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  1. The fractured fairy-tales of a Mad Poet

    Once Upon a Butterfly

    I flitter and flutter all day long while I sing the song of life. The few
    precious days that I have to enjoy the wind beneath my wings,
    gives me no time to wallow in that chaotic foolishness that brings on
    all that stress and strife. I wander the skies and partake of the nectar
    that nature provides. The life of a butterfly is a joyous affair...

    I find ...
  2. Faith.

    Don't expect anything emotional here.

    I enjoy how people assume that faith is blind. Illogical.

    For the most part I have avoided directly stating what I believe here, but I see no harm in sharing it. I thought I'd do so in blog form.

    Please do not assume I'm trying to convince anyone of anything. I'm only stating my own reasons for believing what I do, and if you're interested in seeing my viewpoint, then by all means keep reading.

    I will say ...
  3. Tales from the drunk.

    As I sit here and wait patiently for the blunt to come back around to me, I take a sip of my hard Arnold Palmer, a concoction of iced tea, lemonade, and Bombay Sapphire spiced gin.

    I ate well this morning, so I should be good to drink all day.

    I'm about halfway to the threshold right now. Feelin' grooveh.

    And of course, I have a blunt waiting to be rolled right now. The parteh is NEVAR over.

    That's not what this post is about. Well it is, ...
  4. You may be right, I may be crazy

    It's Tuesday. So I took my troubles to class (the project is mandatory but attendance is optional). After loading all my goodies onto the classroom PC, I showed the instructor the errors and he suggested I simplify my expression. So I separated the parts of what I was doing (or trying to do) in one line into two lines. And both parts worked. So I kept it that way.

    In other news, my husband broke my recipe database in an unrecoverable fashion yesterday. Who am I kidding? He broke ...
  5. Six-car pass day

    It was a six-car pass morning. Early enough, but dammit, the pokies were still out there. I took three in one swoop, high in the canyon. To be fair, two were not pokies, just stuck behind the other, but I took them all coming out of the first turn just past the Corral.

    The Corral, the nightclub (an empty lot, now), the place where the biggies used to play back in Topanga’s hippie heyday; Springsteen, the Doors, the Dead—my neighbor used to go there. “It was a great time, man. A little ...
  6. I don't care what you say anymore, this is my life ...

    So today I worked on my project. I discovered that I don't know enough about the STL to use vectors effectively and so my programming is on hold till Tuesday ... class is optional, but it's where you go when you're stuck. Of course, this took multiple hours -- realizations take a fraction of a second, but the buildup is always long and laborious. And if you don't know what I'm talking about you are so not alone.

    So, not working on the programming project, I started my song charting. ...
  7. Young people this time. {Long}

    How many days has it been since I've had a real conversation? With someone outside of work that is. Sure, you can talk to someone while you both work, but eh. It's different. Online is different. I live with people who only speak to me out of necessity. I don't blame them.

    I need to stop staying up late. Too much time to think without doing anything. What do I even think about, anymore? I distract myself when I'm at work, fantasies of what I'll do... but don't carry out anything I ...
  8. Life - My one year WF anniversary

    I'm cutting it close, but it's still January 30th for me and it marks one year of me being a part of this wonderful place. It's trippy thinking back on where I was last year and how quickly time went. This day seemed so far away. I didn't even realize it was approaching until yesterday and I thought "Holy crap, it's been a year"

    I will say I know that in the last year you guys have helped shape me into who I am in this moment. The advice, the creative freedom, the special ...
  9. [Ramblings] One of These Days...

    Unfortunately, not today.

    My first day off in three weeks, feels kind of strange, really. One of the great things about having two jobs is that I have plenty of money. One of the worst things about having plenty of money is that there's always stuff to spend it on. This past week, I finally got the Buick fixed (I think I mentioned this already, but I'm too lazy to go back and check, so...). It needed an ignition switch and a new battery. Then it needed new wiper blades, and now ...
  10. Learning.

    So I'm figuring out how to use this wacom tablet. I'm also listening to writing-based lectures. And I'm wondering what second language I want to learn.

    I forgot how annoying learning was.

    I have distant memories from my early, EARLY childhood. Just a few.Learning was fun. Learning to speak properly and express yourself, then learning bigger words.

    Math was fascinating... at first.

    Just learning everything about the world.

    Now? It's ...
  11. The White Van Library [Objectionable Content Warning]

    Hey guys!

    In celebration of my third week here (tomorrow) at WF, here's a place to sit back and enjoy the pros and cons of intentional or unintentional publications. Ready for a totally pointless procrastination thread that still relates to literature, publications, and literary discoveries? The White Van Library is at your service!

    When I became a Volunteer Conversation Partner at the University of Connecticut's American English Language Institute (U.C.A.E.L.I), innuendos

    Updated January 27th, 2016 at 02:13 AM by PrinzeCharming

  12. Zen and The Art of ARRRRRRRRGH!!!

    My bike has 15,000 miles on it. Only 15K. And the headlamp goes out. I'm wondering if Honda contracted with Takata on more than air bags. Well, anyway unlike a car (where you have two), a burned out headlamp on a motorcycle is kinda a big deal.

    Two options, well three. Take it to the dealership? WHAT? May as well turn in my Man Card right now.

    So, I can disassemble the fairing for direct access. The problem is, you need a manual to know where all the booby trap ...
  13. Depression V

    Some recent posts have brought up a question as
    how others view your situation. Just the statement
    "I'm depressed today" does not mean you have clinical depression. Maybe you are just whining, or sad. Even people close to you may not realize your real situation.

    I had clinical depression. I tried to hurt myself. I spent time in a mental ward, group therapy. Before you criticize others, find help. A counselor, a doctor. Not all people can recognize the clues, ...
  14. [Ramblings] Work and Other Things

    Haha, just kidding. I don't have time for other things. Publix has seen fit to work me forty hours a week, sometimes more (46 hours this week, which equals overtime pay), and I've still got my route with Coca-Cola, so I haven't had the most free time lately. It's been a bit of a drag on my relationships, but I was able to get the Buick fixed and get a new battery in it. Turns out the damned thing needed a new ignition switch, and now it needs new tires... hooray. Just a list a mile long of ...
  15. There Is A Demon Downstairs He Says His Name Is Mike

    Quote Originally Posted by BeanMcGrath View Post
    After discussion
    and observation
    we have concluded

    his true
    is Mephistopheles.

    We had our suspicions when
    we spied him chain-smoking
    in the garden at night.

    He would invite
    his friends over
    attorneys and art critics

    obvious claimants
    to the vast landscape
    of Hades.

    Our fears
    were confirmed
    when the pit arrived

    hottest day
    on recent
  16. This damned cold.

    It's exactly a week now since this crap started. Last Sunday morning after a good night's sleep was ended abruptly by an impatient bladder that would not wait any longer. Then having made that short walk to the loo decided that i felt bloody awful and the only sensible place for me to be would be in bed. And so it was, ( how many times has that phrase been used? Corny dither... oh well. ) i crawled back into the pit ( dither speak for bed ) , at around nine a.m. I slept all day and re-awoke at four ...
    Tags: dithering
  17. Depression IV

    Many experts say that depression is a disease,
    it's not your fault. Well, in some cases I'm
    convinced you can worry yourself into depression
    through self-doubt, poor self-image, and an attitude that if it's not my fault it must be someone else's.

    Regardless, self-doubt is one of the most destructive
    human failures. I know, because it happened to me.

    Medication can help, but not always. If it does, good.
    If not, consider other options like ...
  18. Frustration and Apathy

    In the 1980's (before many of you were born) there was a big scandal regarding the United States dealing weapons to Iran to free hostages. This week, we free-up 1.5 billion in Iranian assets, and five hostages are freed? I suppose if we give them the money to buy / make their own weapons, it's OK. And we must have stipulated that the paying of ransom is now an appropriate and just US policy. Unless, it was simple blackmail: Give us our money or we build nukes.
    A respected general ...
  19. Thoughts of Today, Tomorrow's Parasite

    My body shakes and twitches. I chugged a glass of water like a nomad under the hot blazing sun of the Sahara. The snow has recently fallen overnight like confetti on a parade. There was nothing to celebrate last night. The deflated floats were useless. The lightly fallen snow adds a nice touch to the lawn. The sun is already beating the precious flakes down into the depths of the soil. That sounds awfully familiar. The unique presence is a temporary gloss for a Monday. Why would anyone sugarcoat ...

    As much as I hate my life, I persist and continue to struggle towards whatever end lies before me.

    Every year my patience wears a little more. I take into consideration the accomplishments that I acheive, then compare them to the issues that arose, only to find I've fallen behind, or short, in some fashion.

    Life doesn't allow you the freedom to blame someone else for your problems. There are no easy fixes and there's certainly no divinity to solve anything.
  21. No Free Lunch

    Cheap gas is not a good thing. I know, all the news outlets are telling you to rejoice that oil is below $30 a barrel. You'll save hundreds of dollars a year. Etc...
    The real deal is we're looking down the barrel of a global recession. Oil is cheap because oil futures are cheap. Because, production of manufactured goods is going down. China is the catalyst. The opportunistic disease in the weak patient.
    I don't enjoy being the bearer of bad news. Historical econ cycles predict ...
  22. Update: LRWG #9

    I managed to get a few more words written on this assignment. It's up to 695 which leaves only 2,305 to go. This might have something to do with the door slamming neighbors having moved out. Add in that the cold weather has kept the kids indoors. So, it's been fairly peaceful around me.

    What I don't understand is why this story is taking so long to write. Even with the chaos that's been around me, it's been over a year since I finished lesson 8. The most frustrating part with the story ...
  23. So, uh, science.

    There's a reason I don't have face-to-face conversations about it with people.

    Something based almost entirely on theory, and yet obsessed over the smallest bit of physical evidence.

    What gets me is that many speak of the big bang as it if it were fact.

    If the observable universe is so big, isn't there good reason to assume it is also much, much larger than the piece of it that we can observe?

    My point being, if the part which we can observe ...
  24. I don't care...

    I don’t care, I don’t care…

    They have all these headlines about this celebrity, that one—I don’t care.
    She’s watching some B’s/ Witches of Beverly Hills spin-off and all I can think is who are these people, and why does anyone care?! I watch for less than five minutes and then am reminded that I would never have any of these people in my real life— no thank you. I go on the computer, or I leave the room; same difference.
  25. Life - Things that make me happy

    I debated about whether or not this would be another post about my struggle and complaining about how hard it is, and how I can't seem to snap out of this depressive hole I've fallen into. So in an effort to keep myself afloat, I'm going to list some things that have made me happy recently, and although some might be completely ridiculous they help me.

    Personal Happiness - And I don't necessarily mean personal happiness. It's a brand of Japanese trinket. They are these little bunnies ...
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