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My Vice

I’m a snacker of note
I stuff it all down my throat
The sweet, the salty and sour
Give me more cheese
On bread if you please
For while snacking I cannot be dour

When I’m feeling the need,
For a nibble or feed
I Indulge it, without doubt or shame.
Indulgence my creed,
Salt and sugar I’ll bleed,
Love the feel of that crap in my veins

A chocolate digestive,
is really suggestive,
when dunked in a nice cup of tea.
Mince pies are so festive,
I’d really feel blessed if,
Santa sends sack loads to me.

Just give me a crisp,
I don’t care if you lisp,
Thalt and Vinegar, thmokey bacon or plain.
Ignore the thoft talkers
Just get me some Walkers,
and bugger the kilos we’ll gain.

The world’s immaterial,
when I’m craving a cereal,
afloat in its white, creamy milk.
Cry plague on the doubters,
the calorie counters,
and all of their miserable ilk.

Bugger my gut,
and the size of my butt,
when I’m feeling the need for some toast.
I lash on the butter,
and feel my heart flutter,
When offered more jam by my host.

Snackaholics anonymous,
a group that I met,
meet in a caff by a lake.
Though weight goals I set,
On the outcome don’t bet,
Coz I joined for the biscuits at break

I’ll be a snacker,
out loud and proud,
a consumer of all that is tasty.
I’ll nibble all day,
at work, rest and play,
For what is a life without pastry

Comments

:hopelessness: This made me laugh!
Bugger my gut,
and the size of my butt,

That's what I've been saying for years! I can so relate to your poem :)
 

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Author
Asmoab
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