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View Full Version : An Apocalypse story Pt. 2 of 3 (VIOLENCE LANGUAGE)



Joe_Bassett
August 15th, 2015, 02:41 PM
Part Two. Part Three coming soon.
I froze. I needed to go but I also didn't want to get stuck out in the halls during a lockdown. I decided to make what would ordinarily be a poor decision and stay but that day it was the best decision of my life.

As I was washing my hands I heard gunfire. It was such an uncommon noise that I didn't recognize it at first. I thought maybe someone had dropped something large. It wasn't until the fourth and fifth iteration of the noise followed by the sound of screaming that I realized what was happening. Then there was a loud explosion that shook the ground. I fell under the sink.

The screaming continued and I heard glass shatter somewhere outside the bathroom. There were sirens and more gunfire. I did exactly what I was told NOT to do and panicked. I waited for a lull in the gunfire and pulled open the door only for the body of a student to fall on me. I pushed it away, resisting the urge to throw up when I saw that her brains were on her shirt.

I picked myself up and dashed to the classroom. The door was partially closed and I burst through it to find desks overturned and students huddled against the wall.

"MATT!" I yelled. Even though we never talked nowadays, I HAD to know if he was ok. "MATT!!" I shouted looking wildly about the room.

"Keep your voice down!" someone hissed at me.

"Where's Matt?" I asked the room in general.

The teacher peered over her desk, " He went looking for you, Sam"

My heart dropped to my stomach. Matt...He was such an idiot sometimes...but I couldn’t lose him. He was MY idiot and, it takes an idiot to find another idiot, so guess what I did... Yup. Went back out there yelling his name.

I ran through the halls. He couldn't have traveled far. Perhaps he had a rare moment of genius and was hiding somewhere.

I rounded a corner, "MATT!" I shouted. Receiving no answer I turned around intending to return the way I came but ran smack into someone instead. I had no time to decide friend or foe so I slammed my fist into my assailant's stomach. He grunted and doubled over.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Matt gasped out. I threw my arms around him. I was so glad to find him, alive.

"Jeez, Sam, you punch me and then try to strangle me. I suppose I was wrong to assume you'd be in any danger on your own" Matt complained.

"Oh, Sorry" Secretly I wasn't. He sort of deserved it for almost giving me a heart attack. And for being an occasional asshole, well, a complete asshole.

Gunshots brought us back to the situation at hand. We still needed to get somewhere safe. Just down the hall was a set of doors leading outside to the parking lot. Matt had an old Toyota that he drove to school. It was literally fifteen feet from the door. We could make it there and get out in no time. He needed to get home. So did I. I had a family to worry about too.

I gestured towards the doors and he hesitated but then nodded. The police were here, they could take care of the gunmen. We sprinted down the hall. We were right at the glass double doors when one of the pane shattered as a bullet sped past. Behind us a bulky figure in protective gear with rifle was hoofing it at a good pace. He or she raised their rifle once more. I pushed Matt down and threw open a door as a bullet sped through the space his head had occupied mere seconds ago.

We tore through the doors towards the old Toyota. More bullets slammed into cars nearby us and I kept thinking each gunshot would be the last thing I heard. We made it to the car and ripped the doors open, tumbling into the seats.

A bullet tore off one of the side mirrors. "Ahh, Shit!" Matt swore a he fumbled with the ignition. Another round shattered a backseat window.

"What the hell is taking so long?!" I shouted.

"It's not starting, Goddammit!.. There!" The engine suddenly roared into life. "Reverse! Reverse!"I yelled as Matt stomped on the accelerator. We slammed into the car in front of us.

Swearing profusely Matt threw the car into reverse and screeched out of the parking spot. Throwing it into drive, he shot it out of the parking lot like a dart smelling of burnt rubber.

I don't remember the rest of the drive very well. I just remember slowing down near an empty stretch of roadside, stopping finally on the shoulder. WE both sat there in shock waiting for the adrenaline to pass out of our systems.

"What the hell just happened?!" I breathed. My stomach felt sick and I was shaking all over.

"My question exactly"

I looked over at him. He was paler than a ghost and his knuckles were completely white as he gripped the steering wheel. I put a hand on his arm. He looked completely shell-shocked.



A while later we pulled into the driveway of my house. Matt was still pale but he was breathing much more calmly and the shell-shocked expression was changing to one of worry.

I got out of the car. What if this was the last time I ever saw him, or any of my friends. He idled the car for a moment, thinking about something.

"Hey, Sam, you stay safe alright?" he told me simply. Then he left. I stood outside my house thinking of the days events. Foolishly I felt more concerned my parents would think I was ditching school.

I opened the garage door and passed the gun safe. What was in that safe, I was unaware at the time, would be what built my current reputation, what would help me stay alive.

DATo
August 15th, 2015, 09:00 PM
Nice story so far. The strength of this story rests upon the manner in which it is being told. The narrative is straight forward and clearly expressed. If there is a weak point it is in the logic of the story itself. Apparently there are terrible events in motion which have brought down the White House and one would suspect other key targets throughout the U.S.A. but it begs the question: why would powers as capable as this target a school? A school, one would think, would be an extremely low priority to forces which seem intent on bringing down the country. I realize that I have read only part of the story and that this question might be explained in future installments.

But I must say, the writing itself is very, very good. It has captured my interest and I would like very much to read more.

Joe_Bassett
August 15th, 2015, 09:28 PM
Well, I see your point. The thing is, I can't think of a plausible event. Currently I'm thinking it's the work of a home-grown terrorist organisation. If you've got any suggestions I'd be glad to hear them.

Sleepwriter
August 15th, 2015, 10:04 PM
It's got a Red Dawn feel to it. The school's mascot is not a wolverine is it? Seriously though, I thought the writing was pretty clean, a few punctuation issues, but I'm interested in knowing what happens next.

DATo
August 15th, 2015, 11:27 PM
Well, I see your point. The thing is, I can't think of a plausible event. Currently I'm thinking it's the work of a home-grown terrorist organisation. If you've got any suggestions I'd be glad to hear them.

Just a suggestion. Rather than have a terrorist appear at the school let us say that the school dismisses the students and Sam & Matt try to make it to her home which is the closest to the school. Along the way they encounter a terrorist act in progress, perhaps an attempt to destroy the local water treatment center or electrical works. They then become involved in what is taking place when they are taken as hostages. Something like that. In this case the terrorists are not targeting a school or school kids intentionally because they have more important things to do, but the kids fall into their hands by accident. This has a more believable ring to it.

Joe_Bassett
August 15th, 2015, 11:41 PM
Well, the intended situation is that somehow the united states is reduced to little more than a pile of rubble and the survivors are forced to find ways to survive. The organisation, previously invisible, does this and other random acts of terror to sort of catalyse a reaction which would end in a "Walking Dead" type of world -minus the zombie of course. The school attack would fall under random acts of terror. Perhaps multiple schools were attacked in different locations. Either way, it would put the main character at the beginning of the events and act as a wake-up call.

The next part, Part three begins some time later after a mutated version of a common virus wipes out a considerable number of survivors. Sam hasn't seen Matt since the day of the school attack. She doesn't know if he's alive or if the virus got him.

DATo
August 15th, 2015, 11:56 PM
Well, the intended situation is that somehow the united states is reduced to little more than a pile of rubble and the survivors are forced to find ways to survive. The organisation, previously invisible, does this and other random acts of terror to sort of catalyse a reaction which would end in a "Walking Dead" type of world -minus the zombie of course. The school attack would fall under random acts of terror. Perhaps multiple schools were attacked in different locations. Either way, it would put the main character at the beginning of the events and act as a wake-up call.

The next part, Part three begins some time later after a mutated version of a common virus wipes out a considerable number of survivors. Sam hasn't seen Matt since the day of the school attack. She doesn't know if he's alive or if the virus got him.

I stand corrected. Please continue with your original plan. This sounds very exciting.

Sleepwriter
August 16th, 2015, 12:33 AM
If you are going to reduce a country to rubble. You will need to take out their technolgy somehow. Drop all or most public utilities. If Matt and Sam were children of high ranking govt officials that would make them or their school a target.


Okay so no zombies, what about some really dirty hungry cannibals?

Joe_Bassett
August 16th, 2015, 01:18 AM
Perhaps a couple of well placed EMPs? I'm not well-versed in reducing countries to rubble.
Leave that to my brother...

I was thinking that the school attack would be a random act of violence. Something without cause or purpose, merely to show off or incite chaos.

The main bad guys would be the members of the shadowy organisation. In the aftermath they would have taken over various military bases from which they begin recruiting survivors who align with their worldview.

Crowley K. Jarvis
August 16th, 2015, 01:58 AM
I'm enjoying this so far.

Just my little opinions, feel free to disregard them. ;P

---

A simple school shooting seems a little too innocent for an organization that has planned and put into action events that would cause a world-end scenario. I would say they target the young as ones easily intimidated, dominated, recruited, and trained. I would say they began kidnapping.

In my eyes, (again, my opinion) too many stories depict such scenarios with a lack of realism and impossibly optimistic characters. :C

That was one way I believe to make this organization seem like more than just 'bad guys,' and closer to the stuff of legend, that we actually fear may exist.

Anyways, my two cents. I mean nothing harshly. Keep writing, all the best!

Joe_Bassett
August 16th, 2015, 02:40 AM
Crowley, Perhaps I could incorporate your theory into the story. It wouldn't be too unlikely to target the school to kidnap the students. Then the bad guys could probably kill a few teachers or students that stand in their way. I would not need to change much of what I've already put down and instead could reveal the purpose of the attack later on, which was something I had planned to do, eventually. Part three is out as well.