View Full Version : Junkyard dogs

July 13th, 2016, 12:13 AM
Hot summer afternoons are like junior-high kids' freedom; we never know what will happen next, but it's always a fantastic event. Right now, we're playing kick ball and it's a tied game. The losers gets to treat.
If I can help us win, my populairty level will be sky-rocketing through the roof- granting me an easy access to all the local hot chicks.

"Hey alex, just make sure you hit the freaking ball." Frank said. He's not only my greatest teammate but, he's also been my best friend since like the second grade. And today he's been carrying the whole entire team on his back, and now it's time for me to step up to the plate.
I have to make this count, a good kick from me will give us an assured victory. "Hey, don't worry about me. I can take care of it." I carelessly replied back. "I hate when you say that." Frank said.

My star moment is here, I can see it coming. I can't wait to be going home- to a line of pinned up babes ready to blow me a kiss.
I'm prowling after it like a wild lion. I only have one mountain to climb, there's one obstacle that is still standing in my way- I have only one enemy left to destroy. Her name is Karren copper.

I thank God for whom ever invented tank tops because, she's carrying a giant pair of watermelons on her chest, and I've been in love with them for quite sometime.
Every word she speaks melts me like a popsicle stranded in heat; while slowy dripping away into the crevices.

"So are you ready, hot shot?" She asked. When it comes to Karren, my entire middle school has yet to find a better pitcher. Now I'm starting to get nervous, I'm blowing haze like a wild fire; there's a dynamite trapped inside of my guts!
She hangs the ball in the front of her face, while meditating for action. She pitches it and it comes at me fast- like a speeding bullet.

It's velocity doesn't lack inhibitions, it's probably capable of breaking the sound barrier. It looks as if- it's being engulfed by a cloud of shrouding flames eating away at its mesh.
For a second time seemed to have stopped- like its frozen. The ball's in mid air, the people and things around me aren't moving. And Frank's yelling in slow motion, "Hit...the...ball."

I pulled my leg back, and I cocked it like a pistol. I kicked the ball, from the moment it hits- it gives off the sound of a wrecking ball when it pummels a building. It takes off, we're watching it fly like a drooling dog after a bone.

I'm standing in awe, mouth agaped- dreaming about my fans- cheering me on. "Alex! Alex! Alex!" What a moment it will be! All the girls will be at my feet until I'm drowned from the brim filled with adoring fans.

But, now- I can't believe my eyes; the ball is still flying, it ends up in a junk yard. We can't believe what we've just witnessed- I switch from glee to a silent somber.
My moment has passed- the curtains drop; my heart- pierced by a trident.
"Aw man, way to go Alex." Frank said. Even my own friends won't look at me, I'm finished.

How can I ever reclaim what is rightfully mines, a place near the stars? To make things worst, the ball I just lost is the last memory I have left of my brother- who passed away last year. So therefore, I have to get it back and gain my salvation.
My only worry are the three pitbulls keeping watch. They are the product of a land owner who one day decides to keep a safe lock on his most prized possession.

But, If I don't do something- then my highschool days will be hell on earth. I'll always be tormented by my peers for losing, and I will never forgive myslef, if I let go of the last piece of memory from my dead brother. So I have to go tonight- when the dogs are trapped inside of a deep sleep.

July 13th, 2016, 12:23 AM
Nice job Ricky. I liked your story. A few technical mistakes but the story itself was interesting and I'd like to find out what happens next.

July 14th, 2016, 02:35 AM
Part Deux

It's dawn, I'm watching the setting sun- lower itself down from a string tied to the heavens; into the edge of our mystical horizon- which is connected to my favorite beach.
I can almost see it dipping itself inside the surface of the deep- causing a ripple, spreading chaos on top of the ocean.

This is almost like a reflection of my soul; Im used to chaos. At the cusp of my humanity- I'm hanging on by a thread. Sanity is fighting for it's survival on the brink of extinction.
I can feel a razor sharp teeth gnawing, sinking themselves deeper into my heart.

So I'm delighted because, for a brief moment I have a twin. I'm home, sitting in my front porch- my view is amazing. I get to stare right into the forest over-looking the town at the bottom.

Although I'm not sure what, but I can see something moving up ahead behind the trees. Going through the thicket of branches.
I can hear footsteps rustling, splitting weak branches; a person's frame is coming into view- oh! There's only one person that I know of that owns a Carolina panthers jersey.

It's Frank. I've always wondered why he adored football so much, but now when I think about it- it makes a whole lot of sense.
Frank is the size of a mountain. I feel bad for anyone that gets hit- he's a freight train! It definitely explains why he enjoys competing so much, it's a game that is played by elite titans.

Tonight im facing a lot of danger, I mean- I can literally be torn into bits. Frank and I have been best friends for some time, and in that time- we've learned to understand and know each other's pain.
So right now I'm not surprised by his unspoken brokeness. I can see with an eye of understanding- at the black clouds that are hanging above his head.

I'm going to try and cheer him up, "Heyyy what you got there, bucko?" I asked. He looks up happily, as if he completely forgot about what will happen tonight.
As if it was all just a bad dream and we're back on the court- playing kick ball again. "It's a pack of cigarettes. I took them from my dad." This is what we do when we get nervous; we drink stolen liquor from our parents and we smoke.

I take a couple of drags but, Frank inhales the whole thing. I know that what I'm doing tonight is bothering him, he doesn't want to lose me. I can tell he has something to say but, it usually takes him time. He comes right out and said it, "Hey, Alex-"
"I know that I can't really help you tonight. That gate is impossible for me."
"I know but, I can still use you. I need someone to help give me a boost."
"Yea- I can do that."

I'm smiling really hard, his statement is boosting up my engines! Im ready for the road. I put my arm over his shoulder, "Thank you, Frank."
I have to get into the junkyard to reclaim what's rightfully mines but, in order for me to do that- there's a huge gate that I need to climb.

However he simply cannot do it because of his size- it's near impossible. So instead, his shoulders are going to work their magic. Right now- I need all the help that I can get.

July 14th, 2016, 02:40 AM
has a teenage angst theme running through it..cool

July 15th, 2016, 03:31 AM

It's nightfall, we sneak away from my parents. My leather jacket helps me sift through the shadows; we move like ninja. We crawl through the back alleys of the houses in the area.

"We're are you going boys?" Karren copper is sitting on her swing set- in her back yard; she can see us pass her fence. She's wearing her favorite purple dress, it goes well with the night stars.

"Im getting my ball back." I replied. She gives us a look that lets us know she's disappointed but, deep inside- I know that she's rooting for us. "Just make sure you come back in one piece."

We get to the junkyard and somehow the gate is taller than what I first remembered. The darkness looks impenetrable- there are huge towers of scraps leaning over the skyline.
The whole thing looks like a jungle.

Frank gets on his knees and I get up on his shoulders- he carries me upwards, I grab the gate and climb in. The three dogs immediately wake up! They can sense me nearby, "Run!" Frank quietly whispers.

I'm going to take his advice- I see a red car; I get on top of it. My heart is pounding like a drum. The dogs gather around the car and corner me- I'm trapped! What am I going to do!?

I pull out my father's air pistol and I shot it in the air- they panick, they take a couple steps back- confused.
The prey has now become the hunter. "Stand back or I'll shoot!" They look hesitant to try anything- Frank gives me the thumps up.

I slowly step off the vehicle and get down, "Alright- nobody moves...or I'll SHOOT!!!" I'm taking them hostage- they can't do a thing. "I'm getting outta here, capiche!?" I may or may not have watched one too many gangsters.

They stand at me- terrified. They are obeying me like their master. A set cop lights starts flashing. Dang it! They must of heard my gunshots.
"Sick em boys!" The dogs take off running at the entrance, this is great.

It looks like I'm getting out alive after all. I grab my brother's ball, and leap back over the gate. Me and Frank are running for our lives, the policeman calls out on his speakers, "Hey, stop it right there!!!"

We don't look back, "Let's go in the alleys." Frank said. We run like wild man, the adrenaline is pumping through my veins- I have never been so afraid in my entire life! This rush is pushing me beyond my limits, and for the first time in my life I actually feel like I'm free.

July 15th, 2016, 02:02 PM
I really enjoyed that..cool man

July 23rd, 2016, 09:26 PM
A fun story! There are a few issues I could mention but overall I liked the voice of the piece. It reminded me a lot of the novel, Pigeon English by Steven Kelman which I absolutely loved.