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New Year, New Me

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Firstly, how the heck have I been here for more than 2 years?! Like, feels like yesterday since I joined. Well, as they say, "Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana".

I 'spose it has been a while since I posted here. I've occasionally popped onto the site to see what's going on. Looks like its kept on keeping on. Used to be that I'd check this site daily. It had become a coping mechanism I guess.

Anyways, a lot has happened since I've last wrote here. I figured I'd update those of you that knew me back in the day as to what's been up. Honestly, though, I don't really care if anyone reads this. I'm typing just to type.

So, uhh, last year. That was a real shitshow. Glad it's all over with. I learned a lot of things about myself, some things that were pretty useful. Break-ups suck. But I do know now that a lot of the problems I had last year were at least partially my fault. For example, I struggled in college because I never really knew what hard work actually means. I'd managed to coast through high school with few issues, and as a result, the moment I was expected to actually put in effort I dropped the ball. That knowledge has helped me figure out how to better handle things in the future.

I've since left school. I had failed 3/4 of my classes. When I say failed, it was like 30s and lower. Like I friggen' bombed em. I decided it was better to cut my losses and take some time to figure out what I actually wanted to do. I didn't want to waste thousands of dollars on a degree I didn't want to do. I mean, sure, computer science was always cool to me, I just didn't know if I wanted to work at it.

Even though I quit school, I had made the error of signing a lease for an apartment near campus. A friend of mine needed a roommate and at the time I assumed I'd still be in school the next year. Plus I couldn't really bear the idea of having to live with my parents as a failed student. Too many people would know me. It'd be awkward to explain to the juniors that looked up to me that I was in fact a college dropout. So I spent the last half of the summer looking for jobs in town so I could afford rent. I lucked out. A local theatre was hiring kitchen staff. They called me for an interview like the day after my application went through. Was a hired dishpit dipshit the next day.

Yeah, I know. Dishwasher. Glamorous job right. Lemme tell you, I've had more kinds of food and chemicals splashed on me than is probably healthy. I can't even look at queso anymore cos that shit is the worst. But damn, this job has taught me a lot. Most importantly, how to work hard and that I can work hard. There's something about manual labor that, for me at least, makes me feel like I've achieved something. That's the biggest difference between now and last year. I actually feel like I'm doing something. Making headway. Now that the Star Wars rush has calmed down I have a shot at moving to other portions of the kitchen and learning other kinds of jobs. I have a goal now. I want to move to the back of house bar. And even now, if for some reason they don't need me anymore I have applicable skills for other restaurants. It's nice to know that I am hireable.

One of my biggest fears last year was that I didn't have the necessary skills to make a job last. My longest job at the time was barely three months at a grocery. I've worked twice that now. My goal is to have a year here to put on my resume.

Creatively, I'm still working on drawing. I've got a long way to go before I'm satisfied with my art style. My solution is to study more. From references and anatomy. I'll feel more confident when I am able to freehand more often. I still want to make a webcomic. I have started doing some photography around town. Nothing groundbreaking but it's fun. I'm planning on taking a trip out to the Grand Canyon or Rocky Mountain Nat'l Park for an outdoor photo sesh.

In relation to the comic, I've taken up writing again. I'm starting small. 2000 words before I go to bed. It's absolutely terrible. I can't even write how bad it is. Since I've left school I've become less good at expressing things written down. I dun' rite gud. But it's a start. I'm trying to not edit too much while I write but it's a struggle. I'll get there eventually. I can't post anything here tho, as it's technically fan-fiction. It's real lame, based off the Fallout New Vegas and Fallout 3 and 4 game universe. Honestly, as I type that out I'm realizing how dumb it is. But hey, for every amazing idea there's a trash one. I'm just taking the hit so you guys can have all the great ideas, lol.

I don't have too much of a long term goal, but I think I am ready to go back to school. I may study restaurant management and try to open up a bar. Or I might go for a technical certification at a comm college. Either way, the question is no longer what I want to do, it's what do I want to work at doing.

Damn... that was a BIG block o' text. TL;DR: I'm okay, shit's goin good (so far) and most surprisingly I'm actually writing. Plus I cut all my hair off, it looks badass.

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  1. midnightpoet's Avatar
    Ah, the trials and tribulations of youth...

    Seriously, hope you find your place in life, I stumbled into mine a year after college. Carry on.

  2. dither's Avatar
    Hang in there 97 and good luck.
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