View Full Version : Just Right!

November 5th, 2019, 03:41 AM
It don’t matter none wat people say. You can do it!

I no what youre thinking “people can b such d-bags, how can I write good and not be made two look lick like a idiot”? Don’t woory about them. Hears why:

First like, youll get better. As you do, you mite be like that guy in the book about the mouse that gets smart called flowers for agememnon. As you dew, people mite start treating you diffent. They hated on Charlee, thyll hate on you two.

We live in a class based socetee, where if your not schooled write or got a good job, people look down on ewe. You shouldn’t judge, but its okay to aknowledge the oblivious. Most of these folks hatin on you couldn’t get lug nutz off a tire cuz they cant remember “wrighty tighty, lefty lucy”. That and they got the grip of a five yer old girl.

Nope. A lot of these ‘xperts are white collar dweebs that Peter Principaled themselfs up to the point of incontinence. And they don’t lik you, cause they don’t lick themselves. Oh shure, they act nice mostly, but their words end up driping with condensation. You can thank youre lucky stars youre not that ducked up.
But this isn’t abot them. Its about you.

You sea, you can learn stuff from everyone, even sad jerks that troll your werk. Youll soon learn that your tough and resilient. You don’t knead the approval of pointy-headed dweebs, but you stil listen to them. Hec, studyin a turd will tell yous how much fibr your eating. Learn from thos turds.

Keep learning, and improving. Shure, you’ll still make a misake every now and then. Listen to legitimate criticizim. Just ignore the biased “help” of those that lift themselves by stepping on others. Write about what you knoe and love. Write with passion. Let your reel voice shine through, and don’t moderate it because some snowflakes get irritated easy.

I’m not saying you’ll ever be good. But it’s far better to be an imperfect you than a polished turd, like some. Anyone can learn to right well. Not everyone can live well. Focus on that first. The rest will follow.

“True glory consists in doing what deserves to be written, in writing what deserves to be read; and in so living as to make the world happier for our living in it.” Pliny the Elder, circa 70 A.D.

Pliny survived power-mad tyrants like Nero, and paranoid degenerates like Caligula. If he could write under those conditions, and thrive, surely you can manage your annoying little heel biters. You are not a mouse.

Are you published? Are you making money, gaining prestige and notoriety?
No? Good.

Just write. Never let anyone take that from you.
“Fortune favors the brave.”
Be a good you. Then, be a good writer.

And remember to stop and smell the flowers.

November 9th, 2019, 11:04 PM
I love the way this is funny on so many levels. The voice is amusing in itself, the homespun philosophy is brutally sharp but, at the same time, feels like absolutely sound advice and the malopropisms that are sprinkled through the piece are a joy - I especially liked 'driping with condensation' instead of 'dripping with condescension'. The fact that the writing improves as it goes on proves the message of the entire work and rounds off a perfect piece of observational humour.

I enjoyed reading this a lot and salute you, Winston. You are a master of this craft. :)

Olly Buckle
November 10th, 2019, 12:21 AM
Not quite for me, it seems too long winded. The style seems to call for a punchier approach, it makes me think of things like standup comedy. To show you the sort of thing I mean:-

"We live in a class based socetee, where if your not schooled write or got a good job, people look down on ewe."
Socetee's class based (you really don't need to be specific, they won't think you mean any other one). The next bit does lend some character to the statement 'If you're ignorant or poor you're despised.' but I can't help feeling you have overdone it, job and schooling are pretty known territory, but the 'unnecessary' 'where' at the start of 'Where if you're not...' sounds in character. Of course It is entirely up to you, maybe I am reading him wrong, but I would say he starts off ignorant, but he isn't stupid.