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Bradberrykait
March 22nd, 2018, 09:44 PM
I have to admit, I'm a sucker for a gentleman with a bad-boy side. So I'm writing a mafia based romance novel and I'm trying to think of a way for his love interest to get tangled up in his world of crime. I want to avoid the cliches that I've read from other amateur writers such as (1) she over hears a discussion or witnesses a crime that she shouldn't so the MC kidnaps her to keep her quiet because he doesn't have the heart to kill her (2) she's sold to him as a servant if you will as repayment for a debt that her family owes. Things along those lines. The second one wouldn't fit my character because although he leads a mafia, he does hold specific morals and as I mentioned, he has a gentlemanly side. I've had a few ideas but I'm struggling to execute them. Any ideas or tips would be helpful.

Underd0g
March 22nd, 2018, 10:32 PM
I like the idea of incrementalism. A gradual introduction into the life that she doesn't see coming. Seems like it would be a fun challenge to come up with the set of circumstances that would make it impossible for her to turn around. You could keep her sympathetic or give her a dark side.

Olly Buckle
March 23rd, 2018, 12:02 AM
I wrote a short adapted from a Greek myth about a woman from the old country who marries a mafioso but finds he is cheating her. She recruits his number two and they kill him together , he taking over the wife and the boss job. Something like that would put her in from the start.

Bradberrykait
March 23rd, 2018, 12:44 AM
Something along those lines would make it easier than trying to transition her into the story. Thank you for the idea!

Bradberrykait
March 23rd, 2018, 12:48 AM
@Underd0g thank you! I appreciate the nice feedback on the general idea of the story. I love the idea of having her gradually give in to a darker side of herself. As of now she's innocent, kind-hearted and sheltered. So exposing her to his lifestyle is definitely going to be fun, but giving her a dark side definitely spices things up for the readers. I feel like that could pose great conflict between her and the MC. He loves her for her innocence and because she's everything he's not, but when she starts transforming he starts to feel unsure about his feelings towards her. I LOVE it, thank you! Now to just find a way for them to meet without it becoming too much of a cliche.

Olly Buckle
March 23rd, 2018, 10:28 AM
Sometimes it really does not matter that some side issue like that is cliche. I notice it in fiction all the time now I am attuned, but I am pretty sure the average reader simply glides over them.

Char_M
March 24th, 2018, 01:20 AM
I have to admit, I'm a sucker for a gentleman with a bad-boy side. So I'm writing a mafia based romance novel and I'm trying to think of a way for his love interest to get tangled up in his world of crime. I want to avoid the cliches that I've read from other amateur writers such as (1) she over hears a discussion or witnesses a crime that she shouldn't so the MC kidnaps her to keep her quiet because he doesn't have the heart to kill her (2) she's sold to him as a servant if you will as repayment for a debt that her family owes. Things along those lines. The second one wouldn't fit my character because although he leads a mafia, he does hold specific morals and as I mentioned, he has a gentlemanly side. I've had a few ideas but I'm struggling to execute them. Any ideas or tips would be helpful.What if they met under normal circumstances and he falls for her? And she gets slowly introduced that way after she falls for him? Or what if she gets mugged by a different person and he comes to the rescue? Maybe she's a mole from a rival mafia gang? That could be a serous plot twist. It's hard to know how to introduce her with no information about her. Can you give us any more to go on?

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Underd0g
March 24th, 2018, 11:57 AM
@Underd0g thank you! I appreciate the nice feedback on the general idea of the story. I love the idea of having her gradually give in to a darker side of herself. As of now she's innocent, kind-hearted and sheltered. So exposing her to his lifestyle is definitely going to be fun, but giving her a dark side definitely spices things up for the readers. I feel like that could pose great conflict between her and the MC. He loves her for her innocence and because she's everything he's not, but when she starts transforming he starts to feel unsure about his feelings towards her. I LOVE it, thank you! Now to just find a way for them to meet without it becoming too much of a cliche.

What if they were to meet because she watched him do something uncharacteristic of his criminal past. A kindness or something sacrificial. In this vein, the cliché would be if he stood up to bullies. Not that! Some creative kindness that only she notices.

Underd0g
March 24th, 2018, 01:47 PM
Have you ever seen 'The Iceman" (2012) with Michael Shannon?

FireofDarkness
May 18th, 2018, 02:43 PM
I have to admit, I'm a sucker for a gentleman with a bad-boy side. So I'm writing a mafia based romance novel and I'm trying to think of a way for his love interest to get tangled up in his world of crime. I want to avoid the cliches that I've read from other amateur writers such as (1) she over hears a discussion or witnesses a crime that she shouldn't so the MC kidnaps her to keep her quiet because he doesn't have the heart to kill her (2) she's sold to him as a servant if you will as repayment for a debt that her family owes. Things along those lines. The second one wouldn't fit my character because although he leads a mafia, he does hold specific morals and as I mentioned, he has a gentlemanly side. I've had a few ideas but I'm struggling to execute them. Any ideas or tips would be helpful.

I don't typically recommend movies, but for this one I would recommend watching 'GoodFellas.' Its a long, slow movie, but it sounds like it would be very helpful for you. It's from 1990 so you might try to find it from your library.

moderan
May 18th, 2018, 06:49 PM
Jim Thompson and James M Cain are probably better things to look at than Goodfellas as those two writers dwell on such subjects. Not going to find much romance in noir, but plenty of ideas on how to fit into a life of crime and rampant doublecrossing.

Ralph Rotten
May 19th, 2018, 11:10 PM
"because although he leads a mafia, he does hold specific morals and as I mentioned, he has a gentlemanly side. I've had a few ideas but I'm struggling to execute them. Any ideas or tips would be helpful."

If he is running a crime family then he is likely a sociopath pretending to be a nice guy, like Stalin posturing. To run an underworld organization you need to be abby-normal. If it were something normal people could do then we'd all be doing it. Many gangsters have tried to pretend they were gentlemen, but it was all a thin veil covering a monster beneath. People who run crime families are not nice people. They may give away turkeys like Nino Brown, but underneath it all they are sharks, and you cannot tame a shark.