Down the High Street, and out of town, to my local Aldi store:
A gentle stroll, out in the fresh air, sunshine and blue sky IS a plus of course, but just BEING, walking and sucking up that good clean air. It clears the mind and gives way so many random thoughts and perceptions and today was no exception. So often nowadays, I find myself thinking about posture, MY posture, when I'm out walking. Well, today, I found myself thinking , an image so vivid in my mind's eye, about a soldier I used to see sometimes and how ridiculous he looked as he walked, or rather marched, as they do, with the peak his hat resting on his nose. He had to tilt his head back just to see where he was going and so as a consequence, maybe not, he walked bolt upright with shoulders back. Exuding, I thought, an almost arrogant confidence and, as I strolled, I thought about that.
In time, I would think, it would train a person to walk that way even without wearing a hat and maybe that's the point, THE whole point. We can't have an army of soldiers that skulk around with their chins in their chests. I suddenly thought about how all I'VE ever done, is skulked. There's no two ways about it, I skulk, what sort of an impression must that send out? We are what we I suppose.
Anyway, going back to the soldier and his, or her, appearance. To some observers the might well be a view that forward looking, as the chap with the peak of his hat resting on his nose would seem to be doing, equals forward thinking, and thus, not only is he perceived in a different light, he is probably treated differently. Confidence is power? Now there's a thought. I'm not sure that I'd like to be seen as powerful, I shall stick to skulking I think.
Walking on, a young woman caught my eye. Not too tall, not short, medium height I suppose. Slim but not angular. The edges seemed soft enough. Fawn suede knee-length boots, faded skinny jeans, ash-blonde shoulder length hair, topped off with a chunky white pullover. Think Scandinavian beauty. Early twenties maybe. Again, I found myself thinking. I really shouldn't do that. I think too much. I think. If I'D been in my twenties, right there and then, here and now, feeling as horny as hell, as any normal twenty something might, I wouldn't have given her so much as a second glance. No way. No how. In any sort of social setting, not that I ever socialised, much, I would have avoided her like the plague, might EVEN, probably WOULD have, got my coat and left because of her.
So what has this to do with appearance? I this instance, MY appearance, or what I imagine my appearance to be?
And my answer is, that it goes back to the soldier image. It's " appearance " isn't it. Like that soldier. In control, to the point almost of command. I can't say that I envy that guy, nor would I want to be seen in that light. I actually, even now in my old age, steer well clear of that kind of person. I really don't like, or trust, people who "like" themselves.
As I waited and watched my shopping being scanned by the checkout chap, he was having a problem with my Bartlet's, the scanner couldn't/wouldn't register them.
' A free one '? I ventured, tongue in cheek.
' NO !' Barked the checkout guy.
Jesus! I was joking for Chris' sakes. I was joking.