Results 1 to 8 of 8

Thread: Tacit

  1. #1


    His fingers hold my wrist, circled claw-like around the jutting bone there. I can almost pretend his hand is a little lower, that his fingers are laced into mine.

    And when he throws me into the pile of brown and curling tree leaves, if I shut my eyes tightly enough, I can just about fool myself that it’s a bed of blankets and pillows cushioning my frame, and not of dead foliage.

    We don’t do this often, romp around and muck about as children do. So it is a precious thing, if a bit juvenile, when we lie supine in the pile, side by side, gangly legs stretched up, reaching toward the few clouds that linger in the late afternoon glow, hovering to observe our togetherness.

    His toes, long and bony, curl and uncurl to shatter leaves into bits and pieces, and his flaxen hair that has grown long and wispy is tangled, matted to his face by a sheen of sweat.

    Sharp eyes give me a long side-glance; he’s caught me staring, but doesn’t ask what I’m looking at or inform me of my idiocy. Those lips, the ones I would so like to be covering my own, crick upward in a smile, more taunting than joyful. Fingers, long like his toes, reach for me, and I brace myself for a blow that does not come. Nimble digits slide underneath my shirt and it takes a second for it to sink in that he’s tickling me, nails scuttling like June bugs away from a broomstick over my flat stomach.

    The amusement is not stretched across his mouth, but it lights up in his eyes. Fat tears tumble down my cheeks as my jaw slackens with great heaves of laughter. I double over, a vain effort to shield my aching belly from scrabbling fingertips, but his hands, undeterred, move to my ribs. He treats the bones to the occasional biting pinch.

    I twitch just then. Something coils deep within my abdomen as his callused hands roam my torso more fervently. I shove him away from me because I know a boy isn’t supposed to feel this way about his best friend and because I don’t know what else to do.

    The smirk slips from his face and lands somewhere in the mound of leaves. And as he stalks away, I don’t bother searching for it. Just sit there, grinding dead leaves into dust with the heel of my palm, thinking of the day his hand will be a little lower, his fingers clammy as they lace into mine.
    Last edited by Blissful Lissy; September 23rd, 2011 at 10:01 PM. Reason: Formatting issue.

  2. #2
    This is beautiful. I can truly feel her longing. And it plays so well with the idea that girls are usually more mature, needier, and ready before boys. It's sweet and lovely.
    "and when we speak we are afraid
    our words will not be heard, nor welcomed
    but when we are silent we are still afraid
    So it is better to speak, remembering
    we were never meant to survive"
    Hidden Content (Hidden Content )

  3. #3
    This is really nice.... you had me guessing about the nature of the relationship up until the second last graph and then when I went back and read it again, it all fit together perfectly. Well done.

  4. #4
    Thanks very much for the feedback and kind words. ^^

  5. #5
    WF Veteran Sunny's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Canada until Hawaii
    I liked this! Beautiful, really.
    for kyle: Freel Barter Braby Hidden Content

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Chicago Suburb
    Really well done. Loved it! You led me on to wonder about several possibilities, and when the time came to grasp your intent, it was a lovely surprise.

  7. #7
    I like the ambiguity in this, which seems to reflect the conflict within the characters. One or two of the sentences went on for a little longer than I was expecting without a breath, but the style was good and enjoyable overall.

  8. #8
    New Member MissSuiYen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Warehouse 13, Univille, South Dakota
    Ooh, this is fantastic! Beautiful, concise imagery and great expression. It describes something that so many young gay boys go through, especially because they can stand to lose so much by admitting their feelings.


Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
This website uses cookies
We use cookies to store session information to facilitate remembering your login information, to allow you to save website preferences, to personalise content and ads, to provide social media features and to analyse our traffic. We also share information about your use of our site with our social media, advertising and analytics partners.