Hidden tomb - Blogs - Writing Forums


View RSS Feed

H.Brown

Hidden tomb

Rate this Entry
Follow down the golden path,
'tween the trees that always laugh,
passed the singing daffodils,
into fields of swallowed pills.
Upon the stage I wait and wait,
'till the day you push the gate,
through open stone of memory,
at the end you'll surely see,
this glass tomb that you built,
where my body softly wilts.

Submit "Hidden tomb" to Digg Submit "Hidden tomb" to del.icio.us Submit "Hidden tomb" to StumbleUpon Submit "Hidden tomb" to Google

Categories
Uncategorized

Comments

  1. RhythmOvPain's Avatar
    Holy shit, this is good.
  2. H.Brown's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by RhythmOvPain
    Holy shit, this is good.
    Thanks, I think I'm getting better at this poetry malarkey lol. i seem to be liking the fairy tale theme right now, can not decide whether to write a novel, with these poems included in it, or to see if I can make an anthology of fairy themed poems.
  3. escorial's Avatar
    'tween...'till... can't recall seeing these words abbreviated this way before..is this your own thing..shortening words an meaning always grabs my attention..
  4. H.Brown's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by escorial
    'tween...'till... can't recall seeing these words abbreviated this way before..is this your own thing..shortening words an meaning always grabs my attention..
    I don't know esc, I thought it was pretty normal. It's how I speak/say these words in real life. I an't wait 'tillI...
  5. RhythmOvPain's Avatar
    Apostrophes make ERRTHANG better.
  6. escorial's Avatar
    Writing how u speak adds to the flavour for me an pushing the boundaries of all aspects of writing is the way to go...although I'm not too keen on accent's or say works like clockwork orange...but more of a stylized approach mixed with the norm..tiss n till in conjunction with grammar works for me...
  7. H.Brown's Avatar
    I'm glad it does, pushing boundries is also good it helps you grow. I wouldn't be where I am now with pushing my own. I think it works in the poem and glad that others agree.
  8. escorial's Avatar
    Others are often the minority but the long run can produce a wider appeal
This website uses cookies
We use cookies to store session information to facilitate remembering your login information, to allow you to save website preferences, to personalise content and ads, to provide social media features and to analyse our traffic. We also share information about your use of our site with our social media, advertising and analytics partners.