Moving On


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Thread: Moving On

  1. #1
    The Fox Smith's Avatar
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    Moving On

    First song, pretty short, just the lyrics as I don't have the equipment / programs / know how to perform it, record it and put it on soundcloud or something.

    ---

    I found every thing that I have ever wanted then threw it all away
    Can’t say I even tried, can’t say I ever tried
    Don’t deserve a second chance, sorry it had to turn out this way

    Been two years and you’re still so beautiful, if not more so
    I was just a boy, I promise I’ve changed
    Not sure what my promises mean to you any more
    But I swear you are my world, and I really mean that
    I have never dared lie about that

    I put away those games I played, locked up the masks where my secrets used to lie
    Just one last time
    Let us try
    It cannot be “right love, wrong time” forever
    I know you cannot trust me, but I know we’re complimentary
    So if you’ll let me be me, I am ready

    Because I can’t move on… - softly, repeat x3

    Because I can’t move on!
    (right when I’m about to, you come in and remind me)

    I can’t move on!
    (as if to tell me “soon”)

    Because I can’t move on!
    (as if to tell me “I still love you”)

    Oh I just can’t move on!
    (as if to say to me “please just wait”)

    Not entirely sure why, but I worry that it’s too late

  2. #2
    reads to me like an acoustic song..cool dude.
    The only one who can heal you is you.




  3. #3
    The Fox Smith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by escorial View Post
    reads to me like an acoustic song..cool dude.
    Thanks friend! ^_^ It's actually inspired by 90's emo (bands like Jimmy Eat World, Saves The Day, The Get Up Kids) but an acoustic version I actually was planning on doing first with a friend, as I don't have a band.

  4. #4
    The only thing that really jumped out to me that I would have written differently was the final line, but I could just be reading this with the wrong "tune" in my head - it's hard to tell without music ya know. In my head, the word "entirely" doesn't seem to work well, but I definitely could be seeing this wrong. I feel like personally I would word it either simply "I'm not sure why, but I worry that it's too late" or "I'm just not sure why, but I worry that it's too late". For some reason that seems to flow better to me than "entirely" - but again, I could just be "hearing" this in my head differently than it was meant to be heard.

    Otherwise I like it, and it's oddly relevant to how I feel right now about a situation of my own.

  5. #5
    The Fox Smith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by caseface99 View Post
    The only thing that really jumped out to me that I would have written differently was the final line, but I could just be reading this with the wrong "tune" in my head - it's hard to tell without music ya know. In my head, the word "entirely" doesn't seem to work well, but I definitely could be seeing this wrong. I feel like personally I would word it either simply "I'm not sure why, but I worry that it's too late" or "I'm just not sure why, but I worry that it's too late". For some reason that seems to flow better to me than "entirely" - but again, I could just be "hearing" this in my head differently than it was meant to be heard.

    Otherwise I like it, and it's oddly relevant to how I feel right now about a situation of my own.
    With the tune I'm using "I'm just not sure why, but I worry that it's too late" and my line both can work. I do however think actually that the way your line is worded is more suitable. A bit more straight-forward and forceful, especially for being the ending line to the song. It's a fast paced song, probably would only be 2:45 or somewhere around there. Acoustic will likely be longer, up somewhere around 3:45.

  6. #6
    If you ever record it be sure to post! Even just a rough recording, I know doing a real studio quality track takes a lot of equipment and software.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by caseface99 View Post
    If you ever record it be sure to post! Even just a rough recording, I know doing a real studio quality track takes a lot of equipment and software.
    I definitely will. ^_^

  8. #8
    Bravo Romeo. You've got sack to right that. Please be sure to introduce us to the final product - An Acoustic Emo.... Do it.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by davidtrounce View Post
    Bravo Romeo. You've got sack to right that. Please be sure to introduce us to the final product - An Acoustic Emo.... Do it.
    Thanks a lot man! And there's an idea. I'll get with my friend soon and talk about it.

  10. #10
    nice man
    i was surfing th web the i found this Meaningful Quotes for you, for motivation and inspiration

    why not post yours here ?

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