WritingForums.com - Hawke


  • Hawke

    by Published on February 23rd, 2012 10:56 AM
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    I give you bazz cargo.






    Thank you for joining us, bazz cargo. Please tell us about yourself.

    I'm a fifty-two year-old, ill-educated male with a bald spot. I drive everyone mad and have been described as 'mental.' (Thanks Bilston). I'm married, have a dog, and I wage slave in a factory for a pittance.


    When and why did you begin writing?

    When.

    Ever since I can remember I have told stories. Only relatively recently technology has enabled me to write them down. I have communication problems. I struggle to read and have poor coordination which reduces my writing to a scribble, especially when I am tired. Strictly speaking it is not dyslexia, but it has a lot in common, calling my condition dyslexia saves hours of explanation.

    Why?

    It's fun.


    How many hats do you have in your home?

    Three, a fedora and two woolly ones. Metaphorically: husband, dog's servant, D.I.Y.er, cook, ...
    by Published on February 5th, 2012 05:07 PM

    Once in a very long while the cosmos aligns and pleasant things happen. Perhaps someone somewhere didn’t do something, which didn’t cause something, which made someone else miss whatever it was. Maybe. Whatever. ...
    by Published on September 21st, 2011 07:52 PM
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    A huge thank you to our dear Like a Fox, Fuhrer, the judges, and everyone who entered! Thank you so much for the enjoyable reads!

    Right. Let's get to it...



    Rustgold - 17, 14, 12.5, 18 = 61.5 - Average = 15.375
    Bazz cargo - 19, 11.5, 19, 19 = 68.5 - Average = 17.125
    Ravensty - 15, 14, 16, 16 = 61 - Average = 15.25
    BabaYaga - 19, 17, 15.5, 18 = 69.5 - Average = 17.375
    DuKane - 19, 15, 11, 17 = 62 - Average = 15.5
    Eluixa - 20, 15, 12.5, 17 = 64.5 - Average = 16.125
    Anna Buttons - 19, 18, 17, 18 = 72 - Average = 18
    Morc44u - 20, 12, 11.5, 16 = 59.5 - Average = 14.875



    First Place - Anna Buttons!

    Second Place - BabaYaga!

    Third Place - Bazz Cargo!


    Congratulations to the winners and all of the entrants. Well done, everyone.

    Note: Any formatting problem in the following scores are completely my fault. Or my computer's fault. Or the internet's fault. They are not the judges fault.

    Also Note: If there are any errors or omissions, please PM me asap. Thank you.

    ***

    AvA's Scores


    Rustgold - 14

    I thought you could have done more with the words at your disposal, but the concept you put forth was interesting.


    bazz cargo - 19


    I really loved this. Cleverly composed with a wicked ending. Some sentences would have been better if split into two, though.
    ...
    by Published on August 15th, 2011 12:58 PM
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    A huge thank you to our dear Like a Fox, the judges, and everyone who entered!

    Right. Let's get to it...


    Flapjack - 17, 12, 16, 18 = 63 - Average = 15.75
    Dreamworx - 18, 13, 16, 16 = 63 Average = 15.75
    Crazed Scribe -16, 11, 15.5, 16 = 58.5 - Average = 14.625
    Baba Yaga - 19, 14, 19.5, 16 = 68.5 - Average = 17.125
    bazz cargo - 17, 15, 18, 18 = 68 - Average = 17
    DuKane - 18, 16, 17, 16 = 67 - Average = 16.75
    Bilston Blue - 18, 17, 19, 20 = 74 - Average = 18.5
    ChicagoHeart - 17, 12, 17, 20 = 66 - Average = 16.5
    spider8 - N/A - Judge
    alanmt - 17, 14, 18, 20 = 69 - Average = 17.25
    Tom - 16, 11, 18, 19 = 64 - Average = 16
    InsanityStrickenWriter - 16, 13, 16.5, 19 = 64.5 - Average = 16.125
    Anna Buttons - 19, 19, 19, 19 = 76 - Average = 19
    Rustgold - 17, 14, 18.5, 19 = 68.5 - Average = 17.125
    morc44u - N/A
    Monkey Doctor - N/A



    And the winners are:


    First Place - Anna Buttons!

    Second Place - Bilston Blue!

    Third Place - Alanmt!


    Congratulations to all the winners and all of the entrants. Thank you so much for the enjoyable reads!

    Note: Any formatting problem in the following scores are completely my fault. Or my computer's fault. Or the internet's fault. They are not the judges fault.

    Also Note: If there are any errors or omissions, please PM me asap. Thank you.

    ***

    Eluixa's Scores
    I enjoy your efforts immensely! So many entries and you are writing so well that I found this very hard to judge, and found myself relying on impression, impact and eloquence. Thank you for having me.


    Peaceful Priorities by Flapjack
    16/20
    My understanding of this was very tongue in cheek, so ah, hoping that is how it was meant. Really liked the bit about the toast. That was my favorite part, even though I’d taken a jaunt over to Wikipedia and was envisioning the true catastrophe, whilst reading about the benefits of a super toaster. Which while I cringe at the history here, if you knew me, you’d know that toast is one of my favorite things ever. Cleanly written, and lightly humorous, but an approach that feels like déjà vu. I think you could step out a bit farther on your limb, you are quite capable.

    Dreaming On the Danube River by Dreamworks95
    16/20
    This story set me on a long course of research, and I learned a lot I did not know before, one link leading to another and the conclusion being, that while your prose flows as always, you are too much a sweet child to convincingly get into the head of a psychopath, even a young one. I wonder if this would have worked better for me in third person for that reason. It may be that I am too biased in his case and cannot make the leap you’re your ambitious artist to future mass murderer. He sounds like a petulant ...
    by Published on March 30th, 2011 08:52 AM
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    Perhaps you’ll remember in the Newsletter my mentioning a lovely lady in my childhood neighborhood who gave more to others than she gave to herself. She was a part of the mother’s telegraph line, and had an open door policy for all of the kids and a cup of coffee for all of the adults. A genuinely warm and caring lady. A trustworthy lady. A ‘salt of the earth’ and ‘hub of the wheel’ type who’d lightheartedly pish posh all compliments.

    I give you Foxee.



    Thank you for joining us, Foxee. Please tell us about yourself.
    I am an American so I have contraband 'z's for those who would like to swap out their 's's. I'm an accomplished procrastinator with many years of practice, unfortunately experience in this area hasn't taught me a thing. I have been guilty of concocting poetry without a license though my writing usually ends up being flash fiction or short story length. RPG's (Role-Playing Games) are somewhere between a guilty pleasure and an irritant for me. My talents are ...
    by Published on March 26th, 2011 01:46 AM
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    Back in the day, small town living was a bit different than what might be the norm now. Locks were rarely used, everyone kept an eye on everyone else's kids, and if someone had unexpected company, a neighbor could usually be counted on to rap on the back door and slip the unprepared hostess a scavenged-from-the-freezer tray of goodies. There was also an unofficial version of the Welcome Wagon… and I say unofficial because it wasn’t an organization at all, but instead, kind and wonderful neighborhood ladies who, two and three at a time, would present those new to the neighborhood with saran wrap-covered casseroles, cakes and finger foods. It was nice. It ...
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