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Once Upon a Time...

I've always loved writing. When I was a small child, I had an old computer in my room. There were no games on that computer, which was fine by me, because the only program I ever even opened was Wordpad. I would sit there for hours and dream up worlds and characters and mysteries. I would send my three cats on crazy adventures. I would write about my life and change certain things. But then my mother, without me knowing it, printed one of my stories and showed it to all the teachers at my elementary school, where she was also a teacher. I was so embarrassed when my teacher started talking to me about that story that I never wrote anything again.

I would often get the desire to write, but I would always tell myself that I couldn't do it. "You're too young," or "You'll never finish anything," or "You'll just embarrass yourself again."

Now, heading into my senior year of college, I really regret all those years desiring to write but not allowing myself to. I still desire to write, but still come up with the same excuses. Recently, I've decided to do something about it. At the beginning of the year, I decided for a New Years' Resolution that I was going to write something every day. I even told a good friend that I wanted to be a writer and that I was going to start writing, which was a big moment for me, because I had never told that to anyone before. Unfortunately, as most New Years' Resolutions go, it lasted a mere three days.

But about a week ago I decided that I'm ready to get serious about my writing aspirations. I have realized that this is not a desire that's going to go away, no matter how hard I try to get rid of it. I'm ready to write with joy, and free of embarrassment.

The problem now is my imagination. After several years of forcing myself not to create these worlds, my imagination is not anything like it used to be. I'm having a hard time coming up with ideas for stories. I want to write, but I just don't know what to write.

Since I made the decision to start writing, I have written one short story, which is posted in the workshop on this forum. But since then, I've not written anything. I want to stick true to my commitment to write something, anything, every day. But I feel like that one short story took everything I have.

Thats why I'm here! I joined this forum to become a part of a community that can inspire me and encourage me to continue writing. I need to hear positive voices instead of my own negative voice, constantly telling me I can't.

I have started a journey to becoming a writer. As I progress, I will update this blog, which may or may not be just a way for me to procrastinate writing. But I guess writing about my desire to write is still writing something!

God bless.


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