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neighbours suicide

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Few weeks back I was sitting in my mother's and a neighbour of hers parked on the drive and I watched as he got out his car and threw a Costa cup over a wall onto open land...the other night he hung himself on one of the trees there...story was that he thought he had cancer but he found out it was diabetes...he was so stressed waiting for results and looking on the internet he went into a depression..lost weight an that was it...reached his breaking point and left a wife,kids an 3 grandkids to cope with the fallout....

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  1. Winston's Avatar
    Stories like this always make me sad and angry.
    I could just never wrap my head around the narcissism that makes a person think that they can end their pain, and leave others in pain.
    A few years back, a brother-in-law overdosed on pain killers. I think the coroner ruled it as an "accident", for insurance purposes. But my nephews and sis-in-law are seriously messed up now. There were problems before he killed himself, and for the survivors, they are now only worse.
    I want to have sympathy when I hear of suicides like your neighbor. Instead, it's mostly just anger.
  2. Kevin's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Winston
    Stories like this always make me sad and angry.
    I could just never wrap my head around the narcissism that makes a person think that they can end their pain, and leave others in pain.
    A few years back, a brother-in-law overdosed on pain killers. I think the coroner ruled it as an "accident", for insurance purposes. But my nephews and sis-in-law are seriously messed up now. There were problems before he killed himself, and for the survivors, they are now only worse.
    I want to have sympathy when I hear of suicides like your neighbor. Instead, it's mostly just anger.
    for me there is a list of actions taken that I have difficulty following- suicide, drug addiction, cutting. I'm not angry, but I struggle to get them. I think there is something to get.
    I once knew a guy that got diagnosed with Lou Gherigs, and right away he shot himself. I can get that one, I think.

    Another one, he shot himself after years of struggling to pull himself out of bankruptcy. A lot of family were sponging, or, relying upon him. He was a high roller at one time, for a long time, hundreds of employees. There were a lot of expectations put on him.
  3. escorial's Avatar
    Another neighbour 30 odd years ago was found dead in a hotel room hundreds of miles away....his mother never came to terms with it....
  4. Kevin's Avatar
    These are people I know personally. You, for instance, are on my screen 16- 28" away from me, so I'd probably care.

    Nope, nope, nope, I thought about it , and I would definitely care. So none of that.
    Updated February 18th, 2019 at 10:53 PM by Kevin
  5. escorial's Avatar
    The number of times I've though over time...what's the point and done some strange things that left me on the edge...that I feel must be so far away from being suicidal or is it just the next step...I must admit I'm facinated by the subject
  6. dither's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Kevin
    for me there is a list of actions taken that I have difficulty following- suicide, drug addiction, cutting. I'm not angry, but I struggle to get them. I think there is something to get.
    I once knew a guy that got diagnosed with Lou Gherigs, and right away he shot himself. I can get that one, I think.

    Another one, he shot himself after years of struggling to pull himself out of bankruptcy. A lot of family were sponging, or, relying upon him. He was a high roller at one time, for a long time, hundreds of employees. There were a lot of expectations put on him.
    Winston,
    I couldn't DIS-agree more.
    Too MY mind, suicide is to be celebrated. They've cracked it. They've beaten the system. And will no longer suffer what ailed them.

    I'm sorry.
  7. escorial's Avatar
    in a local shop today the woman behind the till was talking inbetween pips to a customer she seemed to know and a guy who saved her life...me mum died...we were so close and i was depressed about that and i was also going through the change so my hormones were everywhere...i told the doctor about thoughts and the things i was doing but it was him who saved me....i stopped listening at this point..weird how things can connect when you come across stuff....
  8. Smith's Avatar
    One ought be slow to berate suicide, or those who are suicidal / self-harming, until one can understand it themselves. Read about it, research it, but be careful: if you genuinely seek to feel what they feel and think the way that they think (which is not the way that you think), you will. And it won't be pleasant.

    Your confusion and disbelief about how one can get to that place is literally identical to their inability to understand you, and how you aren't at that place. I would know from having been there.
  9. escorial's Avatar
    i've met many people who have contemplated suicide...not one so far has reached a breaking point..there all still here...i know people on self destruct mode who are pushing their bodies/mind to the limit.....lets say we can all find ourselves at the i've been there to a personal degree and i've talked to survivors of suicidal attempts...some it was a cry for help and others it was..i'm out of here..there still around...when i ask what made you go there..after all the backstory the final question is would you try again and they all say..i don't know...
  10. dither's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by escorial
    i've met many people who have contemplated suicide...not one so far has reached a breaking point..there all still here...i know people on self destruct mode who are pushing their bodies/mind to the limit.....lets say we can all find ourselves at the i've been there to a personal degree and i've talked to survivors of suicidal attempts...some it was a cry for help and others it was..i'm out of here..there still around...when i ask what made you go there..after all the backstory the final question is would you try again and they all say..i don't know...
    I don't accept "suicide attempts".
    They are, as you say, a cry for help.
  11. epimetheus's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by dither
    I don't accept "suicide attempts".
    They are, as you say, a cry for help.
    Bit of a blanket statement. There are plenty of 'genuine' suicide attempts that get interupted for one reason or another, and plenty of 'cries for help' that end in death.
  12. dither's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by epimetheus
    Bit of a blanket statement. There are plenty of 'genuine' suicide attempts that get interupted for one reason or another, and plenty of 'cries for help' that end in death.
    It's a tricky one epimetheus, I get what you're saying.
    People will butt in sometimes and thwart one. And of course, a cry for help can backfire. But in the main, in this day and age, if a person really wants to end their life....
    Having said that, I suppose with some methods, a miscalculation is possible, I won't elaborate. And yes I accept that my comment is a bit of a "blanket statement".
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