Yesterday was the angriest I've ever been since I've been on medication. In the end, it will be better for me. But I didn't expect such a strong withdrawal.
But nah, I'm not complaining.
I have always considered myself fortunate, being able to separate myself from momentary emotion and see a bigger picture than most people my age. Every time I feel bad, I don't get stressed because I know it's not the end of the world.
I think heart disease is more common simply because people are too wrapped up in what they're doing. 'Eyes on the prey, not on the horizon.' - Stuff like that. Me, I have no prey. I watch the sky.
It's too easy to be solely focused on what's immediately before you.
It's not an attitude, (I know I have a nasty attitude,) rather, a perspective. Some have such narrow vision, and only focus on the bad. Some can see everything, but willingly choose to ignore what is good.
Some might say I'm unmotivated, or, I don't care.
True, I'll never go to a college. I won't become a professor or doctor or lawyer. I'm terrible at math and my memory sucks. I'll get a physical job, actual work, and do that until I'm old and crippled.
I prefer a slow pace. Why stress yourself out?
I won't be the most successful person, but I won't be depressed. I won't end up jumping off a bridge. I won't whine to other people about how much my life sucks and make other people sad with a bleak outlook.
Yeah, right now I'm lonely. I'm cranky because my body wants a bunch of crap that's not good for me, and I need to find better work.
But I'll be damned if I become another workaholic killing myself with stress, or a couch potato doing an Eeyore impression.