.
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  8. February 28th, 2015, 06:11 AM #8
    LeeC
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    I hope you find the peace and happiness you are looking for

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  9. February 28th, 2015, 06:25 AM #9
    Bruno Spatola
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    I couldn't wish luck upon a nicer person. You deserve to be happy, Pidg, and I'll be beaming fuzzy warm feelings to you all day tomorrow.

    Keep us posted.
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  10. February 28th, 2015, 06:36 AM #10
    Pidgeon84
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    Oh my god, Bruno. I'm tearing up a little bit! Thank you so much!
    "I like working with first time directors because they don't really know the rules yet. And therefore don't know any limits."
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