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  1. RhythmOvPain's Avatar
    I finally have lyrics for this.

    SONIC BOOM

    [Intro]
    [Guitar solo]

    [Verse]
    Threats attack from every side
    In the open sky there's nowhere to hide
    When my missiles lock on kiss your ass goodbye
    I'm king of these skies motherfucker; prepare to die

    [Bridge]

    Fighter on my six
    Afterburners kick
    Can't fucking lose him

    My wingman's toast
    Activating smoke
    Bank left; kill jets

    [Verse]
    The bogey flies past and I laugh in glee
    As my missile locks on and I set it free
    Plumet to the earth while my engines reheat
    Back on the prowl; I'm too deep to go back now

    [Bridge]
    I fly directly into the mouth of hell
    I kill the enemies I find at will
    Alone, I've killed a thousand men
    Now there's nobody left
    Who can stop me

    [Bridge]
    Penetrate the hole
    In their short range radar grid
    Avoid the anti-aircraft guns
    Then with my final breath
    PAINT THE TARGETS
    FIRE THE GUNS
    DROP THE PAYLOAD
    LEVEL THEIR HOMES
    FOLLOW THE HIGHWAY
    TO THE DEMILITARIZED ZONE
    LOCATE THE BEHEMOTH
    NOW I'M ON MY OWN

    FUCK!

    [SOLO]

    [Bridge]
    ALL OUTTA BULLETS
    MISSILES ALL GONE
    NO BOMBS LEFT
    JUST A PRAYER AND THIS SONG
    JAMMING THE THROTTLE
    I FALL TO THE GROUND
    THE BEHOMOTH BEFORE ME
    AT THE SPEED OF SOUND

    I will die.

    WITH YOU!

    [Solo]

    [End]
  2. RhythmOvPain's Avatar
    This song is now complete, but a final demo will take a while due to the bass player not knowing the complete composition yet.

    It's roughly 7:40 seconds long when I play it alone, but with the bass it should be longer. I'm unbelievably satisfied with all my hard work over the past two months.

    I've completed 4 songs in one month and the next month, a masterpiece that's almost 8 minutes long.

    I love this song, and I can't wait until It's fully complete.
  3. Biro's Avatar
    Strange one Pip.
  4. PiP's Avatar
    Interesting this blog post should surface today. Nope, she hasn't changed. She says she is terrified of COVID because she has COPD, but she went out and got so drunk with some friends yesterday, despite the fact she had invited us round her house for a socially distanced drink, she could barely string a cohesive sentence together and she kept wanting to touch me.

    Now more, than ever, we need to choose our friends carefully.
    Updated July 5th, 2020 at 12:11 PM by PiP
  5. Jp's Avatar
    Oh my, and now we find ourselves in 2020. I hope she at least took this more seriously.
  6. RhythmOvPain's Avatar
    The song is over 7 minutes long now, but I've been working with a bass player which has slowed progress a bit due to the new arrangement. The final guitar solo is like 25% complete but I will be working on it constantly until I finish it.

    I don't mind the extra time it's taking because this song is really just amazingly good, and I will try to record the whole song up to the final solo today.
  7. PiP's Avatar
    This is wonderful news! Well done you.

    I wonder if it's possible to get this custom stitched onto a pillowcase so I can hug it?
    Yep, anything is possible I bet few members on WF sew.
    Updated June 27th, 2020 at 09:49 PM by vranger
  8. vranger's Avatar
    To follow up, it only got better. From tonight at 11:30:

    Hi Jim,

    I finished your book. It’s very good. I really enjoyed reading it. Thank you for the opportunity to read it. You must publish it. Don’t get sidetracked, it’s too good not to publish. I’ll be in touch.

    *******************************
    I wonder if it's possible to get this custom stitched onto a pillowcase so I can hug it?
    Updated June 27th, 2020 at 09:49 PM by vranger
  9. RhythmOvPain's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by BornForBurning
    I wasn't going to comment again; but I actually liked this quite a bit. Reminded me of In the Sign of Evil...I think that's about the highest compliment I can give it. Now if only you had some really awful 80s-German production, pounding jungle-drums, bass thick as blood, and would bother to miss your notes every now and then, this would be literally perfect.


    This is a lie from the Devil though
    and you misspelled righteous
    I really appreciate you listening and giving me these critiques. Thank you for your consideration.
  10. RhythmOvPain's Avatar
    There will be a long guitar solo after this and the song will eventually end.

    I'll be done before the end of next week.

    This is basically day 11 since I began with the first introduction riff.

    I'm so proud of how it's grown. <3
    Updated June 25th, 2020 at 01:11 AM by RhythmOvPain
  11. vranger's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by PiP
    Fingers crossed!
    Later this evening I got an email from him telling me he's going to read it directly after the book he's currently reading, and asked if I'd mind if he passed it along to other members of the board of directors of the organization which carries on several programs begun by the author.

    I told him, "If you like the book, I'd be delighted for you to share it." So that's still the crux. Did I write a book the author's fans will enjoy and accept. If he likes it, my chances of getting the Agency to accept it go WAY up ... if I can get members of the board to give me letters of introduction to the agent.
  12. Gumby's Avatar
    Good luck!
  13. PiP's Avatar
    Fingers crossed!
  14. BornForBurning's Avatar
    I wasn't going to comment again; but I actually liked this quite a bit. Reminded me of In the Sign of Evil...I think that's about the highest compliment I can give it. Now if only you had some really awful 80s-German production, pounding jungle-drums, bass thick as blood, and would bother to miss your notes every now and then, this would be literally perfect.

    Death befalls the righeous soul; only hell awaits you
    God's forsaken his control; your life is lost forever
    This is a lie from the Devil though
    and you misspelled righteous
  15. BornForBurning's Avatar
    Okay, I will try my hand at critiquing this. A couple notes. 1) I know nothing about music. My compositional knowledge is limited to trying to riff off of Bathory and Deicide. 2) Metal is difficult to critique on a pure lead level because a huge part of the metal sound comes from drums and bass. Without drums and bass, leads sound weird and naked, no matter how great they are.

    Okay.

    So clearly on a technical level you are a highly skilled guitarist. I wish I could tremolo pick my solos like that! Compositionally, eh...pretty stereotypical thrash. Reminded me of this Swiss outfit, partly due to the guitar tone, I think. I liked when around 2:15 it went into a sad minor as opposed to an angry minor. That was interesting, didn't expect that. Speed is good, but speed for its own sake is kind of meh in my opinion. Anyone can play fast, but few guys can turn pure speed into compositional genius like Jon Nodveidt or Quorthon or Nicke Andersson can/could.

    The lyrics are interesting. Cliche, but I don't count that against you. It's metal! So much time has been wasted in this genre trying to 'innovate' and fix what ain't broke. I do disagree on a moral level with the nihilism and cursing, though. And I think melody one and two are pretty weak. Feels onanistic and self-righteous, not threatening or dark.

    Overall, I would enjoy moshing to this at a festival. I don't think I would listen to it on my own time.
  16. TL Murphy's Avatar
    I'm not a musician but a poet. So I don't spend time on the song-writer's board. But I see that you posted some poems in NaPoWriMo, which is not a place where you will get in-depth critique. But if you bring some of those poems over to the Poetry and Lyrics board you will likely get more attention. No promises. I personally don't feel qualified to comment on song lyrics and I don't particularly like rhyming couplets so I usually don't have much to say about that kind of poetry. And I would probably avoid commenting on poetry that uses excessive profanity. Although I use plenty of profanity myself, I just see it as something that is most effective used judiciously. Gratuitous profanity indicates an aggressive personality behind the words who already feels persecuted and is likely to be threatened by honest critique, and no one wants that. But others will likely weigh in. I also read somewhere that people who use a lot of profanity tend to be more honest than people who don't - so , there you go. Keep in mind that for every poem you post in a poetry workshop you are expected to make at least two critiques.
  17. vranger's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by PiP
    Sounds like you are making real progress with your novel, v.

    btw would love you to publish your comparison between
    scrivener and ywriter to the forum for discussion. So many members ask questions about it.
    Will do.
  18. PiP's Avatar
    Sounds like you are making real progress with your novel, v.

    btw would love you to publish your comparison between
    shrivener and ywriter to the forum for discussion. So many members ask questions about it.
  19. vranger's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by PiP
    It is suprising how one task leads to another I used to think LG was made by Samsung ... just googled and apparently not. Both Korean companies but separate..apparently.What do you think of Scrivener?
    I'm still not there yet. I need to finish the tutorial and catch up to what I did in yWriter. Once I do, I'll type up my thoughts in comparison in an upcoming blog.

    One thing does concern me: my son told me that Scrivener was originally developed for Mac, and not all the features are there yet for the PC version. I have no more detail than that, though. I could break out a Mac, but with all my other work on PC, I'm not sure that would really be a good solution.
  20. PiP's Avatar
    It is suprising how one task leads to another I used to think LG was made by Samsung ... just googled and apparently not. Both Korean companies but separate..apparently.What do you think of Scrivener?
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