This morning gran came into the room which woke me. I don’t remember what happened to CJ. I don’t remember if was still in bed asleep or ran out to Sandy’s room. But I got u and went to the bathroom. Then I came out with CJ watching Thomas and Friends on Netflix as gran was walking around complaining about Sandy and Todd.
Sandy and Todd had to go to the doctors this morning because he was bleeding from his hemorrhoids. Gran was complaining that Todd didn’t know how to be sick. Todd hasn’t liked doctors. Like 4 instance when CJ injured herself by falling off of something hit her chin on another thing scraping the skin off which now is a scar on her chin. He took a look @ it and said she didn’t need to go to the doctors to have it stitched up. Gran told me that while growing up, Todd’s parents Don and Jean didn’t take him, Scott or their sister to the doctors because they didn’t have insurance to pay for the doctors. So the thing was that he was told if he was dying, it had to be a good reason to go to the doctors.
Speaking of which, Don has to go into surgery to get a triple bypass on his heart. The machine that was to help his heart and that was put into place 2 years ago (maybe) and went to do a check up once which was suppose to have repeatedly but didn’t happen. So back to the complaining part, gran was also complaining about Sandy was supposed to help her find a place of her own so they wouldn’t be stressed out with her there; the computer being on standby with Netflix being reliant on internet; mom and Cory doing something; and everything else. So we watch after CJ for awhile while Sandy and Todd were away. Sandy called as I was eating a one packet of flavored oatmeal since I hadn’t eaten anything except a glass of grapefruit juice and some cherries. Sandy called about what we wanted for breakfast. Gran didn’t want anything cuz she threw up this morning before any of us were awake. So I had to tell Sandy what I wanted which was something that looked like a bear claw and a weird looking croissant filled with date jelly and covered with almonds and icing. It tasted alright. It wasn’t great per say but enough to call it breakfast.
Then I tried to stay away from Sandy who had been grouchy lately. I have no idea why. But she was. I’ve stayed away from Todd since I came to stay with them after dad kicked me out of his apartment. He had been stressed out but Sandy started to be grouchy which started about a month or two ago. Have no idea.
Sandy was telling gran about what the doctor had said about the bleeding and the hemorrhoids. Told Todd to have his butt soaking for 20 minutes. I didn’t catch what else Sandy told gran about Todd except that he had bled through his pants.
Ruth, Todd’s grandma, might’ve had a stroke which is making her switch her mind on stuff. She’s been doing that for a while now. Not sure how long. But it’s driving Jean crazy. Ruth’s husband is in a nursing home and the nursing home has been giving Ruth shit about her husband. Her husband has either Alzheimer’s or Parkinson’s. I don’t remember which. Gran won’t go to visit Ruth anymore because Ruth showed her true colors about CJ. Ruth said that we have to potty train CJ hour after hour. Todd won’t help. Since the day CJ was showing interest in being potty trained, he thought she was too young on being potty trained.
Then later on Sandy and gran saw “The Time Traveler’s Wife”, which is really sad. I didn’t see it cuz I wasn’t interested. I was playing “Awakening: Dreamless Castle” for the 3rd time because I thought it was fun to play it. Sandy asked me if I was going back over things. I said no I was just playing it the 3rd time. I like playing it, I stated.
Then later on CJ wanted to watch “I, Robot”. I have a copy of “I, Robot”. I even have copies of the “I, Robot” series from Papa. I like science fiction books. I like anything that interests me. Gran asked me if I wanted to come to the library at Chemeketa to get 3 more books that came in today and to come with her t the center nearby since she’s getting her check tomorrow. I want to get away from the apartment. The reason she was asking because Sandy and Todd are taking CJ to get her shots tomorrow and sign her up at school this fall so she can go to school. When CJ was watching “I, Robot” she came into the room and was pretending. I had a conversation with her while using my imagination with her. Sandy and Todd haven’t figured out how to do that yet for some reason. CJ, for some reason, now has an imagination friend name Maya (or Mia). She came into the room and was talking. I asked her who she was talking to. “My mama,” she said. “But your mom is in yonder. Not there, CJ,”I said to her. “That’s CJ’s mom,” CJ said.
“Oh yeah. Then who are you if you’re not CJ?” I asked. “I’m Maya (or Mia).” “If you’re Maya (Mia), where’s CJ?” “I’m human,” she stated. “You’re a mama, too,” she also said to me. “I’m not a mom. I don’t have any children of my own,” I said.
Later this evening, Sandy and I were watching Queen: Making of Night of the Opera. I love listening to Queen. As many people growing up hearing of the great and fantastic artists, my mom exposed me to them too. My friends Tom and Kevin listened to them too. I knew because Tom was showing off music clips on FB and Kevin sometimes responds to his wall on Facebook. I posted a status saying “Do you know how hard not to laugh at your grandmother if she ran into the screen door to the back porch and literally taking it off the frame? Well not off the frame but the thing that the screen door was on.” Tom liked it. I thought it was funny when gran ran into the screen door thinking it was open. I was there at the table nearby the front door snickering as gran was holding a bottle of water @ the back porch water the plants we have growing for CJ. We’re showing her how to get a green thumb and how plants grow. CJ likes pink that one day gran got her pink flowers. CJ kept thanking gran for the pink flowers. CJ was certainly happy that day.
With CJ away at school this fall, I can have the room to myself. Well, I don’t know when meaning what days she’ll be attending school. I only know that she’s going in the afternoon. I also don’t know that I’ll be in Job Corps. This fall either. Gran and Sandy keep asking me if Job Corps has called me yet which is annoying. I want them to stop, to leave me alone. I want to be away from family but be around with someone who I can talk to, hug with, have a leaning shoulder on times I’m having a bad day and so on. It might be awhile before I find that someone. I don’t want just someone who’s an idiot but knows me for who I am. Someone who accepts me for me. Someone who isn’t afraid that I see people from the other side and that I know when someone is lying. Someone who loves me for who I am. I don’t need someone to pity me like Cory is. Him being my stepdad doesn’t mean I need him around. I don’t need a father right now. It’s too late for me or for someone acting like a father to me. I don’t need it. I just need a friend, a companion who can be there for me. Later on I might be using runes in here so no one can read it or use various symbols from various languages so no one else read my journal. My journal is private and no one needs to read. Maybe I could use Latin in here. My aunt and uncle may not know how to read it but its good practice to me.