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Winston

Earth... Whatever.

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I didn't even know it was a thing.

A couple days ago, there was this thing they called "Earth Hour". If you're not "aware", the deal is for all you virtue signaling peeps to turn your lights out for an hour to show "...solidarity with the planet..." or some such nonsense. At first, I was upset that no one invited me to this event, and I resolved to turn every light on to max in protest. Then, a baseball game came on, and I thankfully forgot.

Later, for some unknown reason, I had a moment of introspection regarding this politically correct charade. I already lead a pretty damn "Earth friendly" lifestyle. I take public transportation to work, and when I don't, I ride a motorcycle that gets over 60 mpg. Y'know, just like Che' . Except mine gets better mileage, and doesn't break down all the time. Made by our capitalist friends at Honda.
I pack a lunch in my reusable box. No take-out containers. And no need for compostable coffee cups. I've been drinking out of the same coffee mug for over ten years now.
We grow some of our own food, although Gaia's winged friends usually get more than we do. My son's girlfriend is a vegan, so that's worth some points as well, right?

I do things like drink day-old coffee, because...why not? It's still good, just reheat it. Throw out half a pot? Crazy.
We eat leftovers. There was a ham in our 'fridge that was way past that silly "sell by" date. But we have Obama care. If I get sick, you all can pay my bills. Thanks.

Yes, I'm damaged. My grandmother lived through the Great Depression and taught me to be frugal. Our income has consistently been lower middle class, and yet we live well. I don't miss Starbucks, or lunch a Chipotle. And if my tightwad lifestyle makes your mythical Mother Earth happy, I'm happy for the two of you.

I'm sure I could do more. And I apologize in advance for not giving a rat's arse.
Earth Month, Earth Day, Hour, Nano-Second... whatever. I'm with George Carlin. The Earth wanted plastic bags. It spawned us to create them. Now that our job is done, the planet will dispose of us.

So why bother acting like some self-righteous jerk on the way out? Just live like you should, and enjoy yourself.
Peace.

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Comments

  1. Kevin's Avatar
    Everyone's for the earth. There's some death cults that can't wait for it all to 'end', but other than that, everyone's for the earth.

    I remember there was a scene in that movie Independence Day, you know the one where big giant flying saucers appeared above all the major cities? And then there was that one stripper chick friend-of who grabbed her little protest sign and was up on the top of the skyscraper dancing around "take me!"
    And then * bzzzzott!- ka-blOOOOM! *

    Lets all turn off our lights for a minute.
  2. Winston's Avatar
    Everyone's for the earth
    Yeah Kev, but it's kinda like saying "Everyone loves warm puppies".
    Just another case of meaningless rhetorical ego stroking. Because liking warm puppies makes you a good person.
    Tomorrow I'm wearing my "I Love Warm Puppies" ribbon. April 2nd is the day set aside for that. You should wear yours, too.
  3. escorial's Avatar
    Earth will heal itself long after humanity has gone....hope I get the last post on WF
  4. midnightpoet's Avatar
    Boy I thought I was cynical until I read you guys. Welcome to the club.
  5. Kevin's Avatar
    I blame it on the folkies
    https://youtu.be/4MTyqoigiso
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