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  1. Neetu's Avatar
    I've always been a strong believer in responsible parenthood. I know it is not always possible to be the perfect or even a good parent due to so many different circumstances in life. But if you cannot give the best of yourself to a child you give birth to, it would be better not to give birth at all. We have all the resources available to us to make informed choices, yet so many women and men don't. Mothers who are themselves traumatized, fathers who are reckless, etc, and the cycle continues from one generation to the next. No child should have to suffer because their parent suffered because it won't be surprising then if the child grows up passing on his/her suffering to the next offspring. I know it can't always be prevented, but if more people could stop and think what it means to raise a child and ask themselves if they're willing to take it on, it would reduce the pain to both the parent and the child.
    Giving birth is easy. Giving someone a life is much harder. And it takes some sacrifice of our own selfish agenda.
  2. Greyson's Avatar
    @theglasshouse, you're right about the last part for sure. i know she had a rather traumatic childhood, and a lot of her disorders arise from that. it's the getting there, the accepting of "i feel bad" but also not letting her get away with the abuse. I'm working on it though, along side a therapist. i appreciate all the kind words here. thank you all so much!
  3. Greyson's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Neetu
    greyson, please see my apology note in my first comment - I am so sorry!
    No worries, please! a totally understandable mistake on your part thank you for the supportive words!
  4. Theglasshouse's Avatar
    I suffer from a mood disorder (schizoaffective). I met one person with borderline personality disorder once. It seemed this person was a victim of abuse. I don't know much about it. They could use therapy as I saw one in nami which is a free organization for people with illnesses (located in the United States in every state with a free therapist). I suffer from a mood disorder that only becomes unstable after a lot of stress or depression. You will have better days I feel. Not everyone may be agreeable. But it's not her fault she is the way she is.
    Updated May 15th, 2020 at 12:47 AM by Theglasshouse
  5. River Rose's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Neetu
    Iím so sorry, dither. Thatís not a normal mother and sadly, there are women who donít have a naturally developed maternal instinct. You deserved better.


    Oops, my apologies, greyson! I meant to type your name above, instead I wrote "dither". It was a total slip of my mental train, off the tracks, unfortunately. I only just realized what I had typed.
    I totally agree w Neetu. Itís never the childís fault. Not an adult child, not a small child. Some women are have been abused themselves or as Neetu stated just lack a mothers instinct. They become narcissistic and play the victim to their own children. I apologize for her behavior. All children no matter their age deserve better. Much better. Hugs you.
  6. Neetu's Avatar
    greyson, please see my apology note in my first comment - I am so sorry!
  7. Neetu's Avatar
    I’m so sorry, dither. That’s not a normal mother and sadly, there are women who don’t have a naturally developed maternal instinct. You deserved better.


    Oops, my apologies, greyson! I meant to type your name above, instead I wrote "dither". It was a total slip of my mental train, off the tracks, unfortunately. I only just realized what I had typed.
    Updated May 12th, 2020 at 01:59 PM by Neetu
  8. Ma'am's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by dither
    I did that, and now I have no-one.

    Life eh?
    I know a few people who seem to turn to their pets, rather than people, for companionship. (Dr. Phil, who apparently knows everything, calls it "relating down.") I used to think they were kind of strange but now I totally get it. People can be so disappointing but your cat or dog needs you and always thinks you're fabulous. Unless it's a cat but even then it still needs you.
    Updated May 11th, 2020 at 03:00 PM by Ma'am
  9. dither's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by Ma'am
    I cut people out of my life who bring nothing to it but unnecessary misery, and also their personal drama agents. There is really no good option but that's the best one for me. Good luck with it.
    I did that, and now I have no-one.

    Life eh?
  10. Ma'am's Avatar
    I cut people out of my life who bring nothing to it but unnecessary misery, and also their personal drama agents. There is really no good option but that's the best one for me. Good luck with it.
    Updated May 11th, 2020 at 12:09 AM by Ma'am
  11. Gumby's Avatar
    Just know you're not alone in how you feel. Your mom sounds very similar to mine. She just recently passed away and I still have some very conflicted emotions to deal with. I will tell you what I have realized. Some people teach you wonderful lessons in life by setting a good example of how to be and some show you how not to be. That is the lesson I have learned from my mom. I couldn't change how she acted, no matter what I ever did. But I can control how her actions have impacted my life and how I react going forward.
    Updated May 11th, 2020 at 12:32 PM by Gumby
  12. Smith's Avatar
    I will say that while the young-and-healthy have nothing to worry about, that going to work at this time could get them sick, and therefore somebody that they live with could get sick who DOES have to be worried.

    At the same time, there are lot of people right now who are out of a job, and they might live paycheck to paycheck, or at best have enough to survive for a month. Obviously I hope that they can reach out and get some sort of assistance; I have watched people in my town band together and go shopping for the elderly or those in quarantine, for example. But in terms of raw financial support, in many cases I think there's not much that can be done because so many people are in the same boat. And if they're not in the boat now, they're about to be.

    So while I'm not saying that I think Starbucks actually has my best interest in mind by doing everything they can to stay open, the result is that *for now* I don't have to worry about how I'm going to eat, not get evicted, or afford gas. Likewise for my roommate who works at a donut-and-coffee shop.

    The economic repercussions looming in the near future, and already being felt in some small ways, is pretty worrisome. But I've had enough paranoia, fear, and panic for one year.
  13. escorial's Avatar
    Give peas a chance
  14. -xXx-'s Avatar
    +
  15. -xXx-'s Avatar
    OO OO
    oo..-*-..
    OO OO
    *pesky limits*
    *imagine evrything of max of 4*
    *um, pls.n.thx*

  16. Greyson's Avatar
    Iím glad it was thought provoking! Letting it out, bit by bit, seems to work wonders. I still have to find that Seven Samurai sceneÖitís been my main source of inspiration for doing this work. Glad to hear you got that anger out before the discussion, and that you didnít turn it inwards again. There are many scars people hide within themselves from repressed emotions, and that can be just as unhealthy as expressing everything.
    hope youíre doing well with your work and that you are slowly figuring out healthy and safe ways to address your anger. Thanks for stopping by as usual 😊


    Quote Originally Posted by Smith
    I'm the same way. It's taken me a long time to learn to be pro-active about how I'm feeling.

    There's so much to unpack here. This is really a thought-provoking blog post, truly.

    I don't want to hijack it, but I will say that when I realized I couldn't keep blowing up on everything and everyone, I turned it in on myself. I think that was a major factor that led to depression.

    Which just further serves your point that finding an outlet - carefully venting, playing a video game, or *exercise* - is absolutely necessary, because we've established what the alternatives are. It either is unleashed upon somebody else, and / or you become self-destructive.

    Unless you think you're just never going to be angry. If somebody achieves that and never feels anger, then more power to them I guess.

    Let me tell you. The conversation I had with the property manager about some shelves that broke in our fridge went a lot better since I got out all of my viciousness and snarkyness before hand.
  17. Greyson's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by -xXx-
    ;P
  18. Smith's Avatar
    I'm the same way. It's taken me a long time to learn to be pro-active about how I'm feeling.

    There's so much to unpack here. This is really a thought-provoking blog post, truly.

    I don't want to hijack it, but I will say that when I realized I couldn't keep blowing up on everything and everyone, I turned it in on myself. I think that was a major factor that led to depression.

    Which just further serves your point that finding an outlet - carefully venting, playing a video game, or *exercise* - is absolutely necessary, because we've established what the alternatives are. It either is unleashed upon somebody else, and / or you become self-destructive.

    Unless you think you're just never going to be angry. If somebody achieves that and never feels anger, then more power to them I guess.

    Let me tell you. The conversation I had with the property manager about some shelves that broke in our fridge went a lot better since I got out all of my viciousness and snarkyness before hand.
  19. -xXx-'s Avatar
  20. Greyson's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by River Rose
    Blizzards come in sometimes when we least expect a storm. Take shelter. Treat yourself well. Be kind to yourself. Take comfort in the fact that all storms pass. Making u stronger for surviving the storm.
    you're right, thank you it's easy to forget that one can take shelter and comfort during such storms; we're not required to weather it alone to prove anything. i appreciate the read and the kind words
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