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one last bee in an ageing bonnet...dithering...

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It never ceases to amaze me how I spend so much time pondering the so very mundane which, ultimately, only serves to exacerbate, a wish/desire/call it what you might, to do one certain thing thing that I would love to do before I leave this earth. I just noticed that I said "to do" and not "to have done" so maybe even now, I harbour some small hope but it really is just wishful thinking.

Today, this morning, was just another Sunday no different to any other. I slept late and woke up feeling a tad delicate, thanks cheapo cider, in no hurry to rise without shining, comfortable in the knowledge that although Sunday, for me, is a shopping day, I had until one pm. to actually get drag myself out of bed, take a shower, and get my arse into gear, as the store doesn't close until three.

Every time I return from my Sunday shop, having walked back into town at break-neck speed busting for a pee and then ohhh yes! relieving myself and my poor old bladder at the public loo, one of these days it's going to be closed, I just know it, I resolve to go into the public loo on my way TO the store so as not to place said bladder in such a awkward position but I never do. When I'm getting ready to leave home I do so after finishing a mug of coffee. " I'll go when I've drunk this" I tell the lady of the house.

One of these days dither... One of these days.

And so it is or rather, was.

I've mentioned my dismay at how I seem to be always dropping things, well? This morning, as I put my pound piece into and withdrew my shopping trolley, you wouldn't believe the trouble I had pulling it, walking backwards between two rows of joined up trolleys, clanging banging on either side making a complete pig's ear of it, I get so angry with myself sometimes, and then, as I entered the store, I couldn't help but notice a man carrying two shopping baskets, one in each hand, having to put one or the other down as he shopped. Hadn't he seen? Wasn't he aware of? shopping trolleys? The things people do. Whatever.

Every thing else was pretty much same as though. I shopped, I paid, and, having put my trolley back with the others and got somebody's pound piece back in return for mine, I headed home.

There's a three way roundabout on the main road that I have to cross to and from the store. It's always busy on Sunday morning, due, in no small way to the store where I shop, but today it was gridlocked.

Having once been a motorist, I know and appreciate what a pain in the arse public road crossings can be, they are necessary on such busy roads, but a pain the the arse none the less and so, when I approach the crossing from which ever side that I happen to be on, I'm always looking to avoid pressing that button whereby the little green walking man shows on the mini-screen and the traffic grinds to a halt. Going TO the store I was able to dart across both lanes without holding up the flow of traffic but not so going home. Like I said, the traffic was heavy, gridlock wouldn't be over stating the situation, and so, I stood there, facing the on coming traffic, sort of shrugging, arms half raised, in an attempt so say " Look! I really don't want to press this button, but I've got to cross. Eh?" Well? One motorist DID get what I was trying to say and put a hand up waving to let me cross the road. All it takes is a little thought and consideration sometimes. In a word, co-operation. Humanity, or rather, common sense, won the day. I didn't want to stop the flow of traffic, he really DIDN'T want to see a red light, job done.

So what has all this got to do with a bee in my bonnet? Everything and yet, nothing. Depending on your point of view.

"BUCKET-LIST" What the hell is that supposed to mean? What actually IS a bucket-list and who ever coined such an expression. Can anybody tell me the origin please?

Well, for what it's worth, I don't have, never HAD such a thing, but there is just one thing that I would love to do before I call it a day. Just one thing, a dream that, even now, especially now, could be realised and every time I make that walk back into town it gnaws at me, it really... gnaws.

I always dreamed of walking around Great Britain. Think about that.... Get to the coast from where I live and just follow it round, totally circumnavigating GB, on foot. Well now, let's put that into perspective here.

1... I'm well on my way to seventy, just over halfway through my seventh decade and getting up a decent head of steam.
2... Logistics,planning. You can't, I can't/won't/would never just dive into something like this. Food, a change of clothes, somewhere to sleep, where would I begin to even think of such an enterprise? And yet, the dream lives, demands....GNAWS.

I was deeply moved, influenced by, the writings of Orwell but in this day an age, never was there more cause for concern regarding personal safety.

And that's a lot of miles. I could walk some, and bus some. Walk enough so as not to detract from the aim of walking GB but to make it to pre-booked b&b's en-route. And to write a diary as I traveled, I even thought of a title, simply....dithering...

It's ridiculous, the very thought, isn't it?

dither...

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I'm probably just kidding myself, fantasies of an old man. Retirement is approaching fast, as the new year dawns I will have retired, I'm in pretty decent nick at the moment, and I'd just like to do something come Springtime. We shall see. "Backpacker, or perhaps back​packing, dither...
I wonder what the wife would think, mmm.
Happy to see the back of me hopefully.

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Updated September 25th, 2019 at 04:22 PM by dither

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  1. Plasticweld's Avatar
    The best vacation I ever had was one I did no planning for. I thought about doing it 2pm the day before left 5am the next morning. A motorcycle trip around Nova Scotia. I ate when I was hungry, found a place to stay when I was tired. I took the ferry over from Bar Harbor Maine. I had heard at the time it was the fastest ferry in the world. I took no maps just followed the coast winding my way back through New Brunswick, Maine, New Hampshire. Vt. and then through northern NY. I just followed my nose. I had a great trip, with no worries. I was never late to where I had to go, and it did not matter how far I went 2000 miles in 5 days. Best trip ever. Hard to beat a trip with no plans. I say just go, what's the worst that will happen is that you will come home early....sounds like a great adventure, or one I would like to take.
  2. dither's Avatar
    Out shopping earlier I wondered, why ? As I walked glancing at the surroundings, shops houses people in streets, all pretty much same as, but it's all pretty much same as the world over, isn't it? What's there to see? And then I thought of the Albert memorial in London. Seeing that was quite an eye-opener. People.... I don't "do" people....They're a totally alien species. Wherever I went, were I ever able to set out on the above, I'd go with head bowed, scurrying from town to town, just hoping to stay safe.
    Maybe when I DO retire I shall put this to bed once and for but for now...... yeah.

    dither...
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