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I am!

I am!

I am-- yet what I am none cares or knows;
My friends forsake me like a memory lost:
I am the self-consumer of my woes--
They rise and vanish in oblivious host;
Like shadows in love's frenzied stifled throes
And yet I am, and live- like vapours tossed

Into the nothingness of scorn and noise;
Into the living sea of waking dreams,
Where there is neither sense of life or joys,
But the vast shipwreak of my life's esteems;
Even the dearest that I loved the best
Are strange- nay, rather, stranger than the rest.

I long for scenes where man hath never trod
A place where woman never smiled or wept
There to abide with my Creator, God,
And sleep as I in childhood sweetly slept,
Untroubling and untroubled where I lie,
The glass below-- above the vaulted sky.

-John Clare


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